#Junkie (GearShark #1)(54)

I snickered. “You said lady boner.”

His lips twitched, but then he crossed his arms over his chest and this look came over his face… a look I was pretty sure I would see reflected if I looked in a mirror.

Jealousy.

He was jealous of Joey, and I was jealous of every stranger he would consider… trying things with.

“Try with me.” My words were abrupt.

His hazel eyes widened and the arms crossed over his wide chest fell to his sides. “What?”

“You want to try with a guy. See what it’s like… Use me.”

Temptation flashed in his eyes, and it made me hungry. It made me feel like I’d been starving for a very long time and didn’t even know it.

Temptation gave way to resolve.

“No,” he replied, flat.

“Why the hell not!” I demanded.

“Because you’re my best friend.”

“You said there might be more.” I shifted a little closer.

He didn’t back up.

“What about you, Drew?” Trent’s voice was tentative. “Do you think there might be more?”

Here it was.

The moment of truth. The moment I had to be honest with myself.

A sudden surge of panic slapped me in the middle. I’m not ready. I’m not ready for this. I’m not as brave as Trent.

And Trent was brave. In that moment, he was the bravest person I’d ever met.

He took my silence for decision, and his shoulders slumped just a fraction as he turned away. “It’s okay, man. I get it.”

“Wait,” I said and caught his wrist.

Both of us paused and glanced down to where I held him. He felt strong and solid beneath my grip. Not delicate and fine-boned like all the women I’d bedded in the past. Trent was warm and sure. He was a net strong enough to catch me. Strong enough to take my fall.

No one had ever been strong enough for me before.

Suddenly, it was do or die. It was Trent or my fear.

If I let my fear win, we would never be the same again. Sure, we’d stay friends. We would always be friends. But he would drift away… He would go back to that bar. I would lose him.

Maybe not completely, but too much.

I wanted all of him.

“There could be,” I whispered.

His arm jolted in my hand.

“I think there could be more. I’d like to… try. I want to see.”

My heart was thudding so heavily in my chest I felt unsteady. My stomach was so fluttery I partially worried I might be sick. No one had ever affected me like this.

No one.

And it was because of the completely rattled and unsteady way I felt that I understood something that only shook me further.

This was real. Whatever this was, it was the most intense feeling I’d ever known.

Trent turned back, his attention going to where my hand still clung to his arm. I wasn’t trying to stop him from leaving anymore. Now I was holding on because I needed someone to ground me.

I was scared.

“You’re shaking,” he whispered and gently took his free hand and wrapped it around my forearm to slide his down and gently disengage my grip.

But he didn’t let go. Instead, he entwined his steady fingers with my quivering ones.

I ceased to think. Not because I wanted to miss the moment, but because my brain simply could not process everything at once.

In that moment, my feelings were a hundred times stronger than any thought would ever be.

Still holding my hand, Trent stepped up close. The toes of his shoes bumped my sock-covered ones. He was like a furnace, a cherished heat source when you stepped inside from a cold, blustery day. His warmth wrapped around me, and I welcomed it into my pores.

The pad of his thumb stroked over the back of my hand, reminding me of the way I’d felt in the car when he’d done the same. My stomach tightened with anticipation, and I dragged in a ragged breath.

“Are you sure?” Trent murmured, his thumb doing that stroking thing again.

I nodded because, like I said, I couldn’t speak.

His free hand came up and rested on the side of my neck. The second he made contact, my eyes slid closed as I let myself feel the current of desire flowing down to my toes.

“Hey,” he whispered, and I met his hazel gaze.

He made this sound. A cross between a grunt and growl, the kind of sound a man made when he was completely satisfied, and then the distance between us was no more.

His hand tightened slightly at my neck the second our lips made contact. The first taste was soft and easy, tentative even. It wasn’t like I expected it to be. By the way my body was humming, I expected there to be some sort of electric surge.

But it wasn’t like that.

Not when we first touched.

It was this intense feeling of relief. Of finally finding the place I belonged.

I made a sound; I heard it somewhere in the distance. Trent covered my lips again, and I opened for him, fusing our mouths completely together.

Oh God.

Suddenly, the hand holding mine was gone and I was up against his expansive, hard chest. His arm clutched around my waist, holding me close, and the hand originally at my neck was now deep in the hair on the back of my head.

He kissed deeply, far deeper than I’d ever been kissed before. He had the size, he had the strength, and dear baby Jesus, he had the tongue.