Where Shadows Meet(101)
She thought she heard something, so she stopped and looked back, but he looked just the same. Pale, motionless. Dying unless she did something. Squaring her shoulders, she went out of the room and down the hall to the waiting room, where she stood for a moment and watched her daughter color. Caitlin sat at a child-sized red table and chair set.
Was there ever such a beautiful child? Hannah thought not. So sweet and unassuming too. Matt had done a wonderful job with her. She tore her gaze from her daughter and went to sit beside Irene and Gina. “I’ll call in a couple of days and see how he is, if you don’t mind.”
“Of course,” Gina said.
Hannah glanced at Irene. “Did you know about your mother?”
Irene sighed and rubbed her head. “I suspected. Her bitterness grew after I had Reece and ended up in a sanitarium for two years. Then when David killed himself, she fell apart. It got harder and harder to be around her. I’d go over there and all she’d talk about was how terrible all the Amish were and how the Schwartzes would get what they deserved someday. When their barn burned back in the late seventies, I suspected she had something to do with it. Then ten years ago when she heard Patricia was pregnant again, all her anger came spewing out. We had an argument, and we never spoke again.” She looked up. “Bitterness is a terrible thing. It eats a person alive.” She chewed on her lip. “The darkness comes sometimes and even I can’t fight it.” She plucked something off her blouse.
“It was nice getting to know you, Irene.” She hugged the older woman, then held out her hand to Gina. “Thank you for taking care of my little girl. I’ll call and check on her from time to time, if you don’t mind. Maybe you could e-mail me a picture once in a while.”
“I’ll do that.” Gina embraced her. “I wish we’d had time to get to know one another better.”
“Me too.” Blinking back the tears, Hannah put a smile on her face and stepped closer to her little girl. “Hey, Caitlin. Is that picture for Daddy?”
The little girl nodded without looking up. “He loves princesses. I’m his number one princess.”
“Of course you are. You’re the most important thing in his life.” Hannah touched her daughter’s unruly hair, then knelt. “I have to go away. Do you think I could have a hug?” Caitlin put down the crayon and came willingly into Hannah’s arms. “Are you coming back?”
“No, honey, I’m not. I have to leave you here with your aunt Gina. She’ll take good care of you until your daddy is well. And he’ll be well very soon.”
“I thought you were my new mommy. Your hair is fairy hair like mine.” Caitlin’s small fingers caressed Hannah’s thick locks. Over Caitlin’s shoulders, Hannah could see Gina, Irene, and Angie weeping. It took every ounce of strength Hannah possessed to give her daughter one last fierce hug, then turn her loose. “I love you just as much as any mommy could love a little girl. I’ll pray for you every day. You take care of your daddy, okay?”
Caitlin nodded. “I always take care of him. We bake cookies. Chocolate chip are his favorite.” She went to her backpack and rummaged through it. Lifting out her doll, she carried the battered toy back to where Hannah stood. “Will you take Jenny? I’ll be busy taking care of Daddy, and she’ll need a new mommy.”
Tears flooded Hannah’s eyes. “I’d be honored to take care of her for you. Are you sure, sweetheart?”
Caitlin nodded. “Don’t let her forget me.”
“I won’t.” Hannah couldn’t take much more. “You’d better finish your picture. Daddy will be awake soon and you’ll want to give it to him.”
“Okay.” Caitlin sat back down at the little table and bent her head.
Breathe. In and out. Hannah hugged Irene and Gina, then followed Angie out to the car.
“You didn’t have to do this,” Angie said, her tone fierce.
But Hannah knew better. “Let’s get out of here,” she said. “I need to go home and pack my stuff. Get my cats.”
“But where are you going?”
“I’m not sure.” Just away from the pain.
“You’ll keep in touch with me, won’t you? I’ll be working on publicity for the new book. The editor is really happy with it.”
“You have to promise not to give in to Matt’s questions when he comes looking for me.” Hannah knew Matt. He’d look for her and keep looking even though the letter she’d left explained everything and told him not to. Even though she’d warned him.
“I’ll keep my mouth shut.”
Though Angie sounded sulky, Hannah believed her. “Let’s go.”
They collected her cats and her belongings and headed to Milwaukee. Hannah had a plan, nebulous though it was. At least the challenge would give her something to think about instead of all she’d left behind. It would take hard work, but that’s what she needed now—something that left her too exhausted at night to remember a set of blue eyes that told her she was special.
TWENTY - EIGHT
“The Double Wedding Ring Quilt has been loved by all generations. Amish weddings are most often held on Tuesday or Thursday. A surefire way to tell if a daughter is getting married is to check out the garden. An overabundance of celery signals upcoming nuptials.”