When August Ends(65)

I drove past the exit we normally took to get to the new house. Heather didn’t question where we were going. A few minutes later, we pulled into a desolate parking area that overlooked Lake Winnipesaukee.

I turned the car off and leaned my head back against the headrest before turning to her. “I wanted to look at the stars with you one last time.”

Her voice was breathy. “Is that all you want?”

Fuck no, it isn’t. I rubbed my hand over her thigh, feeling my erection growing by the second.

“I need you one more time before you go, Noah. Please.”

No way could I stop this; I was feeling too weak. I’d been a Boy Scout these past several weeks, but I’d run out of whatever had kept me in control. I knew damn well why I’d taken her here. It wasn’t only to look at the stars. I had to have her, too.

She reached over and placed her hand on my crotch, and I knew I was done. Her eyes brimmed with desire. I drew in a ragged breath as I leaned over to devour her lips, letting out weeks of pent-up frustration. She moaned into my mouth as our kiss grew frantic.

She climbed over to the driver’s seat to straddle me.

Desperate to be inside of her, I unbuckled my belt and unzipped my jeans.

There was one major problem, though. I didn’t have a condom.

I stopped the kiss long enough to say, “I don’t have anything with me…no condoms.”

“It’s okay. I’m on the pill. I have been this whole time.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, as long as you’re—”

“I’m good. Got a clean bill of health before I left Pennsylvania, and I’ve always been safe.”

She kissed me ravenously as she reached under her skirt and worked her panties down her legs.

I was rock hard as I took my dick out of my jeans and guided her body onto mine. Sinking into her warm pussy felt even more incredible than I’d remembered.

I’d only had unprotected sex when I was married; I’d never trusted any other woman enough to do it without a condom. I’d forgotten what it even felt like. But it had never felt this amazing. Nothing had.

“Fuck, Heather. You feel too damn good like this.” I thrust into her harder.

Our eyes locked. She dug her fingernails into my hair.

The truck shook as we were completely lost in each other. It was terrifying to be inside of her with thoughts of tomorrow looming. She felt like mine in every way right now, and I didn’t want that to change.

But I needed to let her go to know whether she really was mine.

It didn’t take long for our starving bodies to lose control. We gasped for air as I quaked beneath her, emptying my cum as she squeezed her pussy around my cock. That thing. I was so freaking grateful to have felt it again, so freaking grateful for every second we had left.

***

The sound of birds chirping woke me. Heather was still asleep in my arms in the backseat of the truck.

I had only dozed off for a little bit. We’d been up most of the night.

Heather had fallen asleep before I did. In the middle of the night, I’d reached into my glove compartment for a notepad I kept there and had written her a letter. I would probably be too overwhelmed later to articulate my feelings, so I wanted to get them down while they were fresh. Being intimate with her again had brought out everything I’d been suppressing.

I’d lost count of the number of times we’d had sex last night. It seemed like enough to undo all those days of celibacy, though. And made what was set to happen today even harder.

Heather stirred before she looked up at me.

“What time is it?” she asked.

“I’m not sure. But it doesn’t matter. I’m in no rush.”

“I didn’t think I’d be able to fall asleep.” She yawned. “Figured we’d just stay up all night.”

“Well, we definitely used a lot of energy. It’s no wonder you crashed.”

She curled into me. I kissed the top of her head as we stared out at the morning sun over the lake, a virtual clock ticking in my brain.

There were no words.

***

The rest of that day was one big blur.

Suddenly, I was standing in front of my packed truck with nothing left to do but say goodbye to Heather. I wished for something to delay me—a mishap or flat tire, maybe. But everything was in place, even Bonnie and Clyde, loaded up with tons of hay and situated in their carriers in the backseat.

I felt sick.

When I took her in my arms, Heather’s cry was so intense it was silent. She buried her face in my chest. “This doesn’t feel right.”

I felt my own tears close to the surface. I fought them with all my might. I couldn’t let her see my sadness right now. I needed to be strong for both of us.

“Heather, look at me.” I swiped my finger beneath her eye. “Look at me, baby.”

There was so much I wanted to tell her, but I needed to be careful. If I admitted I was in love with her, she might take that as a sign she shouldn’t go away. I still felt she needed the experience that lay ahead of her more than anything.

Holding on to her face and looking into her eyes, I said, “This isn’t goodbye.”

Her voice trembled. “Why does it feel so much like it, then?”

“We’ll take it day by day, okay?”