Unveiled (Torn #6)(26)
Carter better not be indulging in some ganja goodness, or I will seriously embarrass him right in front of all these unfamiliar faces.
Navigating through the human traffic was difficult since a few people were blowing bubbles, a couple were throwing metallic petals in the air, and on top of this mass chaos, they were playing suck and blow with what looked liked Brody’s credit card. Through it all, my brother wasn’t hard to spot since he sat in the far right corner of the room, resting on a chaise lounge while girls flirted with him. He appeared tired, though he seemed like he was having the time of his life.
Once I reached him, I made a dramatic eye roll before taking a seat next to him, shooing the little ratchets as I did so. Well, there is still some bitchiness in me, I happily thought as I grinned at Carter.
“Is this Brody’s version of recuperation? I don’t think the doctor would approve.”
He smirked just as someone came over to give him a high five. “You look more miserable than I do, and that’s sayin’ something, sis,” he addressed me right after the guy left, giving me a raised brow.
Shrugging, I whispered, “It’s nothing.” I broke eye contact and started looking over the sea of people. As usual, it didn’t take long until I found Cooper, a guy I used to date to pass the time, flirting with some poor freshman in the background.
“You’re sad he left, aren’t you?” Carter kept on yapping, not letting the subject of my obvious misery go. “Well, what the heck, why don’t you go after your dude?”
Easy for him to suggest, but not that easy to do. Well, not really.
“It’s complicated.” I hoped those two significant words would explain themselves, but nope, no such luck.
Apparently, Carter thought my love life needed to be pried into and discussed right there, out in the open, where people were celebrating whatever in their high mental state of ganja goodness.
“Not really, not to me anyway. And, if you tell me the reason you’re staying here is because of me, I’m telling you you’re not needed here. As you can see, I’m well taken care of. Don’t let these things hold you back. I know they’re good excuses, but trust me when I say that, sometimes, we don’t know where life is taking us. Things can change in a heartbeat, and you not being there after what you did to him, that’s saying a lot. Maybe he’d understand, but what about his family? Go after him before it’s too late. I wish I’d done that with Emma in the very beginning, had my pride not gotten in the way. Maybe if I did that, she wouldn’t have known Bass at all,” he openly reflected for the first time, not holding back from me. “It’s the little things we don’t pay attention to that really f*uk you over. When you love someone, don’t hesitate, because you never know when it’ll end, or you’re going to end up like me, with only memories to hold on to.”
For f*uk’s sake, I couldn’t stand it. Why did he make it sound like it was the end of the world? It sure as heck wasn’t. Ugh.
“It’s not too late for you, either, Carter. You’re still so young—”
“I know I am, but do you have any idea how difficult it was to fall in love? Let alone what it meant for me,” he somberly said, wishfully thinking. “Some guys just don’t fall that easily. It’s not by choice, but by how nature wired us.” He blew out a breath, reaching out to play with my hair like he used to when I was younger. “Be happy, sis … for us, for you. I would feel so much better if one of us is at least happy in that department. I might be hopeless, but you … You still have a shot at happiness, so don’t f*uk this up like you always do. It’s not healthy, and we’re both going to end up single and miserable forever.”
Rolling my eyes at his dramatic portrayal of the future, I said, “Well, at least we can be thankful that, if that ever happens, we won’t have to spread our toxic mentality to our spawn.”
He made a horrified face, shaking his head. “A little version of you? Yeah, that sounds f*uking terrifying.”
“Stupid!” I smacked his arm before he started chuckling, as if it was the funniest thing he had heard all day. I enjoyed listening to him laugh and the light banter we had. He was going to be fine, as long as he didn’t get too crazy obsessing over the past.
“You sure you’re going to be fine if I leave? I worry about you, Carter.” I made a face, a look that showed utter confusion. “What’s with you downing Emma’s old perfumes anyway?”
“I didn’t mean shit when I started sniffing it.” He grimaced, as if he was remembering what had happened that night before shaking his head. “I don’t know. It was one of those nights where things came back a little stronger than most, and it was difficult to fight it back. I used to fall asleep smelling her scent … and I don’t know, Linds. Guess shit got out of hand.”
“You think?” It had gone beyond out of hand. It had been reckless and stupid. “God, I thought you were going to die,” I exclaimed loud enough for him to hear how upset I had been yet not loud enough for everyone in the room to gather.
“I’m not that easy to kill. You should give me a little credit. Come on, now.”
I laughed, knowing well enough that he was one solid schmuck. “Sure. That’s what they all say, right?”
He smiled before looking away, as if he was anywhere but there. “I spoke to her the other night.” His voice held a sentimental tone in it, nostalgic. “Hearing her voice … made me feel stronger.”