Until Harry(68)

I stared at him in disbelief. “What, Kale?”

“I love you a lot,” he slurred. “Be with me.”

“Do you hear yourself?” I snapped, anger surging through my veins.

He shoved his finger in my face and said, “No, but I know what you’re saying, or what I’m saying.”

He was hurting my head.

“Love you.” He beamed. “Be mine.”

“No,” I snapped, and pushed his hand away. “No, you don’t love me – you love Drew.”

Pain and awareness flashed across his face.

“I love both of you.”

I laughed humourlessly. “Aren’t you lucky having two girls on the go?”

Kale scowled at me, stumbling to the left. “Stop that. Don’t be hurtful.”

“You’re being hurtful!” I retorted. “This is evil what you’re doing, I’m not doing this with you.”

“I love you,” he repeated as if I’d never spoken. “Be with me.”

He’ll wake up sober tomorrow and regret saying any of this, just like he did after we had sex.

I swallowed. “No, Kale.”

He stared at me, his eyes inflamed. “No?”

I nodded. “No.”

He swallowed, and I saw the muscle in his jaw roll back and forth.

“Okay,” he said, his voice low. “Okay.”

I was doing this to protect my own heart, and to protect him from having to talk his way out of this tomorrow morning, but it didn’t make saying what I did any easier.

“We’re best friends,” I whispered. “I’m like your sister.”

That word was like vinegar in my mouth.

Kale almost glared at me as he nodded. “Okay.” He stretched the word out.

I stepped towards him, but he stumbled away from me.

“I’m going to my parents’ house,” he said. “See you later, Lane.”

He turned and walked away from me then, and with every step he took, my legs threatened to run after him, but I forced myself to turn around and go back into my parents’ house. I halted at the top of the stairs and stared at my bedroom door.

I didn’t want to sleep on my own – not tonight. Not after what had just happened. Without much thought, I walked towards my parents’ room and opened the door.

“Mum?” I whispered.

She shot upright in her bed. “I’m awake – are you okay?”

I hesitated in speaking for a moment and then shook my head.

“Can I sleep with you?” I whispered.

“I’ll go into your room,” my father’s voice said as he got out of bed. “Get in beside your mother, darling.”

He stood out of my way as I walked around to his side of the bed and crawled into it and wrapped my arms around my mother. I hated what I was doing to them. I had slept with my mother a lot after I came home from the hospital, because I was having nightmares, and I knew they both had trouble sleeping because they were so worried about me.

“I feel broken,” I muttered against my mother’s chest.

“It will be okay, baby,” she whispered, and kissed my head. “I promise.”

My father left the room, and I heard a loud bang seconds later as if he’d hit something.

“Do you want to talk to me, or to someone, about what happened?” she asked.

I blinked in the darkness.

She thought I was in her arms because of what Jensen had tried to do to me, but I wasn’t. I was still in a state of shock over that, but I felt like the only damage from that night was the small physical marks he left, and once they were gone, he had no hold over me. He’d scared me straight; I would never again behave the way I did to get myself into a situation like that.

I swore it to myself.

What my mother didn’t know was that it was the person she considered a son who had me so torn up and vulnerable. She didn’t know that he was the reason I used to drink and got lost in different lads. She didn’t know I gave him my virginity and that he didn’t remember a single thing about it. She didn’t know I had been in love with him since I was ten years old, and she definitely didn’t know I’d give up everything to be his.

My mother didn’t know she had raised a complete idiot, and she wouldn’t if I had anything do with it. I was going to change. Everything was going to change.





CHAPTER THIRTEEN

Day four in York

Lane, are you ready?”

I jumped with fright when Layton’s voice called my name.

“Sorry,” he said, laughing from behind me. “Didn’t mean to scare you.”

I got up from the kitchen table and turned to face him.

“You didn’t scare me.”

My brother grinned. “Aye, that’s why you almost jumped out of your skin then?”

I scrunched up my nose, making him laugh.

“Are we good to go?” I asked.

He nodded. “Nanny is just using the loo, and then we’re heading out.”

I nodded. “Come in and close the door then; I want to speak to you.”

Layton eyed me warily. “About what?”

I didn’t exactly know. I just knew I needed to speak to him to make sure we were okay. I was cool with my nanny, Lochlan, my parents, and that left Layton and Kale for me to square away any spot of bother that lingered.