Unmarriageable(83)

‘Not just her life.’ Jena’s voice was steel. ‘It would affect her children’s reputations and her grandchildren’s reputations. Is this not what we face? Thanks to Aunty Tinkle’s slander concerning our grandmother’s supposed profession, people malign us even though no one can furnish a shred of proof towards that rumour.’

‘I dare not imagine,’ Alys said, ‘what will happen to Jujeena’s story in the hands of people like Rose-Nama and her mother and Naheed and Hammy and Sammy.’

‘I can,’ Jena said softly. ‘These people could be having premarital sex and abortions left, right, and centre, but they’ll put on such self-righteous airs you’ll think they are the world’s greatest naik parveens, pious women.’

‘Internal misogyny has made a mockery of female solidarity,’ Alys said, forlorn. ‘It’s not even as if abortion is the issue. Married women here use it as birth control. It’s all about premarital sex. Are you a virgin or not?’

‘And these pigeon problems,’ Jena said in despair, ‘are only meant to preoccupy us while the men are free to focus their energies on the important things in life.’

‘Can you imagine the schadenfreude?’ Alys said. ‘How gleeful people will be to hear of Jujeena and Darsee’s scandal? In front of Jujeena they’ll say, “Poor Jujeena this, poor Jujeena that,” but behind her back they will call her a slut and blame her for becoming pregnant. All the while, even as they condemn Wickaam for being vile, women will try to reform him with their own true love, while men will slap him on his back for being such a manly man. This is the society we live in.’

The sisters were still talking in hushed whispers when the bus reached Dilipabad, where they were met by their family, amid a cacophony of greetings.

‘Missed you both so much,’ Mr Binat said, hugging his eldest daughters.

‘He did,’ Mrs Binat said, giving Jena and Alys pecks on their cheeks. ‘Your father wants to discuss his beloved flora and fauna, and no one else has the patience to hear him blather on about aeration and lime content. You look so relaxed and refreshed, Jena.’

‘Do I look like I’ve lost any weight?’ Qitty tightened her kurta around her waist. ‘I’ve lost ten pounds since you left.’

‘You do look trimmer,’ Jena said.

‘Shut up about your ten pounds, Qitty,’ Lady said. ‘It’s not visible on your body, so it has to be your brains getting lighter.’

‘Lady! Behave!’ Alys said as she hugged Qitty.

‘Great,’ Lady said. ‘Aunty Alys is back.’

‘Qitty,’ Alys said, ‘I’ve brought you a bundle of used magazines I found, called Mode, for plus-size women.’

‘Did you get the things on my list?’ Lady said.

‘Yes,’ Alys said. ‘Such a long list of nothing but beauty products. Let me remind you: books over looks.’

‘I didn’t have a single beauty product on my list,’ Mari said proudly. ‘I do not care about outer looks but rather the inner beauty of the soul.’

‘Inner beauty of the soul,’ Lady repeated, mimicking Mari in a squeaky voice. ‘Jena, Alys, this is her new thing. Inner beauty of the soul. Mari, you have little outer beauty, so of course you are going to lecture on inner beauty. God, I want a long holiday away from this town and my family. We’re dying of heat here. Jena, Alys, I went to see Mareea Looclus yesterday. She said Fart Bhai has air conditioning everywhere and she was freezing all the time. I wish we could afford to freeze.’

‘We can’t, thanks to Goga and Tinkle,’ Mrs Binat said. ‘May God sprout warts on their privates.’

‘Pinkie, shhh!’ Mr Binat glanced around to see if anyone at the bus stop had overheard. ‘Your curses become more colourful with each passing day.’

‘Mareea also said,’ Lady grumbled, ‘that Sherry bought her everything she wanted and then some.’

Mrs Binat snorted. ‘I’m telling you, she must have bought clearance.’

‘No, Mummy,’ Lady said, ‘I told you I saw the full-price stickers. Also, she was crowing about how Fart Bhai has said that, as soon as she finishes university, she can move in with them. I say, good riddance. If Fart Bhai wants his fish-faced sister-in-law around, good for him. But, Jena, Alys, is it true? Did he really invite her to live with them? It’s so unfair. Even Mareea will leave Dilipabad, while I will languish here and die.’

‘Hai!’ Mrs Binat said. ‘Why will you die? Die karein tumhare dushman. May your enemies die.’

‘They are not dying. They are prospering. Mareea said Fart Bhai is going to replace their shitty motorbike with a car, a very good car. Mummy, imagine those flamingo-faced Mansoor and Manzoor going from being motorbike boys to having a better car than ours. I can’t stand it. Alys, it’s not even as if they worked for it themselves, but you keep saying that us girls must earn everything for ourselves.’

‘Don’t you listen to Alys. Yeh tho pagal hai. She’s mad.’ Mrs Binat’s nostrils fluttered in her despair at Bobia Looclus’s coup after coup. ‘Alys has done nothing for her family, while all that snake Sherry does is elevate hers via her husband’s fat wallet. God only knows what spell she has put on that wife-worshipping Kaleen. Lady, my love, you watch – you will make the best marriage in all of Pakistan and have a million good cars.’