Two Kinds Of Truth(25)

“The slope. It’s a wee bit slippery this time of year. Stay on the path if ye can.”

“Thanks for the sound advice,” and I leave him to finish what’s left of his breakfast and head off in the direction of the hallway. I can smell the beeswax of its oak panelling as soon as I enter. There’s several large coat hooks on the far wall behind the front door. They’re filled with a variety of outdoor gear. I delve between the layers of Barbour jackets to find a couple of waterproofs, trying each one in turn until I find one that fits. When I choose a matching scarf, I realise it probably belonged to Claire. For a second, I have the urge to retrace my steps and invite Jamie to come along, but I let the idea fall away as I get ready to experience my next adventure. I stuff my hat over my ears, zip up the jacket, push my feet into a pair of hiking boots—brought especially for the trip—and I’m ready to roll. When I open the front door, I’m embraced by a burst of fresh air.

As I leave the cottage behind me, I glance back, seeing nothing of Callum, so I head over to the lane that runs parallel with the farm. It’s certainly colder today than yesterday, but it’s one of those mornings that’s sure to blow those lingering cobwebs away.

Scurrying grey clouds scud across a wintry sun, then I catch sight of a single lapwing. Its little black and white body dives closer, heading for a low branch of an oak tree. My gaze follows its descent, mesmerising me, and I’m sure I glimpse an orange vent under its tail. It’s certainly beats the common sparrows I’m accustomed to at home. There’s a real sense of nature here, of beauty and seclusion. The lapwing flies away and I close my eyes and pretend I’m flying by its side. Oh, how I wish I could live here, surrounded by such serenity.

My mobile goes off in my pocket and I open my eyes, shoving my hand inside to retrieve it. It’s a new text message, and it’s from Keira: “How’s it going? Ring me when you can xxx”.

I stuff my phone back into my pocket and make my way onto the lane. I know Keira will be disappointed that this mini break hasn’t repaired any of the damage, as we’d both hoped it would, but then Rome wasn’t built in a day. An image of the famous colosseum crumbles behind my eyes. Callum is the one destroying us. Pain, raw and frightening, claws at my heart. But I’m not giving in so easily. I will never leave him. I love him. Why should I walk away when I’ve done nothing wrong? It isn’t my fault we can’t have children, yet I believe he somehow blames me. Tears prick the back of my eyes, but I force them away. Now isn’t the time to wallow in self-pity. There’ll be time enough later, if I find I cannot salvage what’s left of our marriage.

I take a deep breath and fill my lungs with fresh mountain air. You just can’t beat it, I tell myself. It’s like sweet nectar and I’m invigorated. I shove my hands inside my pockets and set off at a brisk pace.

“Hey, Maddie, hold yir horses,” and I turn around to see Jamie jogging towards me. I frown. Whatever’s the matter? But then I realise he’s carrying something in his hand.

“Here, lass; ye cannae go out in the wilds without taking provisions.”

I look down at a small black rucksack. “I don’t need that,” I protest, rolling my eyes. “I’m only going for a walk.”

“Aye, ye do,” Jamie insists. “There’s nae much inside, just a bottle of water, a first aid kit and a map of the area. Take the backpack, ye ken? Just in case ye get lost, or worse, injured. Ye cannae be too careful. Oh, and the Mountain Search and Rescues mobile number’s written inside the front flap.”

I let out an exaggerated groan. “I’m only going a few miles. It isn’t as though I’m off climbing Ben Nevis.”

“It doesnae matter,” Jamie says, his voice now firm. “Ye can ne’er tell when the weather will turn for the worse.”

With some reluctance, I accept the rucksack and push my arms through the nylon straps.

“Okay; if it’ll make you happy, I’ll take it,” I huff. “Anything to keep the peace.”

“Aye, I’d feel better,” Jamie nods, and I set out on my journey without a backward glance.

I head down a footpath and follow a sign to the stone. To the north, there’s gently rolling hills carved up by lazy stone walls. In the distant sky, far away, there’s a dark band of cloud rolling in from the sea. A chill in the air makes me shiver and the few leaves left on the surrounding trees flicker in the wind.

I veer onto a narrow bridle path and I strain my eyes across the glen, in the hope of seeing the odd stag or doe scrambling through the bracken. All I see is open farmland covered in a sea of yellow gorse. It’s in bloom and the profusion of pretty yellow flowers stand out like the dappled light of sunshine seen beneath a woodland’s high canopy.

In the distance, something else catches my eye. It’s flying straight towards me and I squint, unable to make it out at first. I’m not one-hundred-percent certain, but I’m convinced I’m staring at a golden eagle, its wings flapping effortlessly against the strength of the higher blowing wind. I stop dead in my tracks and curse myself for not bringing the binoculars. It’s ginormous wingspan dips and sweeps across the sky, and just for one second, I wish Jamie was here to share this breath-taking moment with me.

I rummage in my pocket, pull out my phone and quickly take a picture. He may not be here, but I’ll show him what he’s missed later. The phone flashes and the bird changes course and flies off towards the mountains. I’m about to put my phone away when I remember Kiera’s text message and decide to ring her.