Touch Me Not (Manwhore, #1)(70)

She went to the bathroom and took care of her business before she grabbed her purse and the kids’ presents and headed downstairs. She refused to be sad. If she only had him for this weekend, then she was going to enjoy it.

The drive to her mother’s took them about an hour. She lived right outside the city, but with traffic, it took longer than either of them had expected. Lily saw two orange groves on the way. Her mother always raved about the fresh orange juice she got from one of them. She and Lily’s stepfather had moved from North Carolina to Florida right after Lily graduated high school. They loved it, and the kids loved living close to the beach. What kid wouldn’t, though?

When Nikoli slowed the car and pulled into the Spanish style home, Lily got nervous. This was her first big test to see if Nikoli really had helped her deal with her phobia, or if it was just him she could tolerate touching her. What if she started screaming? What if she terrified the twins? What if…

“You’ll be fine, Lily Bells,” Nikoli told her, his eyes calm and reassuring. “You’re better now. You can do this.”

“I don’t know,” she whispered. “If I can’t…”

“You and I have been together for months now, Lily, and nothing bad has happened to me, has it?”

“Well, no.”

“Then have a little faith,” he said. “You aren’t cursed, you aren’t responsible for anyone’s death, and you’re not going to cause anyone to be hurt or to die. You can do this, Lily. I have faith in you, so how about having a little in yourself, Milaya?”

His words wrapped around her, like a cool balm on a hot summer’s day to her rattled nerves, and she returned his smile. She still felt nervous, but the panic that had tried to overwhelm her disappeared. Vanished. Nikoli had that effect on her. He was her woobie. She almost laughed at the thought. She’d had a ratty yellow blanket she’d clutched whenever she was afraid when she was little. Her mama called it her woobie. Nikoli felt like that right now, her own personal woobie.

Her mother stepped out on the porch, and she studied her from where she sat. Lily didn’t look a thing like her mother. Joanna Stanton was a short bundle of energy. Blonde hair was piled up on her head in a messy bun, and she wore a pink tank top and blue jean shorts that showed off her sun kissed skin beautifully. Her mama looked good. The Florida climate suited her.

“Daylight’s wasting,” Lily said.

“What?” Nikoli asked, never having heard her speak like that.

“It’s something my Dad used to say whenever he dreaded doing something. It was his way of reminding himself when something had to be done, there was no point in putting it off.”

“Your father was a wise man,” Nikoli said. “Ready to go?”

Not really, but she got out of the car anyway. She stood staring at her mom. They hadn’t seen each other in a long time. Her mother stared back at her just as intently. Nikoli came over and gently nudged her forward. She glared at him. He needed to give her time. He shook his head no and pushed her forward again. The man was insufferable. He never let her just take a minute and think.

She gave him one more glare and started walking. When she reached the porch, her mother took an automatic step back. She knew Lily’s phobia intimately.

“Hi, Mama,” Lily said, her voice hesitant.

“Lily.” Her mother’s voice was just as soft as hers. Lily used to love listening to her read to her when she was little. “Welcome home, sweetheart.”

Lily closed her eyes and took a deep breath, her thoughts focused on what she was about to attempt. She waited for the panic, for the overwhelming fear to consume her, but all she felt was the warmth and the love she associated with her mother. And Nikoli. She could feel his presence behind her, and she took strength from that.

She walked over to her mother and wrapped her arms around her, hugging her tight. “I love you, Mama.”

Her mother let out a strangled cry and hugged her back just as hard. “Oh, my baby…”

Lily felt her mother’s tears fall down and splash her face. She heard the wonder in her voice. It made her heart cry and swell with love at the same time. She’d deprived herself and her mother of this for years, and now instead of panic, she felt a deep sadness. She’d caused them both so much pain.

“I’m so sorry, Mama,” she whispered, her own tears joining her mother’s. “I didn’t mean to hurt you…I just…I…”

“Hush now, sweet girl.” Her mama stroked her hair like she had when she was a little girl. “Hush and let me hold you.”

Behind her, Lily heard the trunk pop, and she knew Nikoli was getting the gifts she’d bought for her family, but it was only a distant thought. Right now, all she was concerned with was that she was in her mother’s arms with no fear, no panic, no need to start screaming.

And that was all because of Nikoli Kincaid.

They spent the afternoon lounging by the pool while her mother cooked them enough food to feed three armies. The twins were ecstatic to see Lily. She hadn’t spent a lot of time with them in person, but she did Skype with her mom and the twins at least two or three times a week. They tore into their gifts like little fiends and squealed with delight. What really broke Lily’s heart was when they were so shocked she hugged them. She spent two hours just sitting on the floor playing with them, smiling like she hadn’t in a very long time.