The Suite Spot (Beck Sisters #2)
Trish Doller
Bountiful, extra curvy, overweight, fat, plus-size … no matter which word you claim, you are beautiful. This one’s for you.
Be advised, some of the thematic content within contains sexual assault and mentions of child death and suicide.
April
CHAPTER 1
Backpfeifengesicht
German
“a face badly in need of a fist”
Maisie hops from one foot to the other, her oversized backpack flopping up and down as we wait on the front porch for Brian to pick her up. For the past two days, she’s been chattering nonstop about spending the night with Daddy. How they’re going to eat cheeseburger Happy Meals, color pictures of mermaids, and stay up all night watching Disney princess movies. She’ll probably conk out by eight thirty, but I love her optimism.
Her backpack contains an orange-and-white-striped tank top, pink polka-dot shorts, eight pairs of underwear, sock monkey–themed pajamas, a purple toothbrush, a box of crayons, a brand-new mermaid coloring book, her beloved plush giraffe named Fred, and—inexplicably—a snorkel tube. I gently suggested she leave the snorkel tube at home, but she insisted she might need it.
Maisie chants in sync with her hops, “Hap-py Me-uhl! Hap-py Me-uhl!”
All I can do is hope Brian won’t let her down.
I don’t have a romantic story of the night Brian and I met. Not even a meet-cute. We met at a bar when we were both a little drunk and sunburned after a day on Los Olas Beach. He called me “blondie” and bought me a margarita, and I was flattered. The only other guy who’d looked my way that night had said, “Pretty face. Nice tits. Too bad the rest is…” He didn’t finish the sentence. He curled up his nose like my body was too disgusting to consider. Brian thought I was hot, so I slept with him.
“Maybe we should go in the house and get a cold drink while we wait,” I suggest, realizing Brian is fifteen minutes late.
Mom gives me a pointed look through the screen door. She doesn’t say anything, but words are unnecessary when her expression is barbed with meaning. Like I need to be reminded that Brian is unreliable. Tightness gathers in my chest thinking about it, and I take a deep breath to make sure my lungs work.
Inside, Maisie flatly refuses to remove her backpack as I lift her onto a barstool at the breakfast counter. I pour her a glass of guava juice while Mom offers her a couple of peanut butter cracker sandwiches.
“Daddy will be here soon,” Maisie declares, fervent with unwarranted faith in a man who spends most of his free time playing Overwatch. To be fair, she’s only known him for three years, so he hasn’t had as many opportunities to disappoint her. And it’s not Maisie’s fault I accidentally procreated with the most irresponsible man in Fort Lauderdale.
When Brian pulls into the driveway in his tricked-out blue Hyundai, I catch Maisie from falling as she launches herself off the barstool to greet him on the porch. I need to check myself, because I’ve been known to do the same. Brian may have peaked in high school, but that hasn’t stopped him from being adorable.
“Daddy, I told Mama you would be here soon.” Maisie throws her arms around his thighs and squeezes. “And now you are!”
“Here I am.” He ruffles her hair as he offers me a dimpled grin.
“Did you remember to bring a car seat?” I ask, torn between giving in to that grin and yelling at him for being late. The tightness in my chest expands and it feels like I have a school of live fish swimming circles beneath my sternum. “Or do you need to borrow mine again?”
“Um…” His shoulders sag.
I hit the button on my key fob with a sigh, unlocking my car. “What time do you plan on bringing her home?”
“I have a delivery shift in the afternoon, so maybe after breakfast?” Brian hefts Maisie’s car seat, transferring it.
“That’s fine.”
“You could join us,” he says. “Meet us at Lester’s on your way home from work.”
Hanging out at Lester’s Diner used to be our thing. We’d sit for hours, nursing bottomless cups of black coffee because we were broke. Even after Maisie was born, she’d sleep in her carrier in the booth beside me while Brian and I shared an order of loaded fries. Four years later, I’m still living with my mom. Brian and I haven’t moved in together, much less gotten married. My life goals shifted into low gear when I got pregnant. And Brian has never stopped being broke, because he spends all his money on video games and modifications for his stupid car. Objectively, he’s useless, but also super hard for me to resist. My resolve wobbles. It’s that damn grin.
“Mama, please?” Maisie begs, and I crack open like a Cadbury Creme Egg.
“Okay, baby. I’ll see you in the morning.” I lean down to give her one more hug. As I rise, Brian kisses my cheek and I lightly push him away. “Get out of here, and don’t drive too fast with your daughter in the car.”
Brian also spends a lot of money on traffic violations.
When they’re gone, I stop at the mailbox. Cable bill. Water bill. Coupon flyer. There’s also a postcard from Anna. After my sister lost her fiancé, Ben, to suicide, she took his sailboat and went to sea alone. I thought it was selfish and irresponsible, especially when she hardly knew anything about sailing. But as I hold a photo of the Caribbean island where Anna has been staying the past few months, I’m jealous that she walked out of her life and into a better, happier one. I don’t want her to be unhappy, but we got along better when we were both miserable.