The Poison Season(66)

In the distance, a bird called, and Leelo forced her mind back to reality. She pulled away from him and took a deep breath. “I could get lost in you,” she whispered, and for a moment, she was afraid. She remembered what her mother had said, that it wasn’t the falling that killed you. Leelo was undeniably falling for Jaren, and while in the moment it was wonderful to experience all these new feelings, she knew it wouldn’t last.

The fall would end, and what would be left of her then? A broken heart amid a pile of shattered bones?

“That’s funny,” Jaren said, twirling a strand of her hair around his finger. “I feel like I’m finally found.”

And for the moment, Leelo forgot to be afraid.



Chapter Thirty-Eight


The next few days passed in relative peace for Leelo’s household, although on the inside she felt as though she were scrambled up, every part of her vibrating and alive in a way she didn’t recognize. She wasn’t sure how no one else in her family noticed. It was a wonder she didn’t come apart at the seams, sending all those jumbled-up feelings exploding out of her like a flock of startled birds.

Sage was back to her grumpy old self, but at least she wasn’t lying in bed all day or clinging to Leelo. She had recovered some of her focus, which meant she was taking Watcher duty seriously again. Every now and then, doubt or worry would flicker over Sage’s face, but Leelo could see the wheels turn in her cousin’s head, how she brought herself back to the present moment by shutting everything out other than what they were doing. It made her particularly critical of Leelo, but Sage must have assumed that she was thinking about Tate, because she never questioned her.

Miraculously, Fiona seemed to be growing stronger by the day, and Ketty was more cheerful than Leelo could ever remember her being. Of course, she had everything she had ever wanted. Tate was gone, and Sage was engaged to a boy who would provide them with the kind of security they’d been lacking since Kellan and Hugo died. The Hardings were helping sheer the sheep this year, a task that was almost impossible for Ketty to accomplish without Fiona.

Leelo had been hoping to visit Jaren this afternoon, since they’d been on early Watcher duty and she had only been able to see him briefly the past few days, but, to everyone’s surprise, Ketty had proposed a picnic. The weather was perfect, and they were caught up on all the housework for the first time in memory. Leelo hadn’t realized how much they’d all taken on to account for Fiona’s illness. Before, she’d only been able to knit in bed or by the fire, which did help the family financially. But now she was also gardening and cleaning, which gave Leelo and Sage a little more time to themselves.

But as much as she wanted to see Jaren—her thoughts had been on little else since their last meeting, and she found herself flushing at memories in the middle of meals or Watcher duty—she had to admit it was nice that Fiona and Ketty were getting along so well. Fiona was sitting back on her elbows, her face turned up to the sun, looking at peace for once, with no strained lines around her eyes and mouth from the constant pain.

As Ketty laid out their lunch, Sage went to fetch some water from a nearby stream. Leelo was sitting next to her mother, braiding wild daisies into a chain and trying not to remember bathing with Jaren, when Ketty poked her in the arm.

“Now that your cousin is engaged to Hollis, it’s time for you to start thinking about your prospects.”

Leelo blinked and turned her attention to her aunt, hoping she would attribute the color in her cheeks to the sun.

“You can’t be surprised. You’ll be eighteen soon, and you know how badly we need help around the house.”

“But surely with the Hardings...” She looked at her mother imploringly.

“There’s no rush,” Mama assured her. “Although of course we’d all like to see you happily settled someday.” She tucked a wayward daisy behind Leelo’s ear and smiled. “That’s what I want more than anything, my love.”

“I’m not saying she needs to get married right away,” Ketty said, handing her sister some bread and cheese. “But if she doesn’t even have someone in mind...”

Fiona grinned. “What makes you so sure she doesn’t?”

Leelo’s stomach, which had been full of butterflies only a moment ago, twisted in fear. Of course, her mother didn’t know whom she liked, just that she liked someone. She had been reminding Leelo of it lately, always fixing her hair or clothing before Leelo went out, even for Watcher duty. She’d made Leelo a new dress to wear for someone special, as she’d put it, with Leelo’s first corseted bodice and soft pink lace that had been carefully hand dyed.

Leelo had laughed at the implication, not wanting to deny her feelings too much; that would only make Mama more suspicious. But she’d never told her mother explicitly not to say anything to her aunt.

Ketty glanced meaningfully at Leelo. “I see. Is there something you want to tell me?”

“I—”

“About what?” Sage returned and dropped the full waterskins on the picnic blanket next to Leelo, oblivious to the tension radiating off her. She plunked down so close that she bumped Leelo’s thigh and reached for a strawberry, twirling it by the stem.

“Leelo has a secret romance,” Ketty said, her voice tinged with that tiny hint of suspicion she always had when it came to Leelo.