The Hired Girl(123)

The words stung. I did know. Ma always told me that it was the girl’s job to guard her virtue. And Father Horst always said the same: he called it purity, but he meant the same thing.

“She’s not as old as you think,” Mimi interjected. “She’s fourteen.”

It was as if the whole room caught its breath. Mr. Rosenbach’s mouth dropped open, and Mrs. Rosenbach’s hand flew to her throat. Malka’s eyes widened to such an extent her face looked like a skull. I gasped. “You read my diary!”

“Yes,” said Mimi, “and it’s a good thing I did, because you need someone to take up for you.” She raised her hands as if to ward off a blow, which was smart of her, because at that moment she was very close to being slapped. “I started reading it because you told Papa I needed glasses. I wanted to get back at you. But then I got interested, because you wrote about me. You said some mean things about me, but you said nice things, too, so I got more interested, and I read the whole thing. It’s the only book I ever liked, because it’s about real people, and I think,” she added, backing up hastily, “that you ought to be an authoress.” She glowered at David. “Then you kissed her and gave her presents and things —”

“You gave her presents?” echoed Mrs. Rosenbach, and Mr. Rosenbach yelled, “David!”

David looked baffled, as if he honestly couldn’t remember. Then he threw out his hands. “She wanted to draw! I gave her a stick of charcoal and a pad of paper! For the love of Mike, it wasn’t a diamond necklace!”

“Yes, but you flirted.” With a flourish, Mimi removed her glasses and pointed one earpiece at him. I was wild with mortification and grief, but I knew she’d perfected the flick of her wrist before a mirror. “You always flirt, and you don’t see that girls have feelings. You treated Janet to the opera, and you bought her a red umbrella”— there was a restless movement from Mrs. Rosenbach —“and you said things to her. Of course she liked it. And of course she fell for it, because Janet — only her real name’s Joan — is very romantic. It all comes of reading books. She used to have three books, and she read them over and over, but her father wouldn’t let her have any education and he burned them. So then poor Janet had to run away from home, and she never meant to lie about her age, but the lie slipped out, because she was afraid of sleeping in the streets. And David believed she was eighteen and started flirting and kissing her, and Janet thought she was as good as engaged. Maybe she ought to have known better — I’d have known better — but she’s only fourteen, and if you ask me, if anybody ought to be sent away, it’s David.”

Mr. Rosenbach lunged forward. I thought he was going to seize David by the shoulders and shake him. “Fourteen!” he bellowed. “First the Gratz girl, and now this poor little shiksa of fourteen! Why should I send you to Paris when I can’t trust you for one minute in Baltimore! Give me one good reason! You don’t think, you make a mess wherever you go, you are a disgrace to me in New York, in Baltimore, why should I send you —”

“No, no,” I cried, “he has to go to Paris!” I flew to Mr. Rosenbach and caught the sleeve of his dressing gown. “He has to! He’s an artist, maybe a genius! And you promised, Mr. Rosenbach. It wasn’t all his fault what happened, and it was good and kind of him to take me to the opera: I loved the opera, just because I’m a hired girl doesn’t mean I shouldn’t see the opera! And it was my idea to come here tonight, he didn’t know I was coming, and he did say that if he ever married, he wanted to marry a Jewess.” I ransacked my mind for some other plea and found it: the Jewish prayer that I first heard from Mr. Solomon’s lips. “Let no one be punished on my behalf!”

My voice rang in the silence. That moment, when I was taking up for David, was one of the moments when I was strong. When I look back on that terrible night, there is much that shames me, but it was true love that impelled me to plead for David, and I’m not ashamed of that. It’s a strange and piteous thing, because when I dreamed of true love, I dreamed of David loving me. But I was the one who loved truly. Knowing that, I can hold up my head, even though I made a fool of myself and my heart is broken.

Mr. Rosenbach opened his hands and said, “Freyda.” That was all he said: just his wife’s name, but he said it urgently, and I knew he was pleading for me.

David came forward and took my hands. As soon as he touched me, I went still. It was always like that between us. The lightest touch of his hand bewitched me, exciting every nerve in my body. “Janet, I’m sorry. I never once suspected you were so young.”