Tell Me You Crave Me (Search and Seduce #3)(13)

But her and that dress, and that need she was radiating, were too much to deny. Because Natalie had been needing a man. And that was something he couldn’t ignore.

He yanked open the bag of coffee, dumped a bunch into the filter, and stomped through the office to the back sink to fill the carafe. He hated that dress the whole way to and from the faucet, and he hated it even more as he jammed his thumb on the brew button.

It had been that damn dress last night. That was the culprit, together with her perfect curves, which were hard not to notice. Normally, she was covered in an apron. But damn she looked good. She was a beautiful woman, don’t get him wrong, but last night she just…

She’d needed a man.

Everything from her body language to the idiot she’d been with had told him what she’d wanted, and she was going to get it, even if that meant being reckless. He’d hoped to keep her safe. Instead he’d ended up being reckless with her.

Could he have been any more pathetic trying to keep it cool this morning? Of course she wouldn’t tell Matt. Not just for herself, but because that could ruin his lifelong friendship, not to mention the dynamic of the only family he’d ever known. Her family. Lord knew he’d never be good enough in Lemon-Anne’s eyes, and Natalie had to know that, too. She wouldn’t say anything, and neither would he. But what she had said was pricking his mind.

She wanted distance.

What the hell did that mean? He saw her all the time. And surely she couldn’t mean it in the way he meant it when he used it as part of some bullshit excuse to one of his one-night stands. No woman had ever wanted distance from him before.

He really was a son of a bitch. Or his ego was extra-sensitive today. No way in hell would he stand there and think about why he was so annoyed about this. And he sure as shit wasn’t going to go into mommy issues of abandonment, and commitment phobia. Lots of people had shitty parents. His had just happened to be one of the worst. He was lucky his mom had taken off when he was so young. Sure, seeing her passed out with blood running from her nose and foam from her mouth wasn’t exactly a pleasant memory. But there had only been a few times like that. And then she’d died so soon after.

He closed his eyes for a second and remembered the day he’d found out. He’d already been living with Matt and Natalie, but at that point, he’d assumed it was a temporary arrangement. Eventually, his mom would come back. Eventually, he’d return to living in that dark and empty house, his mom drunk or high or…

But she hadn’t come back. And as crushed as he’d been to hear that her addictions had finally gotten the best of her, his entire life had turned into one worth living when Natalie’s family had taken him in.

And now he’d betrayed their trust. His only saving grace was that he was never going to let them find out, and he was never going to let this happen again.

“Fuck this,” he muttered, and poured a cup of coffee. The drip wasn’t done, and when he removed the pot, it continued to pour and spilled onto the table. He shook his head and replaced the pot. He wasn’t thinking straight.

He needed to clear his mind, and fast. Because he couldn’t, and wouldn’t, deviate from the boundaries that kept him safe. Hell, the boundaries that kept Natalie safe, too. He’d seen the hurt in her eyes when he’d left her this morning. But f*ck, she knew as well as he did that last night had been a mistake.

A wonderful and terrible mistake he couldn’t stop thinking about.

Yep, I’m an *.

For once, he should have kept his dick in his pants. Hopefully Natalie would just move on, and so would he, and they’d go back to irritating each other, and this whole thing would fade away.

He adjusted his shoulders and felt the small welts left by her fingernails rubbing against the cotton of his shirt.

Fade away. Good plan.

“Hey, bro!” a happy voice came from behind him. Matt walked in and barreled toward him, big arms open.

Guilt gripped East’s gut, but he swallowed and hugged his best friend with his free arm. “Hey! I was wondering when you were getting into town.”

Matt hugged him so hard that East’s cup of coffee splashed and scalded his hand. He put the cup down and grabbed a napkin.

“Oh, sorry,” Matt said when he saw the spill.

“Don’t worry about it.” Honestly, a scalded hand was the least he deserved.

Matt frowned. “Shit, man, you’re getting banged up.” He pointed to East’s bicep. “You get into a sticker bush or something out on a mission?”

East looked at where Matt was pointing on his arm. Wouldn’t you know it? There were bright red scratches from the sexiest set of fingernails he’d ever had on him.

“Uh, yeah, sticker bush,” he said, shaking the memory off. “You’re looking pretty good for a groom-to-be,” he said, changing the subject from his appearance to Matt’s.

Matt glanced down at himself. “Yeah, the love of a good woman will do that.”

East kind of wanted to barf at that sap, but this was his best friend, so he’d let it slide. Also because Matt looked to be truly happy. He was in sharp clothes, his hair freshly cut. Not like he’d been before he met Bridget, back when jeans and a two-day beard had been his usual.

Kind of like how I still am.

“Thought I’d find you here.” He glanced around the small office. “Still rescuing the damsels?”