Take (Need #2)(36)

I love that thought. I really, really do.

Not that I’ll admit that to him. “That’s your opinion. I . . . ” My breath catches as the dildo slips fully in me and my hand presses into my clit.

“You what, Kira?” His breath races, faster, louder.

Closing my eyes, I let myself get lost in the visual of him thrusting into his fist while he hears me f*cking myself. “I beg to differ,” I whisper, lost in sensation.

“You do, do you?” The soft, implied deadliness in his voice. That barely leashed fury.

Why do I love it when he’s jealous? Why? “Uh-huh.” My legs shake harder.

“I’m going to ask you again, baby: is that why you’re thinking about my dick inside you right now?”

I want to hurt him.

Want to f*ck him.

God, I want him to keep talking but at the same time, I just want him to shut the f*ck up.

I hate when he reaches inside me, grasping at bitter truths I don’t want to acknowledge.

Brayden groans, and the sound is so blatantly sexual that I know he’s doing it on purpose again. Fucking with me. Proving once more the power he has over my body. “Slide it back in, Kira. No, only halfway, baby. Soft, shallow thrusts.”

It’s like he’s in the room, watching every move I make.

“Now slide it back out. Go slow. All the way to the tip.”

I do as he says, feeling my walls clench around the dildo. My body doesn’t want to let it go. It’s not Brayden, but with his voice in my ear, I can almost pretend it is.

“Don’t thrust it in, yet. Hold it there. Right at the tip.”

“No.” My head thrashes side to side. I want to disobey him. Slam the cock in my hand into me. “I need more.”

“Not . . . yet. Pulsate on the tip. I’m squeezing mine right now, imagining it’s your tight *.”

The way this man talks undoes me. A fresh wave of resentment floods me as I think about all the women who have had that cock in them, his sexy voice talking dirty in their ear.

I could have it if I wanted to take it.

But I hate him too much to give him that.

My chest convulses and a pained cry leaves me.

“Baby,” Brayden whispers in a sad tone.

“Let me f*ck myself.” Why am I not doing it? Why am I still obeying him?

“Not yet, Kitty. Just a little more.”

“It hurts,” I whine, aching.

“I know, baby. But I’m going to make it all better. I promise.”

“You can’t!” It boggles my mind that he can’t understand it. This heartbreak has become warped. Misshapen. It not longer even resembles heartbreak, but something more akin to trauma.

It’s unfixable.

I’m unfixable.

There’s no going back.

And yet my body is hungrier than ever, my soul grasping at the tattered connection between us.

“Kira, listen to me.”

“Please,” I beg, and there are tears in my eyes. I need him to make me come, to moan in my ear while the orgasm tears through me.

Then, I have to hang up the phone on him and sever this connection once more.

“Then do it. Slam it into you. Use all your strength like I would if I was there f*cking you with my cock.”

I do as he says, thrusting the dildo deep.

My back arches, body locked up. I’m coming so hard I can’t control the loud moans leaving me.

“Say my name, Kira. Say it!”

I do, repeatedly, my hips churning to meet each thrust.

“Oh God, baby. The way you say my name. You ready for me? Ready for my come?”

He’ll never know how f*cking much.

Brayden yells out. “Fuck, baby! Fuck, I love you.”

Pain.

Pleasure.

My soul grasps at the flimsy remnants of that connection again, trying to rebuild it somehow.

“I love you, Kira. I f*cking love you. So much. God, I need your *.”

I’m still coming as I hang up the phone on him, cutting off his rambling.

I’m still coming as that first tear slides out of my eye.

I yank the dildo out of me and jerk upright, throwing it away from me. Covering my face with my hands, I struggle to pull myself together.

Impossible. I’m torn apart.

Broken.

Exposed.

No. No. No. I’m not this girl anymore. I no longer fall apart for Brayden Hunt.

I’m stronger than this. I can’t go back to being that shattered little girl he left behind.

Sniffing, I wipe at my wet eyes and get up to continue getting ready. I can’t stop him from going to that party, but I won’t stop myself from going either.

I’ll just have to ignore him.

I will.

He snuck past some defenses the last few weeks. I wasn’t careful enough.

That’s over now.

I’m going to build those defenses back up.

And no matter what it costs me, I’m going to convince that man to move on and leave me alone. I’m going to make him believe he has no power over me.

Somehow.





I expected to get many reactions to my costume choice.

I expected wrong.

Reactions isn’t quite the right term for what’s happening.

The guys here are practically trying to grope me. As soon as I walk into the large foyer, all heads turn in my direction.