Sweet Forty-Two(26)

Normally Dr. Carver would walk me back down the hallway and into the visiting room. This time, however his statuesque figure remained rooted by his desk, and I took that as my cue to leave. I knew he was her doctor and not my friend, but with one movement of his hands into his white coat pockets, he drew his line in the sand. He wasn’t going to budge on his opinion of the ECT.

Neither was I.

Upon returning to the visiting room, I was thrown off balance by its emptiness. Not just the absence of other patients, but the absence of my mother.

“She got tired,” Daniel said as he waved to me from across the room. “She went to bed. This is her usual time.”

I ran a hand through my hair, tightening it at the back of my neck. “Of course. I’m so used to coming here when she wakes up around three in the morning ... I just lost track of what time of day it was.”

I remained in my lonely spot on the floor until a firm arm wrapped around my shoulders. “It’s okay, Georgia. It’s tiring. Go home and get some sleep. See you at three?”

I looked up at Daniel’s compassionate eyes, wondering how long he’d be able to hold onto that empathy. “Do you ever go home?”

“Sometimes.” He smiled and squeezed my shoulders. “I usually work doubles. No wife. No kids. Why not? I love working here.”

I could have given him about twenty years worth of “why nots”, but I just smiled back and made my way through the maze of secured doors and hallways until I was back in my car, resting my head on my steering wheel and begging to hit the bottom of this rabbit hole.





Regan

“That’s f*ckin’ awesome, dude. You’re going to love living with Georgia. She’s a trip.” CJ rummaged through Bo and Ember’s refrigerator. “Get your act together in the next couple of days and I can help you move in.”

“Thanks. I’m not moving in with her, CJ. It’s across from her. And, I expect your lazy ass to help me.” I shifted on the stool at the center island.

Ember set a plate topped with salad in front of me. “Wait, she stayed here last night? How did I miss that?”

“Because,” CJ spoke into the cheese drawer, “you were busy in siracha.”

I laughed as Ember scrunched her nose. “I was what?”

“You were in your headstand this morning.” I chuckled at CJ’s interpretation of Sanskrit.

“Oh.” She raised her eyebrow at CJ, indicating idiot. “Anyway, are you sure you want to do that? I mean, it seems like you’d have to deal with a lot of ... foot traffic.”

“What do you mean? It’s a residential spot, apart from the bakery that’s downstairs.” I reminded myself to ask Georgia again about that place.

Ember grumbled as CJ cluttered the island with a pound of meat and cheese, and other CJ-sandwich necessities, like mustard, mayo, and ketchup. Don’t ask.

“What I mean is, she seems like she’s pretty ... popular with the patrons at the bar.”

CJ slapped together a sandwich, took a bite, and responded with a mouth full of turkey. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

“Oh come on, guys,” Ember looked exasperated as she played with the strings on her hoodie, “each night we were there she left with a different guy, and was all over everyone else. Don’t you think it’s all a bit ... much?”

My stomach twisted as CJ’s eyes shot to Ember defensively. “First of all, princess, she’s an adult. Second of all, she doesn’t do anything different than I, or half the other guys at Finnegan’s do every weekend, so you don’t need to judge her.”

“I judge you,” Ember mumbled between bites of organic lettuce from her parents’ garden.

“And I judge you,” CJ shot back. “Seriously, what do you care what she does with her time?”

Ember dropped her fork onto her plate. “You want to know why? I’ve spent nearly five years working for a domestic violence organization. It doesn’t matter how much we want gender roles not to matter, CJ. They do. The fact is, Georgia is almost infinitely times more likely to get raped than you ever will be by behaving the same exact way you do. And, the fact that you encourage her makes you incredibly irresponsible. You call yourself a friend? I call you clueless.”

“Regan,” Ember turned to me before CJ could respond, “if you do take that apartment, promise me you’ll be careful, and that you’ll keep an eye out. For her.”

I swallowed a forkful of seeds, nodding as my throat constricted around Ember’s implications. I hadn’t, honestly, thought much about Georgia’s safety in her actions. I’d spent too much time thinking Ember was judging her, being a bitch because she perceived her as slutty. Maybe that was an impression I’d had, too.

It frustrated me that she behaved the way she did. She was beautiful, funny, charming, and badass. I didn’t know enough about her, and I wasn’t close enough to her, though, to suggest she lead her life any other way.

Looking up, I found CJ red-faced and holding his sandwich in mid-air, staring at Ember. “What makes you think she’s going to get raped?”

“It’s not what I think, CJ. I was just telling you statistics. When she behaves like that, it’s going to invite the wrong kind of guy one of these times. It doesn’t cross your mind, CJ, because you’re not like that. You’d never do that. But, unfortunately, not all guys are like you. And, when alcohol and/or drugs are involved, even more people get into trouble.”