Sweet Fall (Sweet Home #2)(51)

Lexington, give yourself to me. I will get you to your goal. Austin will love you when we have succeeded. Be awed by you. Do what you must and make sure no one suspects a thing. Secrecy is key. Dr. Lund will not be able to force you onto the scale as the pounds fall from your flesh. You are not his property to order about, nor his puppet to control. You belong to me and that is always the way it will be. Dr. Lund is an obstacle. He is a barrier to perfection…

As I stared at the painted girl in the mirror, tears filled my eyes at the truth of the eyesore before me.

I wasn’t worthy. I was severely lacking. There was no beauty queen staring back, no redeeming features on her plain and chubby face. Just too much fat engulfing her features and ugliness, ugliness there for everyone to see.

Resolved, I made my decision. I would do as the voice commanded, shed a few more pounds. With a few more pounds gone, I would stop. It wouldn’t go too far. No one would suspect a thing. It would be easy.

I couldn’t see another way.

It would be easy to stop…

Easy to stop…

Once I am thinner.





Chapter Sixteen

Lexi


“What do you mean you can’t fly?” Shelly Blair shrieked at me, and I heard Lyle whistle low from beside me.

“I’ve just got back from my physiotherapist and he insisted I cannot fly in the stunts, but I can still dance. My back can’t be touched due to a strained muscle. The landings of the stunts will be too much. But I can dance solo at the front of the squad.”

My lies tasted of vinegar as they poured easily out of my mouth, but I couldn’t bring myself to feel guilt.

Well done, Lexington. Do not let them touch your back. And never feel bad about lying. It is what you must do. You know this. What is one small lie on the road to perfection?

Straightening my back, I refocused on Shelly and said, “I’m sorry, Shelly, but that’s the way it is. There’s no other option.”

Shelly snarled, her perfectly rouged lip curling in annoyance. “Perfect! The SEC Championship is around the corner, then the National Championship, and my best flyer is down. This year is going to absolute shit!”

With that, Shelly stormed off to consult Tanya, the vice-captain, leaving me standing awkwardly in her wake.

“Lexi babe, you’re hurt? Why didn’t you say something to me?” Lyle said with a pout as he put his hand on my arm.

Shrugging, I stepped back out of his hold and folded my arms across my chest. “My back has been hurting for a while and, well, I got it checked and I have to take it easy for the rest of the season. But I can still be with the squad, just nothing too strenuous.”

Lyle pouted dramatically. “But you’re my flyer. I don’t want nobody else. It’s been you and me all season.” Making a circle with his index finger and thumb, he linked them through mine. “You’re my cheer-lobster.”

Guilt curdled in my stomach and, faking an endearing smile, I took hold of Lyle’s hand with my free hand and squeezed. “I’m sure you’ll survive.”

“Mmm…” he said with an exaggerated flick of his head and looked away, only to sigh heavily and glance my way once more. “There he goes again,” he said casually.

“There goes who?” I asked, looking in Lyle’s direction to see what held his attention.

“Austin Carillo, staring at you, again.” Lyle’s hand was still in mine. When I peered over to where the football team was practicing, Austin stood drinking a bottle of Gatorade, glaring at our hands.

He clearly didn’t like Lyle being my lobster.

The jealousy within Austin’s dark gaze ignited a fire within my stomach, and I cast him a small smile of appeasement. His head subtlety flicked in the direction of the table he was beside. I understood what he wanted—me to go to him… discreetly.

Pulling my hand from Lyle’s, I began walking away. Lyle shouted to my retreating back. “And where you going now, Lexi babe?”

“Need a drink!” I yelled back over my shoulder.

As I reached the table, I reached for a bottle of water and felt an almost unbearable heat suddenly radiate at my side. I looked down at the water in my hand, then pretended to glance over at the cheer squad practicing their new stunts… without me.

A part of me died inside. I was sacrificing my passion to lose weight… but I had to. I couldn’t bear them feeling all the fat on my back.

“That guy who was all over you likes cock, right?” Austin asked quietly, pulling me from my jealousy. He was right beside me, downing the rest of his blue Gatorade.

The question made me laugh, and I turned to face the stands as I unscrewed the top from my water bottle. “Erm… he’s gay, yes. Why? Are you jealous?” I teased, and then there was only silence.

Checking around me and making sure no one was watching us, I angled my body to face him. Austin was in his red Tide training shirt and shorts, picking at the label of his bottle, a scowl firmly on his face.

“You okay?” I asked and inched closer. As I inhaled, I could smell the sweat on Austin’s skin, the product of his sprints. But rather than being a put off, it drew me even closer. I… I… wanted him.

My eyes widened. I wanted a guy. But—

“I’m not used to feeling jealous, I suppose,” Austin admitted reluctantly.