Soulless Devil (Sons of Valentino #3)(40)

I’m… damaged.

When the doctor stopped by last night, I begged Luca to send him away. Just the thought of someone touching me sent me into a panic. He didn’t like doing it, but he did send the doctor home. I didn’t see much of Luca after that. Every now and then, he’d pop his head in the doorway to ask if I wanted anything. The answer was always no.

The only thing I want—no, the only person I want right now isn’t here. I was a fool to think that Romeo could be that person, the one I could lean on. My safety net. I know better than to rely on someone else. I’m an independent woman. I make my own choices.

Except I don’t always get to, do I? That has never been more evident than it is right now.

I slide off the bed and stand. I ache. Everywhere. Pushing through the pain, I tiptoe across the bedroom. Maybe I can sneak out of the house without Luca seeing. It will save the humiliation of being kicked out when Romeo does finally return. Opening the door, I realize my attempts at an escape are a no-go when Luca jumps to his feet from where he was sitting just outside the room.

“Do you need something?” he asks.

“Why are you on the floor out here?”

“I… I just wanted to be close, in case you needed something.” He shrugs his words off like they’re not a big deal. My eyes well up at his kindness. I was wary of Luca when I first met him. Now I’m starting to see behind the tough, playboy exterior he wears like a suit of armor.

“Thank you. But you didn’t need to do that.”

“Yeah, I did. Come on, I’ll get you some breakfast.”

“I’m not hungry,” I tell him, following him into the kitchen. I tried to eat last night. I really did. I just couldn’t stomach it.

“Liv, you didn’t eat anything yesterday. You need to eat. At least let me make you a smoothie.”

“Coffee?” I suggest instead.

“Deal.” He smiles as he turns on the coffee machine and grabs two mugs from the cabinets.

I do my best not to wince as I sit on the stool at the breakfast bar. Luca’s face tenses. He looks at me and then walks into the pantry, returning with a bottle of aspirin and placing it on the counter in front of me. He doesn’t say anything as he fills a glass of water and sets it beside the medication.

“Thank you,” I say quietly.

“You know, whoever did this to you, they’re not going to get away with it.”

“I can’t go to the police, Luca. If I do that, my dad will find out. My parents can’t know,” I plead, my voice desperate. I can hear it.

“I would never leave real justice to the cops, sweetheart. I just mean… we will find them and make sure they can’t do this to anyone else.”

Then it clicks. What he means. I can’t let them do that for me. “I don’t want that. I don’t want Romeo or you to do anything that will ruin your lives because of me.”

“That’s cute,” he says. “Are you really not going to tell your family? You need to tell someone. You need someone to talk to, Livvy.” He’s quick to change the subject.

“I can’t. It’s enough that you know. That Romeo knows, and now he’s…” I shut my mouth. I will not be that girl. I will not sound as pathetic as I feel. If Romeo wanted to be here, like he promised he did, then he would be.

“He what?” Luca asks.

“It doesn’t matter. I should probably go before he comes back anyway.” I open the aspirin bottle, remove two pills, and swallow them with the water.

“Why would you do that?” Luca questions, tilting his head slightly sideways at me.

“It’s obvious he doesn’t want me here, Luca. I appreciate you trying to spare my feelings but you don’t need to pretend,” I tell him, doing my best not to tear up.

“I don’t know what on earth gave you that idea, but you couldn’t be more wrong. If Romeo didn’t want you here, he never would have brought you here.”

“He left. He didn’t come back. People change their minds. It’s okay.” I stand from my seat. Wrong move. Everything hurts with the slightest action.

“Sit down. You’re not leaving. Romeo didn’t leave because he doesn’t want you here. He just needed space, time to clear his head. He hasn’t ever felt… well, you bring out a different side of him and he doesn’t really know how to deal with it. Seeing you like this, it fucking hurts him Livvy. It’s tearing him apart and he’s blaming himself for not being with you.”

I didn’t really consider that this would be hurting Romeo. The only thing I thought of was how disgusted he must be with me now. I don’t know him well enough to know how he’s feeling. We haven’t spoken about feelings all that much. “It’s not his fault. He didn’t do this to me. Those Russian men did. Romeo can’t shoulder the blame for someone else’s actions.”

Luca spins around, forgetting the coffee he was pouring. “What did you just say?” he asks, his voice suddenly feral. Lethal.

I’m taken aback by his tone. “It’s not his fault…” I repeat.

“No, the other bit. Who did this to you, Livvy?”

“I don’t know,” I tell him, honestly. Because I don’t.

“You just said they were Russian. How do you know they were Russian?” he presses.