Slow Dance in Purgatory(43)

Grabbing another mop, Maggie dug in, and she and Johnny mopped side by side without speaking for a considerable amount of time.

“What was Shad so upset about?” Johnny said after a while.

“Shad is a little weasel.” Maggie had not forgiven him yet. “He claims to be my friend! He claims to be more than my friend, yet he is constantly on my case.”

“He’s just worried about you.”

“Ha!” Maggie cried, mop in hand, hand on hip. “He is jealous and nasty!”

“He is jealous….but he’s worried about you too,” Johnny insisted, not breaking his rhythm.

“I don’t understand why he’s jealous! He has no claim to me, and he thinks he has it all figured out. What does he know, really?”

Maggie resumed mopping, angrily swiping at tiles that she had already cleaned.

“He does have it all figured out, Maggie. That’s why he’s acting the way he is.”

“Why are you defending him? And what does he possibly have to worry about, anyway?” Maggie suddenly felt like bursting into tears, and she blinked her eyes furiously, not wanting Johnny to see her cry.

“Maggie…Maggie, stop.” Johnny wrestled the mop from her hands and threw it. It landed perfectly upright next to the suds bucket and his mop, which were already neatly lined against the wall. Pulling her into his arms, he slid into a cafeteria chair and held her in his lap. Maggie collapsed against him with a snarly sigh.

“He is worried about you because you are acting like you are in love with a ghost.” Johnny forced her to meet his eyes.

“Well, I am,” Maggie said in a tight, small voice.

“Maggie – “Johnny moaned, resting his forehead on her shoulder. Her hands immediately shot up to smooth his hair.

“Maggie,” he tried again, sitting up. He slid his fingers between hers, bringing their joined hands to her lap. “You are walking around with your head in the clouds. People are starting to notice. Shad most of all. He’s heard people talk about you and laugh at you. It hurts him. It hurts me. It hurts me even worse to know I am the cause.”

Maggie rose from Johnny’s lap abruptly and took several steps from him, physically distancing herself from what he was saying. She could take the laughter; she could take the teasing and the ridicule, but she couldn’t take losing one more person that she loved. His words felt like good-bye, and she couldn’t take that most of all.

“I need to go.” Maggie retreated. She didn’t want to continue with this conversation, even if it meant cutting their time short.

“All right.” Johnny didn’t argue or beg her to stay, and that made her feel ten times worse. He walked up behind her and ran a hand down her smooth ponytail, wrapping it around his hand and using it to turn her around and pull her to him.

“Every moment with you has made the last fifty years worth it,” Johnny said with quiet intensity, and he lifted her chin and pressed his lips to hers, parting them softly. It was a kiss filled with both yearning and denial, a kiss that ended far too quickly.

“Goodnight, sweetheart.”

“Goodnight, Johnny,” Maggie whispered.

***

Maggie called for Johnny when she entered the school on Tuesday morning. The fact that she had to call at all was fair warning that he wouldn’t be joining her. He was usually there before she was completely through the door, as eager to greet her as she was to be greeted. She lifted her chin stubbornly. Fair enough. She had let her dancing slip since Johnny had begun to occupy her free time. She would shake some of the rust off this morning. Maggie danced relentlessly for an hour, pushing herself beyond fatigue and leaving the dance room exhausted but satiated and strangely content. Dancing had filled all her lonely, aching, spaces once more.

A few of the girls from the dance team were in the girls’ locker room when Maggie headed in to rinse off and get ready for school. She heard Dara Manning say something snide about her old shorts and ratty t-shirt, and Dara’s friends twittered and snickered in all the appropriate places. She ignored them wearily.

“Maggie?” Dara approached her and asked her if she had a spare tampon, all the while pretending she was crying.

One of Dara’s friends, right on cue, asked Dara if she was okay – Dara responded, still play-crying.

“It’s just so sad! Why aren’t there any happy endings? I really needed a tampon!”

Maggie walked away. She recognized her words from that embarrassing day in English class, and she really didn’t want to deal with Dara Manning’s crap; however, she realized suddenly that what Johnny had said was true. She had drawn the attention and ridicule of her classmates and her teammates. Had she been that unaware?

The next couple of days were carbon copies of Tuesday. Johnny was nowhere to be found. Maggie stopped calling to him, knowing that if he wanted to be with her, he would. It was all she could do not to throw a huge tantrum and demand he respond, but she was tougher than that, and she held on to her pride like a lifeline.

Just about the time everyone started to forget about her scandalous walk down Main Street, Shad’s mother got arrested for prostitution and drug possession. This wasn’t her first offense, and it looked like she was going to spend some time in jail. It happened late Tuesday night, and unfortunately, a member of the football team had heard the report called in over his dad’s police scanner. The whole school knew about the arrest by Wednesday afternoon, and since then, Shad had been the brunt of never ending jokes and had had to endure some pretty nasty innuendo. His spirits were as low as Maggie’s were.