Shut Out (Bayard Hockey #1)(19)

She outlines a model called Step In, with four specific steps that are actually pretty cool and could be helpful.

Whoa. I’m really getting into this. What is even happening to me?

Then we’re doing role-playing—which is kind of cheesy, but whatever. I’ve never been worried about making a fool of myself, so I throw myself into my role. There’s lots of laughing and yet people are taking it seriously and really trying.

This makes me feel good for Skylar. What she’s doing is amazing…and successful. Hell, she even sucked me in—Mr. Bad Attitude.

I’m both aware of her and protective of her. If anyone said or did anything not cool to her, you can bet I wouldn’t be standing by, I’d damn well be intervening, punching their lights out.

Yeah, punching isn’t one of the actual strategies, but I’m not afraid to throw down when it’s needed.

Huh. I don’t think I’ve ever felt protective of a girl before.

Skylar relates the bystander intervention back to consent and checking in to make sure that someone really is consenting. “It’s about respecting yourself and others,” she finishes.

We end our last session on Friday evening with a review pop quiz that is actually hilarious, with some multiple choice answers that are over the top, and Skylar and Grace summarize the training. Then we’re given information on the various groups within SAPAP we could volunteer for if we choose.

Back home, I wearily toss my messenger bag onto the floor in my room and throw myself down on the bed. But I can only lie there for a minute, energy burning through my veins. I need to go for a run.

I jump up and change into track pants and a T-shirt, then lace up my Nikes. In the kitchen, I pause to grab a bottle of water from the fridge. “Whoa, what’s with all the beer?”

“For the party tomorrow night,” Buck answers from his seat at the kitchen table, where he’s got a textbook cracked open.

“What party?”

“You said you were coming.” He narrows his eyes at me.

“Bullshit.”

“Yeah, you did, we talked about it this morning.”

“Christ, that was before I had coffee. You know I don’t function before caffeine.”

“A house party. You gotta come.”

“Why do you care about my social life?” Then I sigh. “You want me to drive again.”

“Nah, man. That’s against the code.”

Oh yeah. The mysterious Bears Bro Code.

“You drove last time, that means we owe you one,” he continues. “But not this time. It’s only a few blocks from here. We can walk.”

“Oh.” Well, if it’s only a few blocks, I can go for a while and slide out without anyone noticing. “Okay. I’m going for a run. Be back in an hour.”

“All right. We’re ordering pizza.”

“Sounds good.”

I fill my lungs with fresh fall air as my feet pound down the pavement. I’ve been using my runs to learn my way around campus and around town. Running is also a good way to work my body but also to empty my head. Today, I find myself thinking about some of the things we talked about in the training. But that’s not what I want to think about, so instead I think about hockey and do some visualization about how our first game is going to go.

I’m still trying to find my place on this team. Coach seems like a good guy. When he sat down with me, he was up-front about my past and that I’m being held to a high standard. But he was also enthusiastic about my hockey ability. I’ve enjoyed our practices so far. He’s tough and makes us work our asses off, but I already feel like I’ve learned a few things from him.

Back home, dripping sweat, I jump into the shower. Lately, showers are a time for a little yank and spank, and I lean against the wall as my soaped-up hand slides on my dick. Oh yeah…that feels so damn good…Dammit, who am I imagining? Skylar.

Why couldn’t I have just been a jerk and taken her up on her offer to go upstairs that night? She offered. She was as turned on as I was, and I don’t think I’m being an * when I say I know that. Neither of us was drunk, it could’ve been so good…even though we’d just met.

Pleasure pours through my body as my orgasm explodes, my body shuddering. The water washes away the evidence and I stand beneath the scalding hot shower for a long moment to catch my breath.

I sigh as I towel off. Naked, I walk from the bathroom to my room.

“Oh hey. Nice.”

The female voice stops me in my tracks.

I stare in horror at the girl who’s emerged from Rocket’s room. I lower the sweaty clothes clutched in my hands to cover my groin. “Sorry! Didn’t know anyone was here.”

She smiles. “Don’t apologize. That was totally my pleasure.” She waves a hand up and down toward me as I back into my room.

Damn.

I’m so used to walking around naked—in the dressing room and here—I never even thought there could be someone other than one of the guys around. Well, at least she liked what she saw.

In my room, I discover I’ve run out of clean clothes.

“What the f*ck,” I grumble as I shake out a T-shirt I pull from the hamper. I know this is gross, but what else can I do? I step into a pair of black sweats and head downstairs. No females are in sight, only Buck and Soupy opening the pizza boxes, which were just delivered.