Scandalized(45)

I bite back a smile at his earnest sincerity. “Okay.”

“You don’t have to answer right now, but I probably won’t get another chance today.”

“Okay.”

He leans in, and his lips are so close I feel them moving against the shell of my ear. “I think you should move into my suite for the remainder of my stay.” I feel a pop in my ears as my brain equilibrates. Alec pulls back, wide-eyed, gauging my reaction before leaning back in, moving on. “You can work from there. We won’t have to worry about press or moving back and forth. We can maximize the time we have left.”

“So that it can be even harder when you go?” I say unintentionally—the words just fly out of me, unattended.

Frowning, he looks back and forth between my eyes before dropping his focus to my lips. He licks his, like he’s thinking about how it would feel to press his mouth to mine, and instinctively, I lick mine, too.

“Well,” he says finally. “That’s why you don’t have to answer now. Just send me a text. If the answer is yes, I can give you a key.”



* * *



The cast is led out and the rest of us follow in a long, disorganized mob of hangers-on. Eden and I have no instruction as to where to stand or what we’re expected to do, but once we emerge out to the event space, I forget to be at all concerned with that. Because all I can focus on is the wall of sound, the sea of people.

The room is massive, filled with rows and rows and rows of seats, and there must be no fire marshal within shouting distance, because standing bodies line the side and back walls. At the front of the room is a long table with chairs for each of the invited guests, with name placards crisply propped on the white tablecloth. As the group files in and the West Midlands team find their seats, the room shakes with noise. It takes Trevor a good minute to get everyone to settle down so that he can make introductions. And after that, there is a short Q&A session before the signing.

None of the questions mean much to me; they are about previous seasons, or teaser tidbits for what’s coming up. One or two are personal in nature, even though fans were requested not to ask those. Is Ben dating that singer? He reminds the audience he’s married. Are Alexander and Elodie together in real life? They both give vaguely unconvincing answers, but I get it: the rumor keeps viewers locked in.

I focus less on listening to his answers than I do on noticing Alec’s easy manner in front of a crowd this size. I would be a fidgety, stammering mess; even when he’s answering something that seems impossibly intimate, he seems to slow down, settle into his spine. His deep, quiet voice takes on a sparkling, flirtatious edge.

He wants me to stay in his hotel room with him. Would that be insane? I’m already hungry for every second I can get with him, but watching him like this makes me feel like a greedy monster, plotting how I can sneak behind the table and drag his chair behind the BBC-Netflix curtain to put my hands all over him.

Just as I have this thought, a voice rises up from beside me. “This trip is a novelty for him.”

I look over, surprised to find Yael standing not two feet away. “I’m sorry?”

“Alexander.” She lifts her chin, indicating the man himself now welcoming the first group of fans at the signing table. “This trip isn’t how things usually are,” she says. “The time he has with you?” She looks at me, brows raised as if I might not know what she means. “He doesn’t generally have time for relationships.”

I rarely go mentally blank, but right now I have no idea what I’m supposed to say to this. “I’m sure he’s really busy.”

“He is.” She pauses and then delivers her thesis: “I don’t want you to have expectations, Georgia.”

Still at a loss for words, I can only give her a little nod so that she knows I’ve heard her. Expectations? I don’t know what that means. He just invited me to stay in his hotel with him for the rest of his trip. Maybe her first conversation should be with him, not me.

Yael walks away, leaving me staring at Alec as he leans in to hear a teenage fan better. He ducks down to her level, making eye contact. I know exactly what she feels right now with those warm brown eyes fixed right on hers: that teenager feels like the only person in this entire room. But for me, the room spins. Alec invited me here. Asked me to stay with him in his suite, and his assistant is telling me I should leave him alone. Of course I want to be near him, but I also want to do what’s best for him.

“Am I supposed to pretend I didn’t hear that?” Eden asks from my other side.

“No.”

She sucks in a breath through her teeth. “Ouch.”

“I don’t think I’ve done anything to indicate that I think this is going anywhere.”

“I think,” Eden says, “that she’s trying to tell you she’s worried Alexander Kim wants it to go somewhere.”

Digesting this, I watch him accept a handmade gift from a fan. A handler tries to take it, to put it in a box, but Alec shakes his head, wanting it with him on the table. “He asked me to come stay at the hotel with him.”

“Seriously?”

I nod.

“Are you going to?”

“I want to, but I think that’s the equivalent of sticking a hot skewer in my own heart in nine days.”