Say the Word(34)

I could see why. The plantation-style mansion he lived in was gorgeous — certainly fit for a senator’s family. It looked like something off the set of Gone With the Wind, with its grand-scale white columns and sprawling front lawn. The circular drive leading to the house wound around a huge fountain, and the freestanding car garage was larger than my entire house. On our way to the woods, we’d passed a bean-shaped, in-ground pool in the backyard, as well as a stable which, from the soft neighing sounds and wafting fresh-hay smell, I’d bet contained more than one thoroughbred. Though I hadn’t seen much beyond the kitchen, I could imagine the rest of the interior was equally extravagant.

And yet, for all its apparent wealth, the house was cold, impersonal. Like some museum exhibit where everything was warded with look-but-don’t-touch signs, encased behind glass panels, and cordoned off with red velvet ropes. It was probably as pristine and unlived-in as the day it had been constructed.

No wonder Sebastian hated it.

“Have you ever climbed it?” I asked gesturing up at the massive red oak. I was genuinely curious but also hoping to steer his mind to happier topics.

Bash grinned. “More times than I could count,” he told me.

“I’d like to see that sometime,” I said, grinning back at him happily.

“Come here.” His command was soft, his eyes beckoning with a gentle intensity. My feet responded instantly, drawn like the proverbial moth to his flame. When I came to a stop in front of him, he leaned forward into my space so only a hairsbreadth existed between our faces. His hands came up to cup my neck, then slid back to wind into my hair. With the lightest of pressure, he guided my mouth forward to brush against his.

His lips were softer than I’d expected, pushing against mine with gentle insistence. I bent into his frame, bringing my body flush with his. My lips parted and Sebastian deepened our kiss, the unfamiliar sensation of his tongue brushing mine nearly startling me off balance. My mind raced at twice its normal speed and I prayed I wasn’t messing this up, making a fool of myself.

“Is this okay?” he asked me softly, pulling away a fraction of an inch.

“More than okay,” I whispered back.

“Your heart is beating really fast,” Sebastian said, his right thumb skimming over the pulse point in my throat.

“I’m nervous,” I admitted.

“Don’t be nervous.” He leaned down to brush a featherlight kiss across my lips. “It’s just me.”

“That’s exactly why I’m nervous,” I pointed out.

He laughed lightly, wrapping his arms around me and drawing me in for a comforting hug that warmed me down to my bones. Without fully detangling our limbs, Sebastian walked me backwards until we were standing directly under the tree. Stepping out of my space, he sat with his back leaning against the thick trunk and extended one hand up to me.

“Come sit, Freckles.”

I sat next to him and within seconds he’d hooked one arm under my knees and swung them across his lap so I was settled on top of him. My head landed on his shoulder, and one of my arms curled naturally around his waist. I sighed contentedly when Bash’s lips pressed against the hair on the crown of my head.

We sat for a long time, the prince and his pauper, sharing a moment beneath the most beautiful tree I’d ever seen. I could only imagine what it would be like in a few weeks, when spring arrived and it was once again full of lush green foliage.

“Lux?” Sebastian asked, his arms tightening around me slightly.

“Yeah?”

“What’s wrong with Jamie?” He turned me in his arms so he could look into my eyes. “It’s cancer, isn’t it?”

“Yeah.” I swallowed roughly.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked, it’s just—” He broke off and took a deep breath that shifted my whole body. “I really like Jamie.”

“He likes you too.”

“Will he get better?” His question — the question, the one people were always terrified to ask and I was even more terrified to answer — hung in the air between us.

I was silent for a long time, trying to breathe normally.

“I don’t know,” I whispered eventually. “I hope so. We take it one day at a time.”

Sebastian’s arms hugged me tighter. “Is there anything I can do?”

“Keep visiting. Keep talking football and messing around with him. Keep treating him like he’s a normal seventeen-year-old boy, who’s not dyi—” My voice cracked on the word. “Who’s not sick,” I amended. I felt my eyes fill with unshed tears, and Sebastian leaned in to kiss my forehead gently.

“Keep being you,” I whispered.

“I think I can do that,” he whispered back.

Pushing aside all the worries that I’d screw it up or move too fast, I turned in his arms, followed my instincts, and brushed a light kiss across his lips. He kissed me back gently, as though I might shatter right there in his arms if he were to apply too much pressure.

And for a moment — for one blissful, perfect, sun-dappled moment in the arms of a boy I barely knew — I didn’t feel so alone.





Chapter Thirteen





Now


Simon and Fae were smashed.