Saugatuck Summer (Saugatuck, #1)(85)

Mom wants me to come to Ann Arbor Fri, she answered. Will try to get there Sat.

That Saturday I was working in the storeroom of the gallery, stupidly, stupidly content and unwary, when she stormed in.

“You *!”

Next thing I knew, I was on the floor seeing stars and wondering if she’d broken my jaw. Fuck, who knew she packed such a right hook?

Robin immediately rushed in and tried to subdue her, but I stared at her in resignation and waved him off.

“Don’t. Don’t, Robin. It’s okay. I’ve earned this. Just—can you close the door so we don’t disturb anyone who comes in to browse? She won’t damage the inventory, promise.”

“It’s not the inventory I’m worried about,” he said tightly. “Whatever your reasons, Morgan, if you assault him again, I’m calling the cops, got it?”

She gave him a jerky, resentful nod, and he left, closing the door behind him. Then she went back to glaring at me. I looked back, not even bothering to pick myself up off the floor.

How had I let myself get so complacent that I’d forgotten there still needed to be an accounting for what I’d done back in June?

“Don’t even think about telling me you’re sorry, you f*cking dick,” she finally grated.

“I am, but I won’t.” I straightened up, though I remained seated on the floor, my knees drawn up in front of me. “Your dad told your mom?”

“Not about you, no.” She crossed her arms over her chest. “He came out to her as bisexual, admitted to having an affair. He said that it might be better if they separated while he tried to figure out what that meant for him, but that he wouldn’t blame her if she would rather just get divorced.”

“Ah.” I rubbed my jaw again, Damn, but that hurt.

I admit, I had started to think Brendan didn’t have the balls to do it. I couldn’t help but be a little proud of him, whatever the fallout might be for me now.

Her eyes gleamed with tears as she stared at me bitterly. “The f*cking galling thing is, I didn’t put it together, even after Mom told me he’d had an affair with a guy. There I was with that factoid in one hand and your f*cking guilt-ridden confession about an affair with a married man in the other, and I was totally in denial.” She sneered at me. “I spent the drive from Ann Arbor to Lansing thinking, No way. Topher would never do that to me. I figured what had happened was that after spending a couple months around you, Dad had some sort of revelation about himself, right? But then I got to his house and right there in his office, he had those goddamn paintings of you!”

“He what?” Oh shit. I was gonna puke. I was gonna puke. I put my head down, sucking in desperate breaths as a cold sweat prickled over my body and my head spun. I hated to say it, but for a moment Mo was not my first consideration. Seriously, what the f*ck? “Oh no. Oh nonono . . .”

I was pulled out of my horror when her voice cracked.

“Goddamn it, Topher, why didn’t you tell me? Why did you confess everything except that part? Why did you let me go on believing you were my friend when you’d—”

“I wanted to, Mo. I wanted to tell you everything. I didn’t want to lie.”

“Oh right! You know, I seem to recall standing there while you were spilling your guts, and somehow Dad’s name never came up. Don’t tell me you didn’t have the f*cking opportunity!”

“I know, but there were all those people there, and you just don’t go around outing someone like that . . .”

“Yeah, well you just don’t go around f*cking your best friend’s dad either, you prick!” For a moment I thought she was going to hit me again, but she pulled it back. “That’s a f*cking convenient sense of ethics you’ve got going on there, girlfriend.”

I winced at the disgust in her voice. She loomed above me, completely righteous, completely justified, and I couldn’t muster a single defense. I didn’t want to. I wasn’t going to try to rationalize what I’d done, because it wasn’t rational. I’d already told her back on the Fourth how horrible I felt about the whole thing, how wrong I knew it was and how little forgiveness I deserved. She knew all that already. She just hadn’t known it was about her at the time.

She had every right in the world to hate me. I wasn’t even going to try to take that from her.

Silent moments, filled with rage on her part and shame on mine, pressed in on us. Finally she turned on her heel and stalked out, tossing over her shoulder, “Don’t even f*cking think about ever talking to me again.”

And that was how I lost my best friend.



“I can be there in three hours,” Jace offered when I called him to tell him what had happened.

“No.” I held an ice pack to my bruised jaw. “I had this coming. I just have to take my medicine. I think I’ll spend the weekend brooding about what a shitty friend I am and mourning the loss of the friendship. I might have Ben & Jerry over to keep me company. Or maybe Ernest and Julio Gallo.”

“Hey, no threesomes unless I get to watch.”

I started to laugh, then winced. “Ow. No more jokes.”

“Sorry. Okay.” He sighed into his phone, the breath crackling in my ear. “You sure you’re all right?”

“Yeah.”