RoomHate(23)
“I think she did.”
“I had no intention of coming here and trying to make amends with you.”
“No…really? I didn’t catch on.” When he cracked a slight smile, I asked, “Do you still feel the same?”
“Things don’t change overnight. We talked. That’s not gonna erase years of shit that happened. We’re not going to just be able to magically be best friends again.”
“I never expected that.” Playing with the remnants of my food, I thought long and hard before speaking again. “I’m just gonna say one last thing. And then I promise I won’t harp on it anymore.”
“I wouldn’t put money on that.” When his mouth curved into another smile, it was enough to give me the confidence to spill my guts one last time.
“I will probably spend the rest of my life wondering what would have happened if I hadn’t run away, if I’d just put my fear aside and told you everything I was feeling. You told me tonight that you were in love with me back then. I truly didn’t know that, Justin, but I wish I had. I really had no clue you felt that way. I need you to know that I loved you, too. I just had a really shitty way of showing it. And to think that you spent all of these years hating me. I just want you to be happy. If being around me makes you angry or stressed, then I don’t want to force anything, and if that’s the case, maybe it is best that we keep our distance. But if there’s a chance that we can truly be friends again, I would want nothing more. And I’m not stupid. Of course, I know it won’t happen overnight. That’s it. I won’t say anything else about it.” I got up from the table and put my plate in the dishwasher. “Thank you for dinner and for talking to me. I’m gonna turn in early.”
Just as my foot hit the first step to go upstairs, his voice stopped me. “I never hated you. I couldn’t hate you if I tried. Believe me, I have tried.”
Turning around and smiling, I said, “Good to know.”
“Good night, Payne in my ass.”
“Good night, Justin.”
CHAPTER 7
Two days later, I was having my morning coffee when a text notification lit up my phone. It was from Dr. Will Danger.
How about dinner tomorrow night?
I pondered my reply. It would probably do me some good to take advantage of a distraction from Justin. Since our talk the other night, things had been more cordial between us. At least he was no longer avoiding me. After he performed last night, we actually drove home from Sandy’s together. It was a quiet ride, but it was a step in the right direction. So, things were as good as they could have been.
The problem was me. I still couldn’t curb my attraction to him and didn’t know where to draw the line on my emotions. I thought about him every second of the day. We’d be going our separate ways soon, not to mention the not so insignificant detail of his committed relationship with Jade. I would never do anything intentionally to jeopardize that. But I still couldn’t control my feelings.
My fingers forced out a response to Will.
Tomorrow night sounds great. Just let me know what time.
Justin’s deep morning voice startled me. “I see you made coffee fusion.”
I jumped, quickly putting down the phone.
He snickered. “Oh. Did I interrupt something? You texting a boy?”
“No.”
He glared at me suspiciously. “Liar.”
A nervous laugh escaped me. “Want some coffee?”
“Trying to change the subject?”
“Maybe.”
“So, who was it?”
“Will.”
“Dr. Danger?”
“Yes.”
“Ever heard of stranger danger?”
“Yes.”
“They created that term about him.”
“Oh yeah?”
“I’m pretty sure. Yeah.” He poured himself a mug of coffee and turned to me again. “Seriously? Dr. Cheeseball? You’re gonna go out with him?”
Nodding, I said, “Tomorrow night. What’s your problem with him anyway?”
“He’s disrespectful.”
“In what way?”
“That guy was eye f*cking you before he even confirmed we weren’t together.”
“Maybe he’s just perceptive.”
“How?”
“He sensed your disdain toward me. It was quite obvious.”
“Where’s he taking you?”
“I don’t know yet.”
“You should find out.”
“What does it matter?”
“In case you go missing, I’ll know where to tell the police to start looking.”
***
Evening rolled around, and I had absolutely no clue what to wear. Will said he was taking me to this restaurant on the water in nearby Tiverton. It was going to be a humid night, so I opted for a lightweight floral tube dress that I’d bought one afternoon while out shopping with Jade earlier this summer.
I could hear Justin panting from down the hall.
Not again.
I didn’t dare go over there to assess the situation after what happened the last time I found myself witness to that jerk-off jamboree. After several minutes, what sounded like punching was added into the mix. I broke my vow to stay out of it and marched out of my room to check things out.