Reckless Hearts (Oak Harbor #2)(51)

“Put you . . .” I echo, staring at her in disbelief. “Who the hell do you think was paying for that fancy apartment, all those trips? I was working for our future together, the life you wanted. At least, I thought you did.”

“I did. I still do!!” Helena insists, tearful. She comes closer, grabbing my hands, trying to make me look at her. “It was a mistake, I promise, it’ll never happen again. I’ll do whatever it takes to fix this. We can go to therapy, baby, whatever you want. But we have to fix it, William. This is our future. You can’t just give up on us.”

I look at her, and just as quickly as it came, my anger fades away. I spent years of my life with this woman, but standing here, she’s a stranger to me now.

“I already did,” I answer, pulling away. “It’s over. We could talk about it forever, and it still wouldn’t change a thing. I don’t love you, and I never will again.”

I’m not saying it to be cruel, even though I used to imagine a hundred ways to make her pay. It’s simply the truth.

I don’t love her anymore, and the love we did have . . . it’s nothing compared to what I know love can be like now.

Helena’s face changes. “Is this about her? That Delilah girl?”

“No,” I tell her honestly. “You broke us all on your own.”

I left this part of my life dead and buried back in New York City. But what I risk losing now, that’s something else, something far more precious than I could ever have imagined. I hurry down the steps and across the yard.

“Wait, Will!” Helena’s voice cracks. “Where are you going?”

“Where I’m supposed to be.” I wrench my truck door open.

“But, what about me?” Helena swallows, the truth dawning in her eyes. There’ll be no dramatic reunion, no happy ending to our broken, used-up story. “You can’t just leave me here! This place is practically derelict, and there are no cabs for like, fifty miles!”

“Do whatever you want.” I reply shortly. “Stay here for the night. I won’t.”

I drive away before she can argue, leaving her stranded there on the porch. I’m not worried. Helena can take care of herself, even if she loves to pretend otherwise. If I’m honest, I even liked that about her: I felt needed, like I was the center of her world. She had a way of making you feel like the most important guy in the room, that just walking in with her on my arm marked me out as special, a guy who’d really made it.

I know, it’s bullshit. We were building the fa?ade of a real relationship, with nothing deep down beneath the surface. And the longer I spent with her, the more I felt like that—empty inside. She was perfect, we both belonged together, everyone said, so what was wrong? I tried my best to do all the right things, shower her with gifts and trips and everything else you’re supposed to, but it was like acting a role, reading lines that don’t mean a thing. I was so damn stuck, I couldn’t see a way out: going through the motions at work, then stepping into a whole new performance at home. Looking back now, I can see, we were heading off the edge of a cliff, and the only question was, would I wake up in time to see the fall?

And now I’ve made the same mistake all over again: buried my head in the sand and avoided the truth until it’s too late to change a thing.

Please don’t let it be too late.

I pull up outside Delilah’s, my heart thundering with panic now. She has to listen, she has to give me a chance to explain. I stride up the front path and ring the bell.

Silence.

I knock, louder. “Delilah?” I call. “Dee, please, you’ve got to let me explain!”

The door suddenly flies open, and then she’s standing there, but it’s not her. Not really. There’s no hint of laughter in her eyes, no teasing grin on her sweet lips. She stares at me icily, her arms folded tight across her chest.

“Dee, thank god. It’s not like Helena made it sound,” I tell her, praying I can make this right. If she can just give me a chance to explain, maybe I can fix this. I have to fix this. “We broke up, before I even met you. She’s the one who cheated on me. It was over, I swear.”

Delilah lets out a breath that almost looks like relief, and my hopes rise. Maybe it’s not too late. Then she looks at me with heartbreak in her eyes.

“But you didn’t tell me. Not one single word.”

The quiet disappointment of her voice cuts right through me.

“Because it was all in the past.” I try to find the words to explain. How she was my new beginning and my saving grace all at once, that I never knew what love could be like until she pressed her lips against mine that rainy night and I realized everything I’d been looking for was real: right there in front of me, so beautiful and bright and full of life there was never any turning back. I changed my life because of her, I found the person I wanted to be. But as my mind races to tell her everything, Delilah is already stepping back, her face set.

“You can keep whatever secrets you want, Will. It’s your choice. And I can choose for this to be done.”

The door slams in my face, and I realize, I’ve just ruined everything. I had it all, everything I ever wanted, but this is a mistake I can never take back.





Eighteen.


Delilah



He has a fiancée.