Reckless Abandon (November Blue, #2)(36)

“What’s up, Mon?” I yawn.

“Josh and the guys want to know if you can come back down here. They haven’t left yet and got some idea for a song.” She sounds

bored.

“Yeah, I’ll be there in a few.” I click “End” and stretch out across my mattress.

“Where you going?” Adrian asks.

“The guys want me to go back down to Finnegan’s to try something out for our set this weekend. This is our last time to practice

till then. Wanna come?” I slide back into my clothes and pull my sex-hair into an overly messy bun.

“Sure. I love when you do that to your hair. What’s that?” Adrian kisses me once before getting dressed, nodding to the

composition notebook I’ve picked up.

“My music comp notebook for lyrics, notes, whatever.” I shrug.

“Isn’t that the one Cavanaugh gave you?”

“Yeah, it’s my only one. Wait, does that bother you?” I watch a crease form between his eyebrows.

“No, but I figured it would bother you.” I don’t think I believe him as I watch his eyes search for anything else to focus on.

“I haven’t had a chance to get to a good music store. I’ll get one Saturday morning in Boston before I head back here.” I throw

the notebook in my messenger bag and head for the door, ignoring the screams from my heart to hold on. Hold on? To what?

We can’t escape Monica’s almost-glare as we walk into Finnegan’s five minutes later.

“What’s up, guys? Where’s C.J.?” I ask as I head directly for the stage.

“We just wanted to try this fiddled-up version of “Foolish Games” by Jewel.” There’s no percussion in that song,” Josh says

as he hands me a sheet with lyrics on it. I stop him.

“I know the words, Josh.” I chuckle. “All girls know the words to this song.”

“All right,” Regan chimes in, “here we go ...”

He slides the bow across his fiddle slowly, creating a chilling intro that sends goosebumps down my spine. Josh’s fingers strum

notes on the guitar where a piano is in the original version. Monica ignores Adrian as he sits next to her, and I ignore both of

them as I perch on the stool—giving myself over to the song.

I open my throat as wide as possible to keep up with Regan’s fiddling and Jewel’s intentions for the song. It feels good, until

we near the end. Josh, Regan, and I seem to intuitively slow down in time over these words and I close my eyes as tight as they’ll

go.

I sing the last three words of the second verse extra slow, and take a deep breath at the end; the guys do too. The silence feels

longer in my head, I’m sure. I force my throat to reopen, and I finish the song with my eyes still closed.

“Jesus Christ, Ember, that was awesome.” Josh stares at me slack-jawed as Regan nods.

“Yeah, November, you were meant to sing with a fiddle.” Regan squeezes my shoulder and puts his fiddle in the case.

I can’t bring myself to look up. I can’t look at Monica. I’m sure she knows what I was thinking—what I was feeling.

“Ember, I gotta take this call outside, K?” Adrian holds up his phone and I nod, returning my gaze to the floor.

“You don’t sing for him.” Regan blurts out as Adrian leaves the bar.

“What? Who?” I ask, startled back to the present.

He lifts his chin to the door. “Your boyfriend.”

“Adrian’s not my boyfriend.” I slide off the stool and square off to Regan.

“Whatever. Either way, you don’t sing for him. If you did, your eyes wouldn’t have been closed the entire time.” He walks over

to me and taps my forehead with his index finger. “Who you singing for, Beautiful?”

“Me.” I shrug as I feel heat betray my face.

“Ha! OK. Whatever you say. Just don’t stop singing for “you” then, OK? That was perfection.” He walks his suddenly cocky self

over to the bar and pours himself a beer.

I look to Josh. It’s my turn to look shocked. “Did you hear that?” I ask incredulously.

Josh shrugs and puts his guitar in its case, seeming to have gone mute. I turn to Monica who holds up her hands in defense.

“I’m not getting into this with you, Harris. I heard what he said, and I agree with him.” She tilts her head to the side, daring

me to challenge her. Challenge accepted.

“You agree with him? About what, exactly?” I hop off the stage.

“The look on your face, that was all Bo. You forget, I’ve seen you with him more than anyone here, but Regan picked up on it

after one song.” Her face doesn’t even get red. She’s confident and unwavering.

“So you think I’m still singing for someone who broke my heart?” My volume increases, causing the guys to turn toward us.

“Oh for the love of God, Ember, would you listen to yourself? Bo was in a mess of shit, and all you can think about is how it made

you feel.” Here it is, the first time Monica and I are talking about what happened in Concord.

“Jesus, Mon, go ahead—tell me how you really feel.” I put my hands on my hips, waiting for her response as Adrian reenters the