Protege(34)

“Yes . . . Jude.”

His gaze held her a moment longer until he broke their stare. As she took the steps she was short of breath, but not from exertion. There was something about this place that left her out of sorts, as if under a spell. Put a man like Jude Duval in the mix, with his charm and stature and irrefutable authority, and she was done—a puddle of girlish mush.

Her misgivings were slowly fading. It was impressive that such comfort with her surroundings could occur so swiftly. They’d only arrived yesterday afternoon. As much as she wanted to believe it was the beautiful home and charming atmosphere, she knew a large part of her ease was a result of Jude. Though he could be rough, there was an undeniable gentleness about him that drew her in. Somehow he balanced his tender mannerisms with unarguable authority.

When she had replaced her stockings and used the bathroom, she returned downstairs. Jude was on the phone, which gave her enough time to clean up the dishes from breakfast. She reminded herself, again, to ask if pork would be okay for dinner.

“You work fast.”

She spun and laughed. “You snuck up on me.”

“Are you ready?”

Removing the apron, she nodded. “Yes, but before we go, there are pork chops in the fridge. Would you like me to make them for dinner tonight?”

His hand lifted to her chin, his thumb running lightly over her lower lip. “It’s very good of you to ask, but I’m afraid I’ve agreed to have dinner at Ezra’s tonight. Lea and some of the other women will be there. They’re looking forward to meeting you. You can make the chops tomorrow night.”

“Okay.” The way he stared at her, he could have asked her to serve up her kidneys, and she would have agreed. It made it easier to shelf the twinge of anxiety that came with the expectation of meeting the people she’d briefly been exposed to the previous evening.

Breathtaking did not accurately describe the grounds of Fernweh. Lush green lawns carved around stone fixtures and man-made ponds. Jude showed her where the baby geese played, and she hoped to return with a bag of bread for them.

Across the footbridge was a garden. Though nothing was in bloom yet, she hoped she’d catch a glimpse of the perennials during her time there.

She hadn’t known what to expect, because everyone was so discreet regarding Fernweh. She was beginning to understand. The chateau was Jude’s and Jude’s alone, but the neighboring homes were full of people who lived in accordance with Fernweh’s mission.

“Every couple’s different. I can’t go into detail, because that would breach their privacy. As you come to know them, you’ll see what I mean. Some believe in polyamorous marriages, others swing. We’re a very tolerant people, which is why we value the sanctuary we’ve created here.”

“Polyamorous, as in—”

“More than one partner.”

“Oh my.”

“It’s not for everyone.”

Was it for him? She stepped under the brush of a willow tree as he held a gate open. “Have you ever been in a relationship like that?”

“No. I’m not one to share what’s mine.”

“Oh.” She couldn’t decide if this detail was a relief or a disappointment.

“You’ll still be shared; however, I’m merely sponsoring you. It’s important you experience it to determine how it makes you feel. I’m aware it was checked off in your application, so don’t worry that my preferences will hinder your experiences in any way.”

Because she wasn’t truly his. Strange, how much that reminder was starting to bother her. How did he remove himself like that? “But you don’t like it.”

What if she didn’t like it? The idea of being touched by more than one man, worshipped, had undeniable erotic appeal. But when she and Jude were progressing as intimately as they were now, it seemed wrong to entertain such fantasies. They were temporary, so it was silly to deny herself an experience on his account, especially when he had no issue with seeing her with another man. Clearly, she was only his protégé, nothing more.

“This isn’t about me. It’s about determining your sexual preferences.” And the point was driven home—she was merely a temporary blip on his radar.

She disliked feeling like she was a job to be checked off, but she also appreciated him doing something that typically went against his nature in order to enlighten her. The actuality of doing such a thing, however, was overwhelming. She blew out a long breath. “I can’t think about that right now.”

“Does it excite you, the thought of having multiple men pleasuring you at once?”

His curiosity struck her as genuine, and she wondered why he was asking. Was he keeping some sort of personal score? Estimating their compatibility?

No matter how much she tried to entertain the fantasy in that peaceful moment, she couldn’t think in terms of multiples. Her mind didn’t work past two. Yet there was that twinge of temptation pulling her toward something universally taboo. “Yes, but mostly because it scares me.”

“I wouldn’t let anyone hurt you, peach.”

She was growing fond of the nickname he’d chosen for her, liked the sense of closeness it provoked—imagined or otherwise. “Thank you, Jude. I believe you.” After a brief pause, she brazenly slipped her hand into his, relieved when he allowed the contact.