Playing With Fire (Tangled in Texas, #2)(100)
“No, not just that. I…” He closed his eyes and breathed out slowly, gearing himself to say something he obviously dreaded. “I save people for a living. It’s what I do. But I…couldn’t save you. And to make it worse, the whole thing with Mandy was my fault.”
“Your fault?”
“Before I saw you in the library that first night, I…I flirted with her. No more than I did with other girls, but I hadn’t realized she was unstable and had taken any of it seriously.”
“So you’re saying you and Mandy were sleeping—”
“No. Of course not. Nothing ever came of it, but she got the wrong idea about me because I let her get the wrong idea. Just like everyone else around here.” He shook his head. “No one takes a playboy seriously. And my behavior with the women in this town hasn’t encouraged it. I’m sorry, sweetheart, but this was all my fault. I was doing what I thought was best…for you. To end things and let you move on without me.” He glanced behind him at the boxes stacked everywhere before his eyes landed back on me and he frowned. “But I don’t want you to leave. Damn it, Anna, I can’t lose you.”
Slack-jawed, I stood motionless and stared at him in silence for a full thirty seconds, waiting for a declaration of love or at the very least an honorable mention in the like department. But it didn’t come. As the realization sank in that he might never admit his feelings for me, I only blinked at him, which apparently wasn’t the reaction he expected.
He shifted his weight and sighed with annoyance. “Gonna leave me hanging or are you going to say something?”
“I…um…I’m not leaving,” I managed to say, watching the worry melt from his eyes. “Those boxes are filled with books I’m donating to the library.”
“Oh, thank God,” he said, the tension in his shoulders loosening. “When I saw them loading boxes into your car…well, you scared the hell out of me. I thought I’d lost you for good.” Then he opened his arms to me.
But I didn’t move into them. Even though I knew the truth, nothing had changed.
“So you think you can treat me like I’m nothing to you, then waltz in here with an apology? And then what? I’m supposed to just forgive you and get over it?” I scoffed under my breath. “No way in hell.”
He dropped his arms to his sides. “Anna, I already told you why—”
“I don’t care. Not only did you hurt me, but you embarrassed me. Made me feel bad about myself, as well as our relationship. And it was so easy for you. Then again, everything comes easy for you, right? Well, not this time,” I said, starting past him.
Cowboy snagged me by the arm and raised a brow. “Are you saying you don’t want me?”
“No, actually you said you didn’t want me, remember?” I glared at him and even took it one step further. “I wouldn’t want to bore you again, so we should probably keep things casual and see how it goes. Don’t worry, though. If I’m feeling frisky, I’ll give you a call. But only if my bed isn’t already occupied by someone else.”
His eyes narrowed and his grip tightened. “You don’t mean that.”
“Sure I do,” I said, punctuating my indifference with a simple shrug. “After all, you’re no Prince Charming. I wouldn’t want you to get any wrong ideas about me falling in love with you. I guess I am grateful to you for teaching me how to make love, though. I can’t wait to practice some more.”
The insult must’ve hit home because Cowboy released my arm and said, “You want to wait around for Prince f*cking Charming, then that’s fine by me!” He turned and stormed out the front door.
The bottom dropped out of my stomach, and I stood there blinking like an idiot. Oh, no! What have I done? But by the time I came to my senses and made it to the door, he’d already slammed his truck door closed and was roaring out of my yard without even looking back. I swayed unsteadily in the doorway as my heart ripped apart at the seams.
I had only meant to show him how it felt to be tossed aside. How much it hurt for the person you loved not to love you back. But it all backfired and blew up in my face. Tears stung my eyes, but I refused to let them fall. My fairytale romance was over.
So much for happily ever after.
Thank goodness Bobbie Jo had been there when Cowboy ran out on me. I’d needed the comfort of a good friend. And she was, indeed. Not the least bit fooled by my silence, she made me some chamomile tea to soothe my broken heart.
She handed me a steaming cup. “I don’t understand Cowboy. I only let him inside to talk to you because I thought he was here to fix things with you.” She shook her head in disgust. “Now I’m going to have to kill him.”
“No, Bobbie Jo, it was my fault,” I told her, twisting my fingers together. “He tried. Really, he did.” Unshed tears clogged my throat, but I managed to rasp out the rest. “I guess I wanted to give him a dose of his own medicine and show him how much he had hurt me. It didn’t work out quite how I thought it would.”
“He’s a big boy. If he wanted to fight for you, then he should’ve stayed and done so.” Bobbie Jo frowned as she looked to be pondering something. “I hate to even say it, but the one thing I’ve learned from dealing with Jeremy is that some relationships aren’t…”