Picking Up the Pieces (Pieces, #2)(68)

“Oh, my God, Lily, I totally forgot you were here.”

I smiled. “I really shouldn’t be. Congratulations you guys. I’m just . . . I’m so happy for you both. I’ll let you guys have your privacy.”

Amanda pulled slightly away from Shane as she asked, “Are you coming home tonight?”

Even during one of the most important events of her life, Amanda couldn’t help but let her suspicion get the better of her. She knew I wasn’t going out with Adam tonight, since I had told her as much when we’d talked earlier, and this was her way of asking who I was seeing tonight. She’d been subtly probing me for information about Max ever since the hockey game. I felt bad that I still hadn’t come clean to her, but I just couldn’t. I wasn’t ready to make her understand why I was seeing him again. I didn’t even know why I was seeing him again. Our meeting at the game had been a chance encounter, but I couldn’t say the same for tonight. And a part of me felt guilty for not only seeing him, but for knowing that I had no plans to tell Adam about it.

And though I knew he’d have an issue with this kind of dishonesty, I was confident that my decision to see Max was the right one. I couldn’t put my relationship with Max behind me until I got the answers I needed. But dragging Adam into this served no purpose. In this instance, what he didn’t know really wouldn’t hurt him.

“Of course,” I said, finally answering Amanda’s question. “Why wouldn’t I come home? I’m just going to meet up with some friends,” I replied innocently, hoping to dissuade her curiosity. It didn’t work.

“I just wasn’t sure what kind of friends these were.”

“Since you pluralized ‘friends,’ and asked me if I was spending the night elsewhere, are you insinuating that I’m engaging in recreational sex with multiple partners?” I pretended to be affronted as I put my hand on my chest for effect, hoping humor would stop her from grilling me so I could get the hell out of there.

“Well, ya never know with you,” Amanda replied with a smirk.

Damn. I walked right into that one. “Well, it’s been lovely chatting with you crazy kids, but I’ve taken up enough of your night. Besides, I have places to be and evidently tons of people to bang.” I pulled the front door open and looked down at them, “You guys are really great together.” I started to close the door behind me, but popped my head back in quickly. “Oh, and don’t f*ck on my couch.” And with that, I slammed the door and made my way downstairs, smiling broadly.

***

Once in my car, thoughts of Amanda and Shane drifted away. Instead, my thoughts were consumed with what I was doing. I was walking a delicate line and had to be careful not to sway too far one way or the other. Why was I putting myself through this? The situation I currently found myself in caused nothing but stress. And it was a huge distraction. I had just learned how to handle my own shit when I had his foisted upon me. And his shit was way heavier than mine. Then I free myself from all of the Max-centered drama, only to willingly walk back into it. And for what? I really didn’t need this aggravation when I had just gotten myself back on track with Adam.

But, ultimately, I knew why I was doing it. I just couldn’t leave things on bad terms with Max, especially not now that I knew what he had done for me. And I knew that he still needed me. Yes, it was twisted and confusing and more than slightly insane, but none of that really mattered. Not when you had the power to help someone put the pieces back together again. Even if his life would never be perfect, at least it could be whole. After all, I had been the reason he had shattered in the first place. I had to try and make it right.

As I parked my car and walked up his driveway, I thought about how far our relationship had come in the past four months. He had gone from flat out refusing to see me, to yelling at me, to calling me late at night when his depression hit him hardest, to finally starting to let me back into his life. And I did want to be in his life, even if it had disaster written all over it.

I rang the doorbell and took a deep breath. I wondered if I would always experience this hesitation when I saw him. Despite how much progress our friendship had made before I’d ended it, I still felt butterflies at the prospect of being in his company. As he pulled the door open, my eyes surveyed him briefly, and I quickly tried to steel my resolve. I was there for noble reasons. I was there as a friend. I would not fall back into the same old pattern with him. He deserved better than that. But goddamn, was he sexy.

“Hey,” he said quietly, a shy smile playing on his lips. His coyness only made him more attractive. This man in front of me was different from the one I knew so intimately nine months ago. I wasn’t sure which I liked more.

He stepped back so that I could enter. As I moved closer to him, I felt the familiar jolt of electricity that crackled between us whenever we were near. The feeling both terrified and titillated me. I looked up at him as I passed, our gazes locking instantly, and I spoke the only word my mind could formulate.

“Hi.”





Chapter 26: Max


Am I f*cking dreaming? What the hell is she doing here? My mind was rapid firing expletive-filled questions as I watched her walk into my house and greet my dogs. Why do I feel like my heart is going to beat out of my f*cking chest? I closed the door, and tried to regulate my breathing. And my emotions.

I wasn’t sure how I felt about having her there. On one hand, I was more excited than a six-year-old on Christmas. But on the other, I felt like an inmate peering out of the prison fence, looking at the life he would never have. I turned around to see her bent down on one knee, petting my dogs as they licked her lovingly. I’d never been more jealous of an animal in my life. “I’m surprised to see you. Everything okay?” My voice was soft, quiet, unsure. All of the things I normally wasn’t.