One Night to Risk It All(39)

She shook her head. “That’s not what I mean.”

“Say what you mean.”

“I don’t...”

“You want my cock?” She nodded, biting her lip hard. “Then tell me.”

Heat flooded her face—embarrassment and arousal. So silly when she was being so intimate with him. When they’d done even more only a half hour ago, why couldn’t she say what she wanted? Why was it so hard to be honest? With him? With herself?

“I want your cock inside of me,” she said, the words coming out in a rush.

He cupped her chin, held her face steady while he kissed her deep. He withdrew his fingers from her and lifted her up into his arms, carrying her into the bedroom and depositing her on the center of the bed, pushing his underwear down his legs and coming to join her.

He parted her thighs and gripped his thick erection, pressing himself to the entrance of her body, guiding himself in slowly.

She arched, a harsh cry escaping her lips as he filled her. Stretched her. She felt so close, so needy—incredibly, considering what had happened earlier. But she couldn’t get enough of him.

She’d been waiting for this, for him, all of her life.

As soon as she had the thought, she pushed it away. She pushed everything away. The barrier she kept between herself and the world.

She forgot to feel shame. She forgot to curb her emotions. She forgot to be quiet and dignified. Instead she clung to his shoulders, dug her nails into his skin and wrapped her legs around his hips.

Instead she bit his neck and cried out her pleasure, riding the wave of pleasure to ecstasy. He pounded hard into her body until he stiffened, a hoarse cry on his lips as he found his own pleasure, as he poured himself into her.

Afterward she lay there, shaking. Feeling vulnerable and exposed. Like a creature that had been dragged out of its den and forced into the sunlight, uncovered, unprotected.

And she started retreating as quickly as possible. Did her best to try and rebuild her defense system.

But his arms were around her and he was kissing her neck, her shoulder, the curve of her breast. It made it impossible to retreat fully. Because he was holding her captive.

“You can’t possibly want to do that again,” she said. “I’m completely spent.”

“That’s one of the perks of younger men,” he said, pinching her nipple lightly. “We can go all night.”

“I can’t. I’m exhausted.” Physically, she could have him again. She already wanted him. How could she ever get tired of a man like him?

But emotionally? She didn’t have the strength. Because he’d done something to her. It was more than unleashing a wild part of herself she hadn’t known existed. It was more than just sex. She was stripped naked, down to her soul, and there was no way she could go through any more just yet.

It was all starting to catch up with her. The reality of her actions, from the moment she’d met him until she’d told him so bluntly what she’d wanted from him.

She looked at him, their eyes clashing. He was so beautiful. A man built to tempt even the most righteous of women. And she’d never been all that righteous. She’d only been pretending.

This man was the father of her baby.

Her stomach lurched, the thought butting up hard against her compromised defenses. Oh, good Lord, the baby...

She shivered, a dry sob in her throat. But still there were no tears.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“I don’t know...I...I was thinking about the baby.”

He froze behind her, then his hand drifted from her breast down to her stomach. “How are you feeling about it?”

Scared. “Okay. I mean...it’s a lot to deal with.”

“Naturally. And what are your plans?” he asked. “If you don’t marry me, what do you think we’ll do?”

“I don’t want to talk about this right now.” She felt scrubbed raw, and she didn’t think she could even handle thinking about the pregnancy in terms of it producing an actual baby at the end, much less how Alex and her relationship with him would squeeze in around that.

“Then when, Rachel? You’re pregnant with my child. You continue to end up in my bed. Marriage is—”

“Is that what this is about?”

“What?”

“You...putting the moves on me. Is it just so I’ll agree to this...marriage thing?”

“This marriage thing,” he said, moving away from her and getting off of the bed, “is the best chance our child has at a normal life.”

“Oh! So we’re normal? What in all the world makes you think that?”

“I didn’t say we were, but a normal family structure is the best chance this child has.”

“And you want to prove something to Ajax?”

“This has nothing to do with Ajax! When I went to that wedding, I went for you. You could have been marrying my very best friend and I would have come to take you. Because you’re mine. It’s that simple.”

“I’m yours? Why?”

“Because,” he said, his words tight. “Because you’re having my baby.”

“You didn’t know I was.”

“And because I want you.”

“To be who you want. To do what you want.”