One More for Christmas(43)

“Happy to walk you through it anytime.” His expression was grim, and she shook her head and shifted the subject away from the scary topic of money.

“So is Samantha bringing her husband? Partner?”

“No partner.” He adjusted his gloves and picked up armfuls of the holly he’d cut earlier. “Also coming along are her sister, brother-in-law and niece, aged four, I think. Or maybe it was five. Her mother, too.”

“Five? That’s young.” Kirstie frowned. “We’ll have to make sure she doesn’t fall into the loch.”

“She won’t be going outside by herself.”

“They’re city people. What if they hate Bear?”

“Just because they live in a city, doesn’t mean they hate dogs.”

“A child that age will be bored here. No shops or theme parks.” She knew she was behaving like a toddler in a tantrum, but she was raw inside and out. Why was life so unfair? She needed to hit out, and he was the only one she could hit.

“We’ll teach her to love the outdoors. She can ride Pepper and feed the reindeer.”

“No one has ridden Pepper for years.”

“Then it will be a refreshing change for him.” He stripped off spiky leaves from the bottom of the holly. “I thought we could use this around the fireplaces. Make it festive.”

“Why not? You could add mistletoe, in case your Americans are feeling romantic.”

“They’re not ‘my’ Americans.”

“It’s your idea.” Kirstie hesitated. “I caught Mum crying in the kitchen. She said she’d been chopping onions but that was a lie.” It made her feel helpless, and she hated feeling helpless.

“She’s the reason we’re doing this. This is the only home she has ever known. Why can’t you understand that?”

“But will it even feel like home when it’s overrun by strangers?”

“One family, Kirstie! If it doesn’t work, we won’t do it again.” There was a note of exasperation in his voice. “One family can’t overrun anything. It will be personal. Intimate. We’re offering a family Christmas, not a free-for-all.”

“Exactly. A Family Christmas. Except, they’re not our family, are they? Instead of sitting round and spending time together the way we usually do, we’ll be working in the kitchen to feed people we don’t know. What if they argue? What if they’re difficult people? The problem with a small, intimate group is that if they’re boring or rude, you can’t dilute them.”

“Then it will be a Christmas to remember. Can you manage those logs or do you need my help?”

She threw him a look.

“Do you know how it feels to be making our house festive for someone else?”

“For all of us. You’re living in it too, Kirstie. It’s going to feel the same way it always feels, only possibly less disorganized. Maybe you’ll even enjoy it. It’s a matter of attitude.”

“No, it’s a fact. You’ve sacrificed our family Christmas for commercial reasons.”

“Practical reasons. And I haven’t sacrificed anything. It will still be Christmas. We’ll be cooking the same food, using the same decorations on the tree. Maybe you need to be more realistic about this time of year instead of always thinking it will be a magical time—”

Was she being pathetic? Nostalgic? “How can it be magical? It’s just not the same without—”

“I know. It can’t be the same. It won’t be. So we need to make it different. Maybe it’s a good thing to shake it up a little.” His voice thickened and he stripped off another layer, his movements rough and angry.

“But spending it with strangers—”

“Since when have we refused to welcome a stranger into our home? Where’s the Highland hospitality we’re known for?”

She swallowed. He made her feel small and selfish and less than she wanted to be.

“Samantha is probably one of those scary, corporate types with perfect hair and nails and a no-nonsense attitude.” She wrapped her arms around herself, embarrassed by her own behavior. Wishing she was one of those people who could embrace change with humor. “In case you can’t tell, I’m having a bad day.”

He dropped what he was holding and gave her a hug. “You don’t have to apologize for that. We all have them.”

“But you don’t spill your feelings all over everyone.” She gave a sniff and pulled away. “You need a shower. You smell of woodsmoke.”

“Occupational hazard around here.”

“I’m trying to be angry with you.”

“I’d noticed.”

“Who is prepared to fly thousands of miles from home to spend Christmas with a bunch of strangers in the middle of nowhere? It’s strange.”

“Not that strange. She’s bringing her family with her. And don’t call it ‘the middle of nowhere.’ I don’t want to put people off coming here.”

“You can’t hide what we are or where we are. The nearest town is an hour away in good weather.”

He dropped the branch of holly onto the pile on the floor. “If they wanted a town, they wouldn’t be choosing this place. And the village is closer than that.”