Nocturne(110)

I tried not to gasp. I tried to hide my reaction. But standing on the overpass, looking ... lost ... was Savannah. No more than fifty feet away, but it might as well have been ten miles. Her eyes were sad, her face lined with grief.

She turned away and faded into the crowd like the beautiful mirage she was.

If I’d known then it would be the last time I saw her? I’d have gotten out of the car, leaving Karin behind, and chased her down. But as it was, I saw her turn her back and disappear, and my heart broke as she walked away. But I knew I had every intention of finding her, the next day or the day after that. But first, I had to deal with Karin.

“It’s not about her, Karin. It’s about us.”

“Bullshit!” she screamed. “If you hadn’t spent the summer sleeping with her, you wouldn’t be asking me for a divorce! You are so full of shit!”

“You want to f*cking lay money on that, Karin? You lied to me about trying to get pregnant. What were you going to say if it worked! Oops?” My voice came out in a roar that filled the car, and I immediately recoiled, even as part of me took immense satisfaction in letting out all of the rage I’d felt.

Another car behind us honked their horn, and I heard a voice with a thick Boston accent shouting obscenities from up ahead. Then we inched forward five feet, and everyone came to a stop again, and Karin said, “If you weren’t such a selfish coward … I gave up everything for you.”

“What the f*ck are you talking about?” I shouted. “You gave up exactly nothing.”

“I gave up children!” she shouted.

I didn’t answer, just slammed my fist into the door. And then my phone rang.





Savannah


Most of the VIPs … and Gregory and Karin, left in a hurry, leaving all remaining eyes on me. I quickly made my way to Joseph, who was still staring at the space vacated by Gregory, confusion rippling across his face.

“I’m sorry that happened, Joseph …” I trailed off, shaking my head. “Thank you for the opportunity this summer. I’m … I’m sorry,” I said again, giving him a quick hug.

“No worries, Savannah.” His reaction surprised me. He grinned and shrugged. “Musicians can be quite … passionate, you know.”

I did. I gave him another hug before turning to Nathan, who, thankfully, didn’t seem to be bleeding. I just needed to get out of there. Brushing past him, he grabbed onto my wrist.

“Savannah.”

“No,” I cracked sharply.

“I’m sorry.” He looked up at Christine as he sat, holding a bag of ice to his swollen cheek. She sighed and shook her head with a mix of emotions playing across her face.

“You’re sorry? Sorry? I can’t deal with this shit right now, my f*cking mother is here.”

I shook free from his grasp and purposefully configured my posture to hide every emotion possible from my mother.

In truth, my pulse never quieted after my song with Gregory. Seeing my mother standing cross-armed next to Malcolm did little to help that. The judgmental look on her face was enough to make me want to slap her, but there had been enough violence in Symphony Hall for one evening.

“That was quite a show, Savannah.” Her expertly manicured eyebrow judged me as it arched its way skyward. Malcolm shifted uncomfortably at her side.

Suddenly I had no interest in giving her any of my time. I was desperate to process what had just happened and to discuss the summer. But I couldn’t. Not with her. I turned to leave.

“Where are you going?” she asked, sounding rather annoyed.

“Cab. Home.” I shoved my flute case into my shoulder bag and made my way down the long hall, knowing full well she was following closely behind. I made it all the way outside before acknowledging her. “Leave me alone.”

“Hardly, darling. Not when you’re in the middle of destroying your career.” Whenever she said darling it took on a haughty British air, which annoyed me even further given Italian was her first language. And she was an American citizen.

Turning around, I sized Malcolm up quickly before speaking loud to be heard over the traffic and honking horns.

“Vai.” I commanded her to go in a language she might understand, since her English seemed to be failing her.

“Calmati.” She tilted her head to the side mockingly, suggesting I actually calm down. “There’s no need to hide this conversation, Savannah.”

“We’re not having a conversation. I’m leaving.” Turning without a second glance at her silent boyfriend, I made it down one stair.

“And where is it that you’re going? Home? You don’t have one here, remember? Or, were you planning to run to the house of your lover … who appears to be married?”

“Wow,” I turned around and took three measured steps toward her, “those are some serious accusations coming from someone like you.”

My mother swallowed once, sneaking a sideways glance at Malcolm, who looked as though he was about to speak. She stopped him by putting her hand up. “You seem to have your facts mixed up, Savannah. I never slept with a married man.”

“That’s where you’re mistaken, Vita.” I leaned in so only she could hear me. “Dad. Dad was a married man. To you. Or, is it that your marriage vows meant so little, you conveniently forgot about them while you were in bed with him?” I tilted my chin toward Malcolm who wisely looked away from me.