Nobody's Lost (Rescue Me Saga #5)(25)

Resilience. Megan must have inherited it from her mom.

With arms outstretched, she started walking toward him. Their hands met and lingered a moment before they both reached for their new ends and repeated, coming together again. Her body’s heat radiated through the sheet to him. She stared into his eyes longer than made him comfortable.

“Have you ever thought about kissing me?”

Now, his fantasies of her were hitting him while wide awake. At least he was pretty sure he was awake and had just imagined Megan talking about kissing her.

“Well, have you?”

So she’d actually asked that question? “No.”

Liar.

The twinkle in her eyes faded, and he could kick himself for being the reason.

“Sorry. I sometimes don’t think before I talk.”

When she moved to turn away, he threw the folded sheet on the table and reached for her arms.

“Okay, I lied. I’ve thought about that and more. A lot more. But we can’t go there.”

Her breathing grew shallow, and when she opened her mouth to let in more air, she only made him want to kiss her more than ever.

“Stop doing that.”

“Doing what?” The breathlessness in her voice made him hard.

Breathing.

Bewitching.

Being.

God forgive him, but he needed this.

He moved his hands to the sides of her face and lowered his mouth to hers. The first touch of their lips sent electric shocks through his body. More. He needed more. Faster than he should have, he forced his tongue between her lips. He’d been starving for this kiss since the first night he met her.

She groaned and tilted her pelvis into his.

Sweet Jesus, don’t do that to me, girl.

Her arms wrapped around his waist—either to keep her balance or draw him closer—before her tongue sparred with his. Another groan, this time definitely his. Where was he planning to go with this? There could never be anything between them. Leading her on to think there could be wasn’t his style.

He broke away, and both of them fought for breath.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”

“But I wanted you to. It was everything I’d hoped for and so much more.”

The desire within him nearly broke down his defenses. He’d never wanted anything more, but she deserved someone who could live in her world. He was marking time until he could get as far away from this place as possible. He needed to go back to a time when life was simpler. Live off the land. Take care of himself.

Home.

Megan went to the stove and pulled a piece of bacon off the paper towels. Watching her eat turned him on as much as kissing her.

“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to skip the rest of breakfast. I need to pack.”

He placed a gentle, but restricting hand on her arm. “Going somewhere?”

She flashed him a beautiful smile. “Yes. Your place.”

“Beg pardon?”

“Well, you’ve invited me to go there several times now. I said, ‘We’ll see.’ And now I’ve decided it’s a wonderful idea. Can you be ready in two hours?”

He nodded, unable to speak.

Home. He was going home.

With Megan.

Holy f*ck.

He watched her turn and walk toward the hallway, her ass bouncing with each step. After that kiss, this might be the worst decision he’d ever made. Well, in retrospect, he didn’t actually make the decision at all. She did.

But he could manage things better once he returned home. Survival variables would be off the table. He wouldn’t let this situation spiral out of control. He was in charge of carrying out this mission to protect her. She couldn’t call the shots—although she’d been doing that since he’d met her.

Once they arrived at his place, they would play by his rules.

Why did an image of Megan submitting to him flash in front of his eyes?

Hands off, grunt. She’s Top’s little sister.

A shout from down the hall took him away from his thoughts. “Get the lead out! An hour and forty-five minutes left.”

Damned bossy woman.

But this time he would obey. The sooner he cleaned up in here and packed what little he’d brought with him, the sooner he would be heading home.

*

Megan grinned as she packed her smallest suitcase. She figured she might be out there for a few days. Then she would insist that Adam call off this silly mission and let Ryder return to his own life again.

Her lips still tingled from where he had kissed her. She’d been kissed before, but never as thoroughly as by Ryder. She touched her fingertips to her lips and smiled.

But her smile faded as quickly. Could she allow something to blossom between them? She hadn’t been honest with him, never dreaming until last night that she would feel such a strong attraction to the man. Her secret wasn’t something she blurted out to everyone she met. Heck, no one but Mom knew. She hadn’t even told Patrick. He’d been deployed when she made her irrevocable decision.

She’d been twenty-four. Headstrong. Having suffered with the debilitating pain of endometriosis since she was thirteen—including several days each month where she could barely get out of bed—she chose quality of life over some nebulous dream of possibly getting married and having babies. Not that she hadn’t tried less permanent solutions. The third laparoscopic ablation hadn’t given her more than minimal relief for her last eighteen months of undergraduate school at Loyola. After nearly flunking out of her first year at USC working on her master’s, she’d insisted that her gynecologist do a total laparoscopic hysterectomy, including cervix and ovaries. She’d been on birth control pills since she was fourteen to try to control the pain and also wanted to avoid the side-effects associated with those if she stayed on them too much longer.