More Than I Could (67)

Kate chuckles. “So? Get her some. Problem solved.”

“I did get her some.” Then I gave her some.

My cock hardens as I remember her slipping into my bedroom Sunday night. I bent her over the edge of the bed and sank so deeply inside her that I was afraid I’d lose myself forever.

Unfortunately, I didn’t.

“Kate, I would never admit this to anyone else, so keep your mouth shut.”

“You got it.”

I groan. “I’m fucked up over this woman, and I don’t know what to do about it. It’s been two weeks. She’s all I think about. I’m already dreading the day she leaves. Tell me this is normal behavior. That I just haven’t had someone at my disposal like this in so long that I forgot what the convenience felt like.”

“Yeah, but I don’t think the convenience is bugging you.”

Of course, it’s not.

“Let’s break this down,” she says. “What are you worrying about? What’s your holdup? Your hiccup, so to speak?”

“Well …” I run a hand over my jaw. “She’s going to leave soon.”

“And you can’t ask her to stay?”

“No, I could, I guess.”

“Solved. What else?”

I flip my turn signal and pull onto the gravel road leading to my house.

“I’m worried this isn’t the right move for Kennedy,” I say, my voice void of levity. “She’s never had to share me with another woman. And she’s at this stage of her life where she needs to be the only thing I focus on, but here we are, and I’m thinking about Megan just as much as I’m thinking about my daughter. Hell, probably more. Am I fucking this up?”

Kate laughs. “No, you’re not fucking anything up—except maybe Megan, and I’m pretty sure she’s enjoying it.”

“No. Hard limit. We aren’t discussing my sex life.”

“Fine, fine.” She sighs. “Look, maybe you need someone in your life. Kennedy needs a woman figure, Chase. A role model. And it would be healthy for her to watch you in a solid relationship with someone. Stop looking at it from a pessimistic angle. You’re allowed to have a life, too, you know.”

Relief washes over me.

“And I know what you’re thinking,” she says.

“What’s that?”

“You’re worrying that things won’t work out, and you’re going a million miles a minute and wondering what that looks like. You’re wondering if it makes you irresponsible.”

I grin. “How did you get so wise?”

“Well, that had nothing to do with you. Or Gav. Definitely not Luke or Mallet.”

“Speaking of Mallet, have you heard from him lately? I haven’t talked to him in a while.”

“Briefly. We talked briefly last week. He’s good, I think. Sounded happy for once. Well, happy in Mallet language.”

I laugh. “I feel you on that.”

“Right? But, no, he’s okay. He finally seems to be coming around again. You can talk to him about things now that don’t always wind up being about the divorce, so that helps.”

I frown.

“But back to you,” she says. “Do you like Megan? Like really like her?”

“Kate, I don’t know. I mean, yes. I do. But I’ve known her for less than a month, and it’s ridiculous that I feel this way. I don’t even know her. I sure as hell don’t know her well enough to wonder if it’s realistic or ludicrous even to consider the shit I’m considering.”

“Only you know the answer to that.”

“Nah, you know. Tell me. Am I being ignorant? I mean, she either leaves in two weeks, and I never see her again.” My stomach clenches. “Or she leaves, and we try some long-distance thing.” That will never work. “Or she leaves, and we see how it goes. Or she stays here and …” I sigh. “Fuck.”

Kate chuckles softly. “I love seeing you like this.”

“How?”

“I don’t know. Living a life, maybe. Having something for yourself. It’s nice.”

Yeah, it’s nice. For now.

Mom’s voice echoes in the distance.

“I gotta go. I promised Mom pedicures today,” Kate says. “So we’re off to get pampered while Dad golfs. Again.”

“I didn’t even know Dad likes golf.”

“Me either.”

“Okay, well, I’ll talk to you later. Tell Mom I love her.”

“I will. And Chase?”

“Yeah?”

“You’re allowed to have a life. You should have one. Everyone will be better for it—Kennedy included.”

I pause. “But what if it doesn’t work out? What if Kennedy is attached and Megan takes off?”

“Then Kennedy becomes more resilient. You, of all people, know how strong that little girl is. She lost her mother and somehow still became this happy, spirited, tenacious young woman.”

My heart warms. That’s true. She has.

“I think you’re overthinking this a little, Chase. You’re not giving Kennedy enough credit. I mean, sure, if things get serious between you and Megan and they don’t work out, Ken might be upset. But Chase …” She pauses. “What if they work out? I know you, big brother, and you would never even consider letting someone into your life who wasn’t an amazing person. So if this is even on your radar, that means something. And maybe it means that Megan could not only be good for you, but she might also be very good for Kennedy.”