Make a Wish (Spark House #3)(46)

“That’s understandable. It has to be a big change for all of you.” Although I have to wonder how much those feelings are being directed my way because of my previous role in Peyton’s life. It makes me question exactly how much she knows, but I don’t have the guts to ask. Not right now, when everything feels so unsteady.

“It doesn’t make it acceptable, though. I didn’t want you to think I was okay with the way she acted.”

“I appreciate that. And I appreciate your apology, even though it’s unnecessary.”

“It felt necessary to me.” He tucks a thumb in his pocket and rocks back on his heels. “So, uh, there’s a theater in the park event coming up next weekend. I know you probably have plans with your boyfriend, but I’m taking Peyton, and I wanted to extend the invitation. My treat. As a thank-you.”

“Oh, uh, Chad and I aren’t together anymore, so my social calendar is wide open, unless I’m working a Spark House event.” I wish that had come out way less pitchy.

Gavin’s eyebrows shoot up. “What? When did that happen?”

“We broke up this weekend.” I amend that statement. “I broke up with him.”

“Oh. I’m … sorry?” It’s phrased more like a question than a statement.

I shrug, and once again the blanket of guilt weighs heavy on my shoulders for not seeing what I should have weeks ago. “He and I weren’t on the same page, and we weren’t right for each other. I wasn’t as invested in our relationship as I should have been.”

Gavin takes a seat on the chair across from me, his expression shifting to disquiet. “Is this my fault? Is it because of how I reacted when I came to pick up Peyton?”

I look away, struggling to meet his concerned gaze. Now that I’ve officially ended the relationship with Chad, I can see there’s an attraction to Gavin that I’ve been working to keep buried along with the memories and the guilt. I just had a reason before now not to acknowledge them.

“Harley?” His voice is soft, and he leans forward, his elbows resting on his thighs. “Is this because of me?”

“Sorry.” I shake my head. “No. It’s not because of you, Gavin.” I don’t need him feeling bad about this. I can carry that on my own. He has enough of his own baggage without taking on mine too. “I realized he and I are in different places in our lives, and what I want and what he wants isn’t the same thing.”

“Are you okay? Is there anything I can do?” Gavin laces his fingers together, and his foot taps restlessly on the floor.

“No, I just need a bit of time to process. Let me check my schedule and see about the outdoor theater event. That would be fun if I can swing it.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want you to feel obligated.”

“I’m sure. It’ll be a good distraction.”



* * *



A week after Chad and I break up, I drop off a box of the things he left at my place at his apartment. It wasn’t much, just a single outfit, a couple of ties and button-downs, a pair of pajama pants, and a toothbrush. We hadn’t spoken since the breakup, apart from me texting to ask if I can drop off his stuff. London asked if I wanted her to come with me. But I told her I needed to do it on my own.

My stomach flips as I knock on his door. My palms are sweaty. I don’t know what to expect, but I’m hoping it doesn’t end with me feeling worse than I already do about this whole thing.

Chad opens the door. He’s dressed in jeans and a T-shirt with a game logo on it. He looks good and not like he’s been sad or moping for the past week. And that’s a relief.

I swallow down my anxiety. “Hey.”

His gaze roves over my face and drops to the box in my hands. “Hey. Thanks for bringing my stuff back.”

“Don’t thank me.” I purse my lips and close my eyes, giving my head a quick shake. “I’m really sorry, Chad.”

“For what?” He takes the box from me and hands over the key to my apartment, which means I have something to flip between my fingers.

“For not seeing what you could before I did.”

“You mean about that Gavin dude? He ask you out on a date yet?”

“Yes, and no.” I blow out a breath and shove my thumbs in the back pocket of my jeans. “I mean, he hasn’t asked me out.”

“He knows we broke up, though?” He tucks the box under one arm and leans against the doorjamb.

“Yeah. He knows.”

“I figured.” Chad nods once and gives me a wry smile. “And he’ll ask soon, if he’s smart, anyway.” He blows out a breath and nudges the toe of my shoe with his. “Look, I know you’re kind of used to holding on to blame like it’s yours to own, but I’ve done a lot of thinking this week, and you weren’t wrong, about us, I mean. I really like you and you’re an awesome person, but we were missing something. So don’t beat yourself up over this, okay?”

“You don’t have to let me off the hook, Chad. I know I was in the wrong,” I tell him.

“I’m not letting you off the hook. I’m telling you to let yourself off the hook.” He gives me a wry smile. “We both deserve to be happy, even if it’s not with each other.”