Loving Mr. Daniels(66)

I continued sobbing, knowing something was wrong, feeling the same way I’d felt when Gabby…
I blinked hard. I couldn’t think about that.
“We need to get dressed,” Daniel ordered. He left the room and came back with my outfit from the day before. I couldn’t move from the bed. He started to dress me, adding on each article of clothing, one by one. Each time he added a piece, the heavier the situation felt.
We walked across the hall and of course Daniel’s bed was empty. “He’s gone, Daniel, I know he is.” He didn’t reply. When we looked out the front yard and saw that Hailey’s car was gone, I swore I heard him choke on air. He picked up a backpack that was lying open on the front porch.
“Did he have any money?” Daniel hissed.
My mind froze, confused. He repeated himself, this time harsher.
“Henry gave him three hundred dollars—”
“Jace…” he muttered before he ran off to the boat shed.
I hurried right behind him. The doors flew opened and Daniel marched onto the boat, never pausing to breathe. He picked up the money that was sitting on the deck. Three hundred bucks. His brother was laid out sleeping and Daniel began shaking him.
“Jace! I swear to God, if you did this…”
Jace opened his eyes, stirring. “What the hell are you doing?”
“You sold to a kid! My student, Jace!” He threw the empty backpack into his brother’s face. My face burned. My legs were numb. My stomach knotted. “Sarah’s accident wasn’t on you. Mom’s death wasn’t your fault. But I swear to God, if anything happens to that boy, it’s on you! It’s on you, Jace!”
Jace sat up, confused about his whereabouts at first. “What the hell are you talking about? Danny, I didn’t do anything—”
“We gotta go,” Daniel said, grabbing my arm to drag me out of the shed. “If he dies, Jace… If he dies, that’s on you! That’s on you!”
If he dies?
I started crying again.
Because I knew he was already dead.








#56. Let Him Go.
Ashlyn,
Last night I overheard Mr. Daniels fighting with his brother about some drugs. I borrowed some of the guy’s pills. Please let him know I left cash.
I wanted to wake you, but you looked happy next to him. He looked happier. Don’t let that happiness leave. If there’s anyone who deserves it, it’s you.
Can you burn the cardboard box for me? I no longer need the reminder.
Please tell Hailey I’m still here.
Always here.
-Ryan






Stars exploded and I was born. Please call me Tony.
~ Ryan Turner


The newspaper headline was an echo of his father’s.
Ryan Turner, son of Rebecca Turner, dies in a horrific car accident on the corner of Jefferson Avenue and Pine Street.
History sometimes repeated.
Tonight, souls cried both on earth and in heaven.






It doesn’t matter what you feel.
Just know the feelings are real.
~ Romeo’s Quest


The funeral was like all the others. Sad, painful, and wrapped in despair. Rebecca was in the corner speaking with the priest, and Henry stood greeting and thanking the guests who showed up. Which was a lot of guests—most of our senior class came.
I looked over and saw Avery standing with Hailey, tears rolling down his face. Hailey hugged him and didn’t dare tell him that everything was going to be okay.
“Hello, everyone. I am Father Evans. If we could all head inside, I believe we are ready to get started with the service.”
My hands smoothed over the black dress I’d worn to Gabby’s funeral, and I prided myself on my ability of not having cried thus far during the day. There were so many tears that had fallen in the hospital room, in the car, and in the house. So I promised myself to do my best to be the strong one in the church. When others broke down, I would stand strong for them.
The service went on, and many tears were shed from others. I sat in between Hailey and Rebecca in the front pew. Rebecca hadn’t said much since the accident, but I sat there squeezing her knee, which was rapidly tapping against the ground. I tried my best to read her emotions. She had to feel guilty for pushing Ryan away. For having isolated him in such a manner. She had to have wished it had been her in the car and not her baby boy. She had to be dead inside.
Blame wouldn’t do anyone any good though.
Not today.
It came time for people to give short speeches about Ryan and the short life he’d lived on this planet, and many stepped up, some cracking jokes, others cracking tears. I turned to Hailey, who’d told me earlier that she’d planned on saying a few words, but her gaze fell to the floor.
“I can’t… I can’t.” She wiped away a tear and stood, walking out of the church.
I didn’t know if I should follow her or aid Rebecca, whose shivers were growing more and more in-depth. Her breaths started picking up, and I felt as if a panic attack were about to overtake her.
Edging myself closer to her, I whispered into her ear, “He loved you. He still loves you. It’s okay to cry.”
The tears rolled down her cheeks and she nodded, her heavy breaths growing softer until she began to breathe like the sea at rest.
I turned to see Jake sitting in one of the pews, his eyes watering over. I frowned toward him. He gave me a simple nod before he walked out to check on Hailey.
Father Evans called for one last speaker, and when I looked up to see Daniel walking forward, my breath caught in my throat. When he reached the podium, he looked directly toward me. His eyes were deep wells of compassionate gloom. He reached into his suit pocket and pulled out a piece of paper, unfolding it before him.