Loving Me, Trusting You(41)

Okay, so I have no clue what that means, but I've heard Beck say it before and it fits. Anybody that think it's okay to tear the spirit out of these women deserves whatever he's got comin'. My thumb

cocks the hammer back and a smile lights my face. I don't know where it comes from, but I hope it looks as good as it feels. Austin doesn't even turn to look at me, just stays facing forward, blue eyes solid and serious. Nobody from Broken Dallas moves, and for a split second there, things look like they might turn out alright.

Guess I shoulda known better.





I know Bested by Crows is coming before they even show up. I know because it's the worst f*cking thing that could possibly happen right now. I've learned that if I expect the worst out of folks, they deliver.

Gaine's an anomaly I don't even want to touch right now. What he's doing and why he's doing it, I have no clue. He wants to protect me like some ancient caveman? Fuck him. He thinks that because I lost it last night that he was some rights over me? I shake in anger just thinking about it. But then there was that kiss. I don't even know what to make of that. It felt good, electric, like I was sticking my nail into an outlet, letting the flavors of the world pass through me in electrons and white hot blinding energy. It was good, I'll admit that at least, but it doesn't change a thing. Gaine Kelley is not good for me, and I'm even worse for him. I've got to stop this before it goes too far. I thought I could handle it before, but I was wrong. Whatever pull it is that he possesses, I'm having a hard time resisting.

I watch Gaine spin up and away, pulling his gun on our rival MC, putting forth a foot I never thought I'd see. Gaine is logical, the one that makes all the good decisions, that keeps a clear head. And here he is throwing caution to the wind? For me. It's all for me.

I stand up, too, and reach forward, digging my hand into the back of Austin's jeans. Amy might not like it, but I figure I've been there before so f*ck her. His gun comes out and rests heavy in my hand. I might not know shit about shooting, but really, there's not much to it, right? You pull the damn trigger and shit happens.

In a lot of places, this kind of crap would never have the chance to go down. The cops would get called, do-gooders would do what they do best and things would happen. As of right now, here in this small town, Broken Dallas is law and we're on their turf. Some of the other Triple M'ers might not know how these sorts of things work, but I do. I've lived in a 'real' gang, suffered at the hands of a 'real' MC. I don't know what might've happened with Broken Dallas and Triple M before, but Kent must've worked some of his magic on them because I could tell you from experience that things like this normally don't work out.

I aim the barrel at Will Walker's chest and hold it steady. Knowing I could blow his ass to kingdom come makes me feel better, but I manage, just barely, to hold back. Gaine was right. If I kill them in a fit of rage, I'll never be able to make peace with myself or my past. I have to make a conscious decision, and I have to do it right.

I keep my arm very, very still.

“I thought with Kent dead, the trap was set, the rat was caught. But that was no done deal. Our rodent is still very much alive, don't you think?” Kimmi asks, sliding out from behind her ride in a spray of wild hair and glimmering earrings. See, I really do like her. Any woman that can kick ass and look good doing it holds a special place in my heart. I'll just never tell her that.

“You have to imagine that he had allies, am I right? We're going to have to do a lot more weeding to take care of this garden,” Gaine says, eyes focused on the rumbling herd of *s rolling into the gate.

“Amen to that,” Austin says with a slight quirk of a smile on his crooked mouth. The scar at the edge of his lip tugs at his face as he struggles to control his amusement at the current situation. “That's why I've got back up.”

“Back up?” Gaine asks and then Austin's lifting his hand and beckoning with crooked fingers, drawing a group of Triple M'ers out from behind the rusted fencing, bringing the crouching bodies through holes in the chain link and out of bushes. There are definitely some bonuses to having a large group. Oh yeah, and to not shafting our women. Girls with guns, baby, all the way. I try not to smile.

“Afternoon, folks,” Will says, climbing off his bike like he doesn't have a care in the world. He should. His impending death is near; he just doesn't believe it yet. But he will, most likely when it's too late. He walks to the edge of the perimeter Broken Dallas has made with their bikes and stands with his hands in his back pockets. Something about his demeanor is different today. His skin seems paler, more taut, stretched across his chubby as f*ck face.

He knows.

This time, I do smile.

“You Goddamn bitch!” he screams, spittle flecking the dry air and evaporating as if it had never been. It's so friggin' arid in this damn town. I'm already counting down the hours until we leave. “You really did it, didn't you?” Will laughs, and the sound is horrid, like nails across a chalkboard, bitter and tinged with sorrow. Huh. Didn't realize he had the emotion in him. Doesn't make me feel sorry for him. There is nothing he could do at this point to redeem himself in my eyes. His soul is black as tar and twice as sticky. He's out and that's that. I won't rest until my demons lie dead and bleeding, but on my terms. Right here, today, Will lives. Tomorrow, he might not be so lucky.