Love Online(58)

He shook his head slowly as he squeezed my hands. “I’m so happy you’re here. So happy.”

Our attention seemed to turn to Mallory at the same time. She stood there frozen, looking as surprised to see me as I’d been when I first noticed her. The sudden look of concern on Ryder’s face told me he knew I recognized her from the photo.

“Mallory, this is my girlfriend, Eden.”

Relief poured through me. His girlfriend. He’d still called me his girlfriend.

Mallory looked like she’d been smacked in the face. She cleared her throat. “Girlfriend… Oh, I didn’t realize.”

“Hello,” I said.

“Hi.” She nodded. “Excuse me for a moment.”

I watched as she rushed through the crowd and disappeared into a hallway.

I turned my attention back to Ryder. “I’d better move. I’m holding up the line.”

He grabbed my arm. “Don’t go. I want you to stand with me.”

“Really?”

“Yes, if you don’t mind.”

I was honored that he wanted me next to him. My bladder felt like it was going to burst, though. I had rushed here from the airport and hadn’t used the bathroom since Utah.

“Let me just find a bathroom. I need to go badly. And I’ll come right back.”

He nodded. “Okay.”

I found a lavatory across the hall and relieved myself. As I was washing my hands, it became clear where Mallory had disappeared to as she was suddenly staring at my reflection in the mirror. We were totally alone.

“I’m sorry for walking away rudely,” she said.

I shut off the water and shook my hands. “Oh, I didn’t take it that way.”

Her eyes were red. They weren’t that way before.

She’s been crying.

“It’s just… I was a little taken aback,” she said. “I didn’t think Ryder was with anyone.” She exhaled as she turned on the water. “I needed a moment to breathe.”

Not knowing what else to say, I blurted out, “You’re his ex-girlfriend.”

“Yes. I’m sure he’s mentioned me?”

“Yeah. He has.”

A look of sadness washed over her face. “I’m so devastated for him.”

“Me, too.”

“I love him,” she confessed. She started to wash her hands and repeated, “I still love him.”

All of the muscles in my body seemed to tighten at once as I swallowed. “Okay…”

“I’m sorry. I know you probably don’t want to hear that.”

Yeah. No shit, I don’t.

When I didn’t respond, she asked, “How long have you guys been together?”

“A few months…”

She grabbed a paper towel and began wiping her hands. “Is it serious?”

“I care about him very much.”

I love him, too, but I haven’t told him that. So I’m sure as hell not telling you.

She looked like she was almost ready to cry.

“Look, I don’t know what’s going on here,” I told her. “I thought you were engaged to someone else.”

“Aaron.” She shook her head. “I broke it off with him.”

Ugh. Of course.

I pretended to be calm as I panicked inside. “What happened?”

“To make a long story short, we ran into Ryder one night, and I didn’t do a very good job of hiding my feelings after we got home. Aaron kept pushing, trying to get me to admit I still had feelings for him.” She inhaled then exhaled slowly. “In the weeks after that, I started to realize I’d been in denial. I’d rushed into the relationship to hide from my sadness over the way things ended with Ryder. I realized ending things with him was the biggest mistake I’ve made in my life.”

I felt like I was gearing up for war. “What are you saying?”

“I’m saying I’m still in love with him. He’s the love of my life, and I think he’s still in love with me, too.”

I felt nauseous. “Have you told him all this?”

“We only saw each other for the first time in a long time earlier today. I told him my engagement was over, but I didn’t tell him how I feel. He knows nothing about my feelings.”

“Why are you telling me all of this right now?”

“Because I think you should know I do plan to tell him. Not today. Not tomorrow. Not during this difficult time. That wouldn’t be appropriate. He needs time to heal. But I’m going to tell him soon.”

When someone walked in, her head turned toward the door. “Please don’t mention we had this conversation. It will stress him out, and I don’t want that right now.”

A woman came between us to wash her hands. After she left, Mallory said, “Did you know Ryder’s dad?”

“No.”

“His father was his entire world. It’s going to be a long time before Ryder can deal with anything else. So again, please don’t mention we had this conversation.”

Before I could respond, she walked out. It took me a few minutes to regain my bearings enough to return to the main room where Ryder was waiting.

“I was starting to worry you weren’t coming back,” he said. “I thought maybe I’d hallucinated you coming in the first place.”