Losing Me, Finding You(80)

Being my roommate and best girlfriend, Hazel knew all about Curtis and we had spent hours gushing over what his kiss would feel like. I turned to her slowly with a shocked smile, turning my lips slightly upwards when I finally managed to say, “Curtis just asked me out to dinner. He's picking me up at seven.” We both squealed and jumped up and down like tweens meeting Hanson. We decided to go back to our dorm so we could fully prepare for the evening.

Three hours later and two small burns from my Chi hair straightener, I was ready for my date. We had finally decided on a cute, black mid-length skirt and an embellished pink top. He called me from the bottom door of our dorms and Hazel gave me a hug as I walked down the stairs to the date I had been waiting for for nine months. When I got downstairs, I saw him in all his Southern splendor. He had on a black button down shirt with the sleeves cuffed showing off his muscular forearms. Light blue jeans with tears in all the right places and a nice worn in pair of Doc Martens. He was sporting his favorite Auburn University baseball cap and his signature brown curls were peeking out of the back just like I remembered. I'm nearly certain I blushed as he intertwined his strong hand in mine and led me to his Honda Civic. We were about halfway through the quad when Hazel stuck her head out our third story window and yelled, “Don't freak out when I'm gone tonight! I'm spending the night at Zoe's! I won't be home til after class tomorrow.” I shook my head and tried to contain my laugh knowing what she really meant by her statement. She truly was the best roomy a girl could ask for.

We arrived at Steamers fifteen minutes later. It was an awesome local restaurant that only served ethically sound, fair trade food. You pay more but it tastes way better than all the cheap processed food right around campus. We caught up on the nine months we spent apart in between bites of Shriacha Chicken and wild rice. He had landed the promotion into security which was a step in the right direction of his main goal of becoming an FBI agent. He worked hard and the company knew it; he was phenomenal at his job. I told him about my B in calculus and how it wouldn't have been possible without his help. We talked about my new classes and about how excited I was for Marine Bio the following spring.

After dinner, we grabbed some froyo and continued our conversation. It was just like my daydreams. We were talking and laughing, staring right into each others souls like we knew we were meant to be together. Even those romantic movie montages had nothing on the night I was having. We finished our Pinkberry and decided to head back to campus for a late night stroll. He had moved here after graduating from Auburn and had no idea just how beautiful our historical brick college really was. We parked his car and I began leading him to all my favorite spots. It wasn't until we were sitting on the stone bench under the bell tower that we got into the conversation I was really interested in. We were looking out over the lake covered in lily pads and filled with ducks when he picked up my hand in his and placed it on his thigh. I tried to focus on keeping my breath normal as his rough finger traced the lines of my knuckles. He turned to me with my hand sandwiched between his and looked right at me. Now when I say looked right at me, I don't mean in my direction; I mean looked right through my eyes and into my soul before he said, “I'm sorry about not calling you sooner.” I opened my mouth to respond but he started talking before I had the chance.

“When I first met you, I had a girlfriend. I'm sure you could tell that my feelings weren't skin deep. I didn’t want to be your friend because I couldn't face the temptation. We broke up a couple months ago and I haven't been able to stop thinking about you. Would you like to try this? I mean you do have feelings for me too, right?”

I giggled maybe a little too vibrantly and saw his head dip down to inspect the blades of grass. I used my free hand to lift his chin and bring his eyes back to mine. I said, “I have dreamt about you saying that for the last nine months and you know what? It's even better in real life.”

I saw a sparkle in his beautiful brown eyes as his hands relinquished their hold on my hand and moved to my face. I was flooded with warmth and chills as his thumbs traced the lines of my face, leaving little trails of fire everywhere they touched and sending shivers down my spine.

In that moment, the whole world ceased to exist. It was just me and Curtis surrounded by the muted sounds of crickets basked in moonlight taking in every detail of the moment. Nothing in my wildest daydreams could have even come close to the fireworks that exploded when he finally leaned in and lightly grazed my lips with his. My body ignited with an electric current I had never felt as I took in that same smell that had sent me into a daze nearly a year ago. He leaned back and looked into my eyes as if asking if it was ok that he kissed me. I felt the corner of my mouth twist up as I bit on my lower lip completely in awe that this moment had finally come. He traced my now throbbing lips with his thumb before leaning in again to firmly place his lips on mine in our first real kiss. I swear we were floating through the clouds as our lips pressed together, breathing each other in. I could feel his passion, admiration and caring nature roll off of him. We could have kissed for hours sitting there on that bench but we finally broke apart. We walked hand in hand back to my dorm where he gave me one more quick peck before turning towards his car. I grabbed his wrist before he could escape and invited him in for cocoa and Boondock Saints.

We spent the rest of the evening in each others arms. It was like that missing piece of my heart finally found its home and I was whole. Nothing happened, I was still a virgin. One earth shattering kiss was not enough to change that. But, we did drink cocoa and held each other while watching one of our favorite movies. It was an amazing feeling to be truly accepted for who I was and I knew that I could be exactly me with him.