Leo's Chance(44)

I feel relieved but a hot arrow of shame is slithering down my spine. I want so badly to share this with her, but know that it is the very thing that ruined us then and may ruin us now.

I clear my throat. "I miss you. I can't wait to see you. Am I still picking you up after work tonight?"

"Yes. I'll see you then, okay?"

"Okay. Evie, I've… I've really missed you. I know it's just been a couple days, but I, I'm just really looking forward to seeing you." I just want her. Need courses through my veins.

"Me too, Jake. See you tonight." Her voice is warmer now.

I disconnect and roll over, staring at the ceiling, wondering if Evie is going to be able to forgive me when she knows the truth.

**********

My morning meeting is wrapped up quickly and I’m able to get a flight back to Cincinnati that leaves an hour earlier than my originally scheduled flight. After picking up my car in the long-term lot, I have plenty of time to head to the mall. I’m going to buy Evie a laptop. She’s going to fight me on it but I’m doing it anyway. The need to make her life better in any way I possibly can is burning through me. Maybe it’s the foresight that my time in her life is temporary. I hope to God not and just the thought of that sends panic racing to my gut. I’d fight it tooth and nail but if that unthinkable scenario does in fact come to pass, I’m going to know I did what I could to put her in a position to make her dreams come true.

I drop it off at my condo and then go to pick Evie up at work. I wait for her outside my car and when she comes out, she sees me and halts, a beautiful smile spreading over her face. My whole body relaxes. I didn’t even realize how tense I was until I saw her. And now my pulse is strong and even in her presence.

"Hi," she says.

"Hi," I say back, still goofily grinning. We both burst out laughing and I can’t not touch her for a minute longer. I swoop her up and breathe her in. "God, I missed you. I missed your smile and," I stick my nose in the sweet crook of her neck, "your smell, your body against mine at night."

"I missed you too," she whispers back.

"You hungry?"

"Yeah, starving."

"Do you like sushi?" I ask.

"I do like sushi, but I can't go out dressed in my uniform."

"How about if we pick it up to go and bring it home?"

"Sounds great."

I drive to a little sushi place near my condo and run in and pick up dinner while she waits for me in the car.

When we walk into my condo, Evie halts, immediately spotting the MacBook I left open on my dining table with a red bow on top.

My heart picks up speed as I watch her take in the computer, finally looking up at me with a wary look on her face.

"Jake, you didn't–" she exclaims.

"Evie," I say, putting my hand up in a ‘stop’ gesture, "don't say anything until you hear me out. I know your first thought is going to be to say no to accepting this gift but please, just listen."

She raises an eyebrow but doesn’t say anything.

"I want to do this but not because it's just for you, but because I think you're amazing, and I think that making your dreams come true will spread far and wide and not only affect you, but would affect me, too, and many, many people beyond that. Please let me do this for you, Evie, and all those people out there who will be changed when they read the beautiful words that are in your soul."

She takes a deep breath, her eyes tearing up and says on a small laugh, "No pressure, right?"

When she walks over to the computer and starts looking it over, I know she’s going to accept it. I can’t help the grin that spreads across my face.

"You make it really, really hard to say no to you, do you know that Jake Madsen?" She takes a deep breath and I know what she’s feeling. I’ve been there, too. It can be a hit to your self-esteem to accept gifts from those who have more than you. I’m hoping like hell that her accepting this from me means she gets how much she gives me in return. Not monetarily, obviously, but in every way that really counts. She makes me happy. Unbelievably happy. And that’s worth all the MacBooks at Apple headquarters.

"Thank you," she finally says, looking me in the eye. I smile back.

**********

It’s a chilly night and so I flick on the gas fireplace, pour a couple glasses of wine and set them on the coffee table, and then lay our food out on a blanket on the floor. "Sushi picnic?" she asks, smiling and sitting down.

"Yup. When eating sushi, do like the Japanese do." I smile, kneeling down on the blanket across from her. I put my palms together in front of my face and bow slightly to her. She giggles and bows back. Then I grab our glasses and hand one to her. "To what?" she asks.

I consider. "To dreams." I say, clinking my glass to hers.

She takes a drink and then says, "Thank you again for the laptop, Jake." I just smile at her. That’s not the dream I was talking about but I let her think it is.

I open up all the containers – I got a little bit of everything since she told me to surprise her. She picks up her chopsticks and I unwrap a plastic fork. "Really, Jake?" she asks, inclining her head toward my fork. "When eating sushi, eat like the Japanese do."

"Babe, I don’t eat with sticks. I want to get the food in my mouth."