Last Light(41)

My last words hung between us. Matt’s hand stilled on Laurence’s head, then resumed down the rabbit’s back. He closed the cage and stood.

“I wanted my life back,” he said.

“Your life minus me.”

“I didn’t want this.”

Matt stormed out of the room. The bedroom door slammed.

“Oh, for f*ck’s sake,” I huffed.

I let Matt cool his heels in the bedroom. Whatever. If he wanted to fight, I had plenty of ammo. After all, I was the one taking heat over Night Owl. I was the one acting out our charade. I gained nothing from his absence except his absence, which seriously sucked.

I never got to go to dinner with my boyfriend anymore … never got to walk down the street holding his hand … all week I slept alone in our king-size bed. The hell with him. I was the one sacrificing. He got his happy anonymous little life, and he just wanted more, more, more.

I sneered and dropped onto the couch.

I finished my coffee and had another cup. I played Candy Crush on my phone. I even stood on the deck awhile, enjoying the crystalline silence. I wanted to wait Matt out. He owed me an apology. But he didn’t appear, and I heard no sound from the bedroom.

After an hour and a half, I knocked lightly on the door.

Nothing.

“Matt?”

Silence.

“Okay, I’m coming in, you big baby,” I said.

I slipped into the room.

My suitcase lay open on the bed, and it was empty. Matt lounged against the windowsill smoking. Gradually, I noticed my clothes and toiletries in various places around the room.

There was my nightgown, still neatly folded, sitting on the bedside table. And there were my boots poking out from under the bed.

“Yes,” Matt said. “I put all your things around here.” He gestured to the room without looking at me. “And in the bathroom, too. And I won’t help you find them, so good luck.”

I fought to keep a straight face.

Finally, he glanced at me. “I’m glad you find this amusing.”

“Matt…” I crept over to him and nuzzled his shoulder. “You’re crazy.”

“Mm.” He blew smoke out the open window.

“And you’re adorable.”

“Handsome,” he mumbled. His stubborn expression faltered.

“Okay, handsome.” I laughed. I plucked the cigarette from his fingers and took a drag. Matt blinked at me.

“Are you smoking now?”

“Nope.” I smiled and crushed out the cigarette. “And neither are you.”

*

I left the cabin around the same time I’d arrived on Friday, when the day’s last light stained the snow orange. Matt loved that time of day. He loved the sadness of it.

I knew he wouldn’t want to say good-bye, so after we got my stuff and Laurence’s cage into the car, we sat up front and talked about nothing. I wore my new owl earrings. Matt smiled and batted one with a finger.

“Let’s go,” he said. “I’ll ride to the end of the road with you.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah. I’ll walk back. It’s not far.”

I pulled out of the driveway and onto the darkening road. Flurries swirled through the air.

Matt was silent, staring ahead and running a hand over my thigh. Through the denim of my jeans, his fingertips set my leg on fire.

I stopped at the bottom of the hill. To our right and left, the country lane was barren.

I turned off my high beams and the car idled in the cold.

A lump of emotion formed in my throat.

“Hey, come here.” Matt pulled me over the console and kissed me. I sighed against his mouth. God, I already missed him so much.

I stroked his handsome face as we kissed and I kneaded the back of his neck. Our kiss grew hungry, and Matt tugged at my ribs to bring my body closer to his. The scent of his cologne filled my nostrils. His strong back shifted under my palms.

“Hannah…” He squeezed my breast through my coat.

I gasped and dug my fingers into his shoulders.

He stilled, breathing raggedly against my cheek.

“It’s okay,” I whispered. “It’s okay.” I touched his wrist and then his fingers. I fitted his hand around my breast and he groaned.

“Let me—” Matt’s hand slid down my body. He rubbed the denim seam covering my sex. “Let me just … touch it, Hannah … let me put my mouth on it. Please…”

He didn’t have to ask me twice. Together we fumbled with my zipper. I jerked my jeans and thong down my legs, worming around on the seat. I kicked off my boots. I spread my bare legs and gazed over at Matt, my chest heaving.

Damn … he looked so f*cking good, serious as hell and hungry. And even if the roads were vacant for miles, sitting bottomless in my car felt deliciously illicit.

Matt pushed my legs open wider and leaned down to my sex, his beautiful body stretched over my lap. I curled my fingers in his hair. Oh, I loved this, and Matt loved it, too. He trembled like a starved animal every time he went down on me.

“I just … want to taste it,” he said, his breath washing over my skin.

Matt didn’t tease me like usual. He simply kissed my *, hard. His fingers gripped my thighs and his tongue slid into my sex. We moaned together, me into the silence of the car and Matt against my hot, wet skin.