Ignite (Speed Series Book 1)(13)
“I almost did. Something about the woman you loved more than life itself showing up and acting like she has survived just fine since she ripped your heart out, well hell, it kind of f*cked me up all over again.”
Adaline’s eyes turned dark as she placed her hands on her hips and narrowed her left eye at me. “Survived just fine? Really, that’s what you think, Emmit? That I survived just fine?”
With a smirk, I said, “Well you sure didn’t try and make things work, Adaline. You walked away like what we had meant nothing to you.” Not sure if it was anger or hurt that moved across her face, but whatever it was, it caused tears to build in her eyes. Turning her back toward me, she spun back around and walked up to me as she poked me in the chest.
“I was confused, Emmit. I wanted the life I had dreamed of too. I couldn’t have that life while you followed your dreams. I didn’t want to make you think you had to give up your dream for me to follow mine! If we had stayed together, I knew you would start feeling guilty and you would have come after me, Emmit.”
I took in a calming breath as I looked into her eyes before I started talking. “We could have made it work, you weren’t willing to try, Adaline.”
A single tear fell from Adaline’s eye as her shoulders sagged and she let out a defeated breath. “You’re so wrong, Emmit. I walked away from us because I loved you that much. Do you remember when I went to camp the summer of our senior year? I was gone for two months. You couldn’t stand the time apart, and you gave up two months of racing and came to camp. Do you remember that?”
“That was a few f*cking dirt track races, Adaline. This is NASCAR. My dream. I would have figured out a way to see you and keep doing what I loved doing. Don’t blame this on me; you’re the one who doesn’t want this life.”
“I didn’t say that, Emmit!” Adaline screamed out. “I said I wanted time to follow my dreams. Traveling ten months out of the year, I would have never been able to go to college and get my degree. I did what I thought was right. It seems to me though you weren’t that heartbroken if you started bringing whores to your bed every night.”
With a toss of my head back, I laughed. “Oh please. Like you didn’t ever date or f*ck other guys, Adaline. I’m not stupid.”
Placing her hand over her stomach, Adaline took a step back as she pressed her lips tightly together. Grabbing her stuff, she headed for the door. She turned and looked at me. “I dated a few guys, but none of them were you. I haven’t been with anyone since the last night we spent together. I couldn’t because I was still in love with you. I guess I’m the fool in this situation.” Closing her eyes, she let out a quick laugh. When she opened her eyes, she glared at me. “That is one situation I intend on fixing right away.”
All the air left my lungs as I grabbed onto the counter top to keep from falling over. I slammed my hand over my face and dragged it down. What in the hell? Adaline hadn’t been with another guy. Holy f*ck did I mess up. I quickly made my way after her.
I stepped out between the buses and glanced both ways. My heart stopped the moment I saw Adaline talking to Malcolm. He looked over her shoulder directly at me as he smirked.
Malcolm looked back at Adaline and nodded as he put his arm around her and led her back to his bus.
I was frozen in place. Opening the door to his bus, Adaline walked into it while Malcolm turned and gave me a smile that would forever be etched in my memory.
The door to his bus shut as I stood there like an idiot and watched the door for Adaline to come back out. I felt numb as I walked back to my bus before I stopped walking.
“Fuck that.”
I started running over to Malcolm’s bus. Pulling the door open, I stumbled inside the bus only to find Adaline talking on the phone. Her eyes widened as she looked at me with her mouth gaped open. Looking to my right, Malcolm sat on the sofa with his arm around some girl.
“What are you doing here?” Adaline asked as I looked between her and Malcolm.
“I um . . . I saw you walk in here with Malcolm and I thought—”
Adaline lifted a finger for me to stop talking. “Yes. I have the locator turned on. Nothing. Okay, I’ll have to just buy another one I guess. Thank you so much.”
Hitting End, Adaline walked over and handed Malcolm the cell phone. “Thank you for letting me use your phone.”
Adaline looked at me with a disgusted face. Making her way over to me, she pushed me as hard as she could, causing me to stumble. “You *! You really thought I would just stop at the first guy I saw and f*ck him?”
“Well no, but I saw you come into his bus and my mind started racing.”
Tears fell freely from Adaline’s eyes and it felt like someone had stabbed my heart with a knife. “I lost my cell phone. I was going to ask you to use yours but we got to talking and well, I saw Malcolm and asked if I could use his phone. Fucking around is not my thing, Emmit. That’s your m.o.”
Adaline pushed me out of the way and took off again. Only this time, I didn’t go after her. I closed my eyes and dropped my head as I muttered, “Fuck.”
“Lewis, this is going to be the one and only time I’m straight up and honest with you,” Malcolm said as I lifted my eyes to look at him.
“You are a damn good race car driver. Probably the best I’ve ever seen and I will deny I said that until the day I die. But dude, you are handling this all wrong. Fucking other women to try and forget the love of your life will never work. Trust me. It. Doesn’t. Work. Stop approaching your feelings for Adaline like you do a race. Listen to your heart, not your head.”