Help Me Remember (Rose Canyon, #1)(12)

“Yes, I just left there. She said to tell you she’ll be here to see you a bit later today.”

Addison hasn’t come by since the day I woke up. She’s been so busy with getting things in order and handling the funeral arrangements.

“She’s really going to leave?”

“I think she just needs to breathe, and we all know the impossibility of that in this town.”

“I’ll miss her,” I say honestly.

“And she’ll miss you. She’s trying to understand a world where Isaac doesn’t exist.”

I look to Henry, trying to imagine what that would be for me. We have been dating for a long time, but there were a few times I’d considered breaking this off with him. Clearly, I didn’t go through with it.

“I wish I could do something to give her peace.”

“I’m sure you living and getting a second chance is all she needs,” Henry says.

Spencer’s eyes narrow. “A second chance for what?”

“Life,” Henry answers. “She’s alive and can . . .”

“Can what?” I ask.

“You get to decide if what you want now is what you had in your past. What if things can be different, Brie? What if we can be different?”

I look at him as my stomach slowly sinks. “What was wrong with us?”

“Nothing. Everything. I’m just wondering if maybe your memory blocked out a part of your life for a reason. Maybe whatever happened three years ago was painful and you regret it so much you wanted to forget it.”

Spencer scoffs. “That’s not how it works. She’s not blocking out an event. She has a TBI, and her brain is dealing with a trauma.”

“But what if he’s right?” I ask. “What if I’m remembering up until that part of my life because that’s where it all went wrong?” While the medical reasons may not be that, what if it is? What if I fucked up when I took a job here, and this is the chance to fix it?

I look to Spencer. “You told me to go back to the beginning. What if that’s what I’m doing?”

He shrugs. “I don’t know. If it is the beginning, you have to ask yourself what is the catalyst to it?”

Exactly. I remembered college. I remembered moving here. I remembered fighting with Henry about taking this job and not being with him. I remembered being excited to start something new. So, is it because I should’ve left him, or that I should’ve moved to Portland, and that’s what this is?

This is so frustrating.

“Well, I need to know. I need to go back to whatever that painful part is and push through so that I can help find my brother’s killer and whoever wanted to kill me.”

Henry presses his hand to my cheek. “You have to be patient and allow yourself to recover.”

I shake my head. “That’s not what I need. I am going to figure all this out. I’m already starting to remember things.”

“You have always been so stubborn.” He smiles, and his eyes fill with warmth.

“And you have always fought to protect me.”

“Always, Brie.”

“Then know that the only protection I need right now is from being protected.” I reach up, brushing the scruff on his cheek.

“Okay.”

“Thank you.”

Henry rests his forehead to mine. “I was so afraid I’d lost you forever.”

“I’m here.”

“Just don’t ever leave me.”

I smile. “I’ll try.”

“Good.” He presses his lips to mine, stopping the conversation.

I remember that we have someone in the room, but when I turn to look toward Spencer, he’s already gone. For some reason, the thought of him leaving makes my chest hurt.





Chapter Four





BRIELLE





I can’t do this. I can’t.

I can’t walk into this funeral home and see Isaac like this.

Addison comes to stand beside me, staring at the oak door to the funeral home. “We have to go inside, Brie.”

“How?” I ask my sister-in-law, who is stronger than I ever imagined.

“I don’t know, but we do. Isaac would need us to be strong.”

I reach out, taking her hand in mine. “I don’t feel strong.”

Without having to look, I know my brother’s best friends are standing behind us. Emmett, Spencer, and Holden are here, lending their support as the two of us take this second together.

They’ve been here, pillars of strength for both Addison and I. Emmett drove me home from the hospital to my mother’s hotel, ensuring I was safe as I had a panic attack before I left, worried that the person who did this was still out there.

Holden came by after he left the hospital to check on me and then went to stay with Addison to help her with anything she needed.

This morning, Spencer showed up with a black dress, shoes, and various other things he grabbed from my apartment, since I was not ready to return there, especially after Henry left for Portland on a work emergency. His father demanded he return and so he went.

Addy sighs. “The last time we were here was for your dad.”

It’s not fair that I’m returning now for my brother. “I don’t know how to walk in there,” I admit. “I don’t know how we do this.”