Finding Carly (SEAL Team Hawaii #5)(19)
“You think he, or she, will try to finish what Shawn started?” Baker asked.
Jag was getting annoyed. The man already knew the answer to that question. “Yes. If they were crazy enough to agree to the scheme in the first place, they’re invested. Maybe invested enough to see Shawn’s plan through.”
“Exactly. I’ll do some digging. Then I’ll be in touch.” Baker hung up without another word.
Jag felt edgy. Keyed up. He wanted to be doing something. Hunting down the suspects and interrogating them himself. But as an active-duty SEAL, he had to tread lightly. It was better that Baker did the legwork, but that didn’t mean Jag liked it.
Without hesitating, Jag spun around and stalked down the hall toward his room. It was earlier than he usually turned in, but then again, he didn’t normally have Carly waiting for him.
He slowly pushed open the bedroom door, and stared at the woman in his bed. She’d left the bathroom light on, giving him more than enough light to see. She was on the right, on her side, curled into a ball. He hated her defensive position.
He grabbed a pair of sweats and headed for the bathroom. Within a minute or so he was done and heading for the left side of his king-size bed. He’d left the bathroom light on, not wanting Carly to wake up and forget where she was.
He’d hadn’t lied earlier. He didn’t mind if Carly took the right side of the bed…because he usually slept in the middle. It made it harder for someone to sneak up on him in the dark hours of the night if he was smack dab in the center of the large mattress. He scooted over to his usual spot and couldn’t help but smile when Carly immediately turned and snuggled into him.
So much for not touching while they slept.
But a part of Jag knew this would happen. There was no way he’d be able to keep his distance. Not after he’d held her in his arms last night. He wanted the right to touch her, and not just in bed.
That was very new. He’d never been fixated on sex. Ever. And it was disconcerting to be thinking about it so often now. Sex with Carly would change his life, he knew that without a doubt in his mind.
He wasn’t ready for that step yet. He wanted to be sure. Wanted her to be sure. Wanted her to be with him because of who he was, not because he was keeping her safe. It was a dangerous line to walk because he had no idea if she’d ever be able to separate the two.
He was a SEAL, keeping people safe was what he did. Well, it wasn’t all he did, but it was a large part of who he was. He’d made it his mission in life early on to champion those who couldn’t protect themselves. The vulnerable and weak. Not that Carly was weak; far from it. Maybe he should be more worried about himself; about separating Carly from his own past.
Memories threatened to pull him into a dark place, and Jag did his best to push them back. He inhaled, bringing the slightly sweet smell of her lotion into his nose. He’s seen her bottle on his bathroom sink. Cherry blossom. He’d never smell it again without thinking of her.
“What time is it?” she mumbled.
“Shhhh,” Jag whispered. “Late.”
It wasn’t really that late, but he didn’t want her to fully wake up and feel weird about being snuggled next to him and turn away, putting space between them once more.
“’Kay.”
He held his breath until he felt puffs of air from her long, deep breaths waft over his skin. There were a million and one things Jag needed to think about. Things he wanted to do to help Carly. But at the moment, all he could focus on was how right it felt to have her by his side.
Slowly, he lifted a hand and smoothed her hair away from her face. Her nose scrunched up a little at his touch, but she snuggled into him even more. Her blonde hair was spread across his pillow and he resisted the urge to bring the strands up to his nose to inhale her scent. Her face was relaxed in sleep and she had tempting full lips he couldn’t stop staring at. She was only a little bit shorter than he was, and he loved how she fit against him.
Being as attracted to her as he was, noticing every little detail about her, should’ve surprised him. Jag had never cared about a woman’s looks, really; he was more concerned about any ulterior motives they might have.
And they always seemed to have them. Wanting to sleep with a SEAL just to say they’d done it. Wanted something from him. To use him in some way. It wasn’t until Mustang hooked up with Elodie that Jag had met a woman who was completely selfless. Elodie loved his team leader unconditionally, and the sentiment was definitely returned. Then Lexie had come into Midas’s life, and Jag witnessed the same thing between them.
By the time Aleck met Kenna, Jag had begun to open himself up to the possibility that maybe, just maybe, there was someone out there for him too. Monica and Pid’s relationship had strengthened the idea.
And now here he was, with Carly. Oh, they weren’t in a relationship. Not a romantic one, at least. But he felt much more comfortable because they’d started out as friends. He’d gotten to know her over the last few months and trust had grown.
For the first time in his life, Jag wanted a girlfriend. Wanted to share his space with someone. He even found himself wanting to open up to her, to let her in and share all his hidden secrets. But it was definitely too early for that.
In the meantime, he’d do what he could to help Carly take back her life…and if anyone tried to take it away from her again, they’d have to deal with him.
Susan Stoker's Books
- Defending Zara (Mountain Mercenaries #6)
- Defending Morgan (Mountain Mercenaries #3)
- Defending Everly (Mountain Mercenaries, #5)
- Finding Kenna (SEAL Team Hawaii #3)
- Defending Raven (Mountain Mercenaries #7)
- Defending Everly (Mountain Mercenaries #5)
- Claiming Sarah (Ace Security #5)
- Defending Harlow (Mountain Mercenaries #4)
- Defending Morgan (Mountain Mercenaries #3)
- Claiming Felicity (Ace Security #4)