Fighting Redemption(26)

“Don’t say anything, Fin. Just … let me hold you, okay?”

Pressed against his chest, she could feel his heart beating heavily and she closed her eyes. As the song slowly faded out, another song kicked in and she was dragged away from Ryan and into the arms of her dad.

“How’s my girl?” He beamed down at her, spinning her quickly away as a livelier tune began.

Ryan’s eyes held hers until the crowd swallowed him up and she couldn’t see him anymore.





Fin rolled over in bed and glared at the clock. Two a.m. glared right back at her. Bunching her pillow, she huffed as she tried to find the peace that eluded her.

Her bedroom door opened so quietly she wouldn’t have known if she hadn’t seen the brief flicker of moonlight stream through.

She sat up, brushing tousled waves from her face as it clicked shut. Her eyes fell on Ryan walking silently to her bed. In a pair of sweatpants, his chest was bare. Muscled ridges, tattoos and deep scars greeted her as he reached her bedside.

“Ryan?”

“Shhh,” he whispered softly and lifting up the sheet, climbed into bed beside her. He tugged her close.

Fin put her hands between them, splaying them flat on his chest. The heat of him burned her skin. “Ryan … Ian is—”

“Don’t say his name. Tonight you’re mine. If Ian wanted you as much as he f*cking claims he does, he’d be here right now where I am, dragging out every last minute he could get with you.” Ryan’s hands slid down the small of her back and underneath the elastic of her panties until his hands gripped her ass. “He’d be the one touching you.” He leaned in and bit her earlobe sharply before licking it better and she shivered. “He’d be the one tasting you,” he breathed in her ear. “But he’s not here. I am. I’m the one touching you. I’m the one holding you, because you’ve never been his.”

Ryan’s mouth travelled across her jaw until it hovered over hers.

“Kiss me, Fin,” he whispered against her lips. “Please.”

Tears burned her eyes at his desperate plea. Hardly daring to breathe, she pressed her lips lightly against his. Ryan groaned at the touch and crushed his mouth down on hers. Fin opened her mouth under his, and when his tongue touched hers, she moaned. Her hands slid from his chest, downwards, until they were tugging at the waistband of his sweatpants. Shuddering, Ryan reached up and fisted her hair, tilting her head as he kissed her hard.

When he pulled back, he was breathing heavy, his lips swollen. “You’re so beautiful,” he murmured.

Her chest tightened under the intensity of his eyes. “So are you.”

Ryan shook his head as he hovered over her in the bed. “I carry scars, Fin, both inside and out.”

“Everyone’s perception of beauty is different.”

“Fin, I—”

She cut him off, kissing him, and he groaned, his body pressing her into the bed. He slid his hand between them, skimming down until he reached the edge of her panties. He broke the kiss, panting hard as he fumbled with the elastic before sliding his hand between her thighs.

Ryan groaned as he touched the slick heat of her.

“Ryan, I can’t …” She drew in a deep, shaky breath. “I can’t be the person that does this to someone else. I want you so much, but the guilt. I don’t know if I can—”

“Stop,” he whispered. He slid his hand from her panties and buried his face in her neck. She could feel his hot breath as he shuddered against her, fighting for control.

“I’m sorry,” she choked out.

“Please don’t be sorry,” he mumbled against her skin. “Don’t ever be sorry. Guilt is the one thing I can’t let you live with, baby. I won’t do that to you, even if it kills me.”

Fin swallowed the lump in her throat. After a beat of silence, she asked, “Ryan, will you stay?”

Ryan nodded wordlessly and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close until it was almost difficult to breathe under the heat of his body. She turned, her lips brushing his, and he licked along her bottom lip before kissing her softly.

He closed his eyes briefly. “Be safe out there, Fin.”

“You too, Ryan.”

Wound tightly together, they drifted off to sleep, and when five a.m. came, Fin got up and dressed quietly. A light tap came at her bedroom door. Picking up her bag, her hand fell on the door handle and she turned, her eyes taking in Ryan where he lay sleeping heavily. He’d rolled onto his stomach, revealing more tattoos and thick muscle. One hand rested beneath the pillow, the other fisted near his face. His dark hair, cut so short when he arrived, was starting to grow. It made him look like the young boy he used to be.

Fin tucked the memory away and opened the bedroom door. Slipping out quietly, she pulled it shut behind her.

“Ready to go?” Jake asked softly.

No. She ached to feel Ryan’s eyes on her one last time, see his smile, and feel his lips against hers. He was just metres away from her, yet an ocean already lay between them.

Fin closed her eyes. “Yes,” she whispered.

Jake picked up the last of her bags from the hallway and grinned at her.

“Did you pack your Supergirl suit for those special occasions?”

She chuckled through tears. “I love you, Jake.”