Fatal Reckoning (Fatal #14)(69)
“Give me one second?”
“Of course.”
Justine left the door ajar while she went to consult with her daughter.
Sam leaned against the wall, feeling like a jerk for disturbing these people at such a difficult time. What the hell was she doing here in the middle of their nightmare? I ought to go. She eyed the stairwell. It’s wrong for me to be here. In all her years as a Homicide detective, she’d never once “stopped by” to visit victims without it pertaining to an ongoing investigation.
She pushed herself off the wall, intending to leave.
Justine came to the door. “She’d like to see you.”
Sam followed her into a bright, stylish apartment where Roni was on the sofa, covered with a blanket, her face red and puffy, her hair ratty around her shoulders and her eyes… Sam could barely stand to look at the eyes that held her devastation. “Hi, Roni.”
“Hi.”
Sam sat next to her. “I wanted to stop by to check on you.” On the end table next to Roni, Sam noticed a gorgeous wedding photo of Roni and Patrick, the two of them gazing at each other and wearing huge smiles.
“I’m still here.” Roni forced a small smile. “Everyone has been so amazing and supportive.”
“I’m glad you’re being well loved.”
Absently, Roni spun her diamond engagement ring around her finger. It sat above a diamond wedding band. “I’m just not sure what to do now, you know? Patrick… We had so many plans, and now…” She shrugged helplessly and glanced at Sam. “I don’t know what to do. I write obituaries for a living, but I don’t know where to begin with Patrick’s.”
Sam’s heart broke for her. “Is there someone who could help you with that?”
“Lots of people, but I want to do it myself.”
“That’s understandable.” Sam tried to find some words of wisdom that would help Roni, but really, what could anyone say that would truly help? “I’m sure it seems impossible today, but you will find a way through this.”
“I guess so. What choice do I have?”
“If there’s anything at all I can do for you at any time, please call me.” Sam placed her business card on the coffee table. “My cell number is on there.”
“It’s very nice of you to come by. You must be so busy, and you just lost your father.”
“Yes, I did, and while it’s not the same thing, I know what it’s like to wonder how you’re going to survive without someone.”
Roni’s eyes filled as she nodded.
“We have something in common, you and me. We’re both victims of violent crime. I’ve been thinking about putting together a group for people like us, those who’ve been left shattered by the sort of thing that happened to Patrick. If it’s all right with you, I’ll let you know what we decide to do. It might be helpful to you.”
“That would be nice. Thank you.”
“If there’s anything at all I can do for you, please call.”
“I will. It was good of you to come by.”
“Do you mind if I stop by again to check on you?”
“I wouldn’t mind. It’s nice of you to care.”
“I’m so sorry again for your loss. From what everyone says, Patrick was a brilliant, well-respected agent.”
“He was the smartest person I ever knew.”
Sam, who wasn’t known for being a hugger, leaned in to hug the young woman, who clung to her for a long time. “I’ll be in touch,” she said when they finally released each other, both of them blinking back tears.
Roni nodded and wiped the tears from her face.
Justine showed Sam out. “Thank you for coming by.”
“Please let me know if there’s anything I can do.”
“We will.”
Sam went down the stairs and out to her car, taking greedy, deep breaths of the cool air. For a long time after she got into her car, she sat there thinking about Roni and Patrick and the terrible loss of a promising young life. Then she pounded her hand on the steering wheel and screamed with frustration until her hand and throat began to hurt so badly she had no choice but to stop.
She took a few minutes to pull herself together, pushing the rage back into the back corner, where it had lived for four seemingly endless years. After opening the window, she took several more breaths, trying to settle her ragged emotions before she went home to her family. She’d become accustomed to hiding the rage, to living with it, to carrying it with her everywhere she went. But since her father died, it had been harder to hide the ever-present fury over what’d been taken from him and everyone who loved him.
Maybe that was why she’d needed to see Roni, so the other woman would know there was someone out there who understood how she felt. Or maybe she’d done it for herself, so she could be with someone who understood how she felt. Whatever the reason, she was glad she’d come, that she’d had the chance to express her condolences and speak to Roni about the support group that would be happening. It was no longer just an idea. Roni’s unspeakable grief had made Sam more determined than ever to do something for people who desperately needed a place to turn when their lives were ruined by violence.
If she could help to give them even five minutes of comfort, it would be time well spent.