Fall From Grace(60)

Grabbing my laundry basket, I raced to the basement and started our archaic washing machine.  When I did, I could hear Shane screaming from the shower above me.  If he was really going to stay here for a while, he better get used to taking ice cold showers!

Overhead, I could hear him stomping through the apartment looking for me.  Hearing the stairs creak under his weight, I turned to the door as he smashed it open.  He strode across the tiny washroom, stopping a little more than an inch from me.  His hair and skin were soaking wet; drops of water streamed down his skin.

“You really need to do your laundry right now?  What? Are you mad at me for wanting to stay here?  Ticked off because I might actually care if you are okay?  What?  Will it ruin your high expectations of me?”  He cupped my face in both his hands, his breath quickening as he searched my face.  “Or, maybe Grace, you want me here every freaking bit as much I want to be here and that scares the shit out of you?”

My eyes looked down.  His towel was loosely wrapped around his waist.  God, please don’t let that thing fall off!  My eyes rose slowly over the beautiful muscles of his stomach and chest; over the vibrant colors of his tattoos right to his blue eyes.

I tore my face away from his hands.  “Nothing about you scares me, Shane.  I just don’t want you getting the wrong idea about us.”

“I know, I know.  There is no us.  I’m not talking about staying here to...”  Realization crossed his face.  “Grace, you really think so little of me to think that I want to stay here so I could try to...”  He stepped back shaking his head.  Turning around, he walked up the stairs and continued with his icy shower.

I opened a folding chair and sat watching the machine vibrating, knowing he was right.  I did want him here.  Guilt overwhelmed my senses.  How many years had I made it through whole lifetimes of other people, never feeling anything for another man the way I did for him.  Now, I’m here with the Shane, the most commitment phobic person I had ever met and he’s the one that peaks my interest?  There was no way that I could break the vows I made to myself to find him, on someone as flimsy and shallow as Shane Maxton.  I don’t care how absolutely delicious he looked right out of an ice cold shower!

At three o’clock, Shane came down to the laundry room with a plate of food a hot cup of coffee for me.  “I thought you’d be starving by now.”

I smiled.  “More bored out of my skull than hungry, but thank you.”  Grilled cheese sandwich with tomato and a banana.  I dug in hungrily.

He chuckled to himself shaking his head, “You know, Grace, you don’t have to stay down here.  I promise you I will not bite,” he smirked.  “Well, unless you ask me to.”

“Shut up,” I smirked back at him.  “I’m sorry about before,” I said in-between chews.  I knew it was impolite, but I was really hungry and I just wanted to apologize fast so we could forget about everything.  “I guess I’m just a little freaked out by the whole Carl Sumpton thing.”

Shrugging as if it was no big deal, he asked seriously, “Do you remember him at the hospice?”

“Not at all,” I said, swallowing my last bite.  “He did look familiar, but not from anywhere I could pinpoint.”  Shaking my head, I threw my hands up.  “There were so many people there.  I used to play my guitar for Jake every night, well, up until the last few days. There was always a different crowd of people surrounding the door listening. But if he was comatose, he shouldn’t have known anything about me. I barely left Jake’s room, let alone walk into other patient’s rooms.”