Existence(8)

“Me too. It sucked, didn’t it?” Wyatt chimed in, as he took the seat beside Miranda. She beamed over at him and I suddenly felt a little left out.

“And Pagan needs a date to the dance. We can’t go without her.” Miranda said grinning at Wyatt.

“I am pretty sure Pagan can get a date if she wants one.” He took a bite of his hamburger. I knew he intended to do his best to rein in Miranda’s match-making ideas. I flashed him a grateful smile.

“There isn’t anyone I really want to go with.” This was a lie and I knew it. I forced myself not to look at Leif’s table because doing so would give me away. Wyatt, however, glanced over at Leif’s table and back at me with a smirk.

Thankfully Miranda missed his subtle hint and Wyatt decided not to verbalize his thoughts. Miranda picking up on my interest in Leif was the last thing I needed.

“But it won’t be fun without you,” Miranda pouted. I took another drink of my tea. I didn’t want to argue with her about this. “Come on, Pagan, it has been like six months since Jay left. We miss him, too, but he moved away. You need to date again.”

It was the first time the mention of my former boyfriend didn’t make me sad. I’d started dating him my ninth grade year and he’d been a junior. After graduation this past May he left for college and his parents moved to another state. We 25



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both agreed a long distance relationship would be too hard and we broke up. At first, I’d been lost. I’d assumed it must be a broken heart. It didn’t take me long to realize I missed the comfort of our relationship. Deep down, we’d just been really good friends. We liked the same things and cared about the same things

“It isn’t because of Jay. I just haven’t met anyone else who interests me.”

Wyatt’s grin got bigger as he took another bite of his burger. If he wasn’t careful I would strangle that goofy grin off his face.

Miranda sighed in exasperation. “It’s a pity you spend every evening with Leif Montgomery and you don’t even like him. I just don’t get it.”

Wyatt raised his eyebrows at her and frowned. “What are you saying, Miranda?”

She puckered her lips and tried to look serious. “Oh, stop it, Wyatt, you know I love you.” He bent down and gave her a peck on the lips before returning to his food. She turned her attention back to me with a silly grin on her face and I wanted to laugh. “I’m just saying if you could get past your dislike for him it would be a prime opportunity.” I thought for a minute about continuing to let her think I really disliked Leif. Somehow it seemed unfair to Leif. He didn’t deserve my dislike and letting others think I didn’t like him was wrong.

“I don’t dislike Leif. He isn’t like what I thought. I was wrong about him. However, I’m also not hot after him. ” I glanced up from my tray half afraid Miranda might have managed to read between the lines but instead she looked like a deer caught in the headlights. She wasn’t focused on me, her gaze was locked on something or someone behind me.

“Well, I’m glad to know you’re not hot after me. One less worry on my mind.”

I closed my eyes tightly, hoping I’d just imagined Leif’s 26



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voice. His shoulder brushed mine as he sat down beside me and I slowly opened my eyes to see a very amused Wyatt watching me. I cleared my throat and forced a smile I didn’t feel, before turning to look at Leif.

“Hi,” I said simply and he chuckled, nudging my shoulder with his arm.

“Relax, Pagan, it’s okay. I’m aware you used to hate my guts and have had a realization from the gods that I’m not so bad after all. It’s cool.” I resisted the desire to sigh in relief.

“So, what brings you to the lower class tables?” Wyatt asked, grinning at his own humor.

Leif glanced over at him and raised an eyebrow in surprise. “Oh, you mean this is lower class? I had no idea. It has the star athlete being scouted by colleges,” he motioned to Wyatt, “his girlfriend,” motioning to Miranda, “and last year’s homecoming queen,” he said, turning to me.

I rolled my eyes, “That was only because of my date and you know it.”

“No, I don’t know it.”

I knew I was blushing and I hated it. My gaze met Miranda’s and I realized she was soaking in every word. This wasn’t good. She wouldn’t miss my pink cheeks. “What is it you need?” I asked, trying not to sound rude.

He grinned as if he could read my mind. “I wanted to tell you I got an A on my speech.”

“That’s wonderful. It’s a really good speech. You had some great stuff in it.”

“Yes, but I couldn’t have done it without your help.” I smiled and stared back down at my food. I hadn’t told anyone, Miranda included, about Leif’s dyslexia or his adoption. Those weren’t my stories to tell.

“Are you coming to the game tonight?” he asked, and I glanced back up at him, surprised by his question.

“Um, no, probably not.”

He frowned, and then nodded and stood up. “Well, thanks again, and I guess I’ll see you Monday, then.” 27



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“Okay. Good luck tonight,” I replied. Had it hurt his feelings that I wasn’t going to the game? I turned back around in my seat and Wyatt shook his head.