Endless Knight(92)

“I wasn’t born with my curse.” Shot, refill. “My father held a dance for me to choose a wife. I danced with many. The next day, they were all plagued with illness—just from holding my hand. Yet at the time, no one had reason to believe I was the cause. It wasn’t until my curse grew in strength, until my touch killed in seconds, that I knew I was responsible. Two of my last accidental victims were my parents.”


Even after all this time, the guilt in his expression was raw.

“Crazed with grief, I left my home, stumbling blindly into the game. In time, I began to comprehend what I was. I was damned to win, to be immortal for all time, to be alone.” He exhaled a weary breath. “And then I met you.”


Was he finally going to reveal what had happened between us?

“I’d gone more than a year without contact by this time. It doesn’t sound like much, but imagine that long without a single handshake or a relative’s embrace. Without so much as a brush of skin as coin changes hands.”


Even here, I’d had contact. I roughhoused with Lark, and I’d had those fleeting contacts with Death. His existence must’ve been a living nightmare.

“I stroked your face, intending to end you. Yet you never fell ill. I can still remember how shockingly soft your skin was. How warm.” He seemed to get lost in the memory. Voice gone hoarse, he said, “I shuddered to feel it against mine.” He glanced up sharply, clearing his throat. “You were as stunned as I was.”


“Did we . . . ?”


He gave a curt shake of his head, eyes beginning to glow—this time with fury.

Heedless of his anger, I pressed on. “Then if we haven’t slept together, have you ever?” I wasn’t a virgin, but he might be.

His glass shattered in his fist.

“I-I guess not. But you’d intended to with me?” To my bed, Empress.

“Until you betrayed me.”


“How?” When he gave a pointed glance at the necklace, I said, “What if I never can remember? I need to know!”


He grated, “I told you, creature. You folded first.”


“The two of us had called a truce before?”


He rose with a disgusted expression—but I didn’t think it was directed toward me. He looked disgusted with himself, as if this encounter had just gone sideways.

“I ready for my departure,” he said dismissively, striding toward an adjoining door.

I scrambled to follow. He muttered a curse when I barreled through the doorway behind him.

I gaped at his firelit room. The ceiling and walls were solid black, the floor veined black marble. His jet-black armor hung on a stand, as if another man were in the room with us. The sole piece of furniture was a carved sleigh bed. His sheets were twisted.

Did he suffer from wicked dreams as well?

He scowled around his room, clearly regretting that I’d seen his most personal space.

“Do you know what I think, Death?” When I perched on the edge of his bed, he turned away with a sharp inhalation. “I think you missed me this morning in the gym.”


Jaw clenched, he crossed to his armor.

“And I think you’re going to miss me when you leave. Whenever you’re out there by yourself, does that gut-wrenching loneliness come creeping back?”


He stiffened.

“You hate this existence, and I think you secretly hope I can help you find another one.”


“It doesn’t matter what I hope. Because I can’t trust you.”


“If you could, would you want more with me? Would you want to be with me?”


“This was a mistake. You need to leave.” With hasty movements, he buckled a layer of metal over his right leg, another over his left. “You are forbidden from this part of the manor from now on.”


I gasped. “You do want to be with me.” As soon as I said the words, I accepted that I might want my life to be here with him as well. “Please don’t go yet. Just talk to me, Aric.”


He tensed at the use of his name, as if I’d struck him. “Leave now. If I recollect your betrayal, I might kill you. If I recollect how you’ve betrayed me already in this life . . .”


I shot to my feet. “What have I done to you?” He’d captured me, imprisoned me. When I’d attacked him and his alliance, I’d only been defending myself.

“I am warning you—leave me.” Turning away, he yanked off his shirt to don his breastplate. Even in the midst of this discord, I gazed longingly at his back flexing.

He shoved on his gauntlets and turned, seeming surprised to see that I was still there. Did no one else disobey him?

“Any woman with sense would’ve heeded my warning.” He strapped on his sword belt.

Yes, he had warned me, but I’d already learned more about him than ever before, and I sensed he was on the verge of confiding even more. Or, well, killing me. I squared my shoulders. “I’m staying.”


He reached for his helmet, tucking it under one arm, then stalked up to me, a fearsome sight. At that moment, I completely believed some death god had chosen this man to be his knight. When we were toe to toe, I craned my head up.

Emotions sped over his face, too many to latch on to just one. “Then I’m going.” He stalked around me and left the room.