Eighteen (18)(61)

There’s loud music on the other end. “Shannon?” It’s Danny. “You coming tonight?”

“What time is it? I fell asleep.”

“What’s wrong?”

How does he always know? “Nothing,” I say. “I was just so tired, I fell asleep.”

He says something else, but the music is so loud, I can’t hear. And then the call drops.

I almost laugh at that. But what do I expect? When things start unraveling in my life, they don’t stop until there’s nothing left. I plop down on the couch and stare at the TV in the dark as all the things that happened today come rushing back.

A few minutes later there’s a knock at the door. It opens without me even getting up. Danny Alexander stands in my doorway. “Shannon?”

He’s backlit by the outside lights so all I see is a shadow. “What are you doing here?” I say from the couch.

He comes in, closes the door, and walks over to stand in front of me. “Why are you sitting in the dark?”

“Did you know Jason was moving to San Diego with that girl?”

“Um.” Danny sits down next to me and frowns. He did.

“God, I’m so stupid.”

“Jason’s been around Phil’s a lot lately. For work and stuff.”

“I can’t believe you call what he’s doing work. He’s a drug runner, Danny. And he’s taking Olivia to San Diego. Did he ever have a restaurant job? Or has he always been doing these bigruns from Mexico?”

“Shit, Shannon, I’m not supposed to be telling you any of this. Phil would kick my ass, especially since you’re dating Alesci.”

“He’s not a f*cking narc, Danny.”

“Whatever. But yeah, I knew. I figured you did too, Shannon. I had no idea Jason was skipping out on you.”

“God, I really feel stupid.”

“He’s an * anyway. You’re better off without him.”

“I know that, Danny. But he’s taking Olivia. And I know you don’t know my whole story, but she’s the last thing I have in this world. She’s the only family I have, OK? And I need her.”

He stars at me for a few seconds. “You don’t know my story either. My mom never recovered from that bust. She got worse. She came out of jail so much worse than she went in. She was dealing drugs, doing drugs—”

“Then why do you do it?”

“I gotta make money to get the f*ck out of here somehow. Might as well be the family business, right?” He laughs, but I don’t. “Look, I don’t deal like Phil or Jason. I sell joints. Pot is practically legal now. It’s not the same.”

“It will be the same if you keep doing it.”

“I’m not going to keep doing it. I’m retired now. I sold the last of my stock a few days ago. No more high school, right? No more kids who want to get stoned at lunch or after school. Rocky and I are going to Santa Barbara for school at the end of the summer. Why do you think I was in the counseling office that day we met? Rocky and I had just gotten back from visiting the campus for recruitment week and my counselor wanted to know how it went. That’s why you never saw me at Phil’s over Christmas break.”

How did I not know this about him? Why did I just assume he was a loser like me? “Great, so everyone is leaving this shithole but me. And I don’t even belong here. Jesus Christ, can my life get any more f*cking ironic?”

“I’m sorry,” he says. “I didn’t realize you were so attached to the baby. If I had, I would’ve…”

But he stops mid-sentence and drops that thought. “Would’ve what?” I ask.

He smiles. “I would’ve made more of an effort, you know? To fill you in on what’s been going on.”

“It’s not your fault. I’ve just been so busy with my own life, I wasn’t paying attention. I just wanted to assume Jason was a good guy.”

“He’s not,” Danny says, looking down at me through the dark hair covering his eyes. “He’s not a good guy, Shannon. And he should not be allowed to take that baby away.”

“I agree. But I have no recourse. I’m her aunt. If he marries that girl, she’ll probably have more right to Olivia than I do.”

He sighs and then sinks back into the couch cushions next to me. We sit like that, thinking about the conversation for a few minutes. And then he says, “Let’s go to the party.”

I say nothing.

“Come on,” he says, standing up and taking my hand, pulling me to my feet. “Let’s think about this tomorrow. You know I’ll help you any way I can, right?”

“I know.” He will too. Say what you will about his uncle, and selling joints is really not a good way to pay your way through college, but Danny Alexander is a stand-up guy.

As we walk up the alley the music from his party gets louder and louder, and when we get to West Street, I can see that most of the fenced backyard is filled with people.

“Let’s go in the front, I need to show you something.”

“Sure,” I say, feeling a little uneasy about the party. I’d rather be inside anyway. I’m not used to this anymore. I’ve been out of this scene for too long. And I have no real friends at Anaheim except Danny. There’s no way Josie and Mary are at a party like this.