Drop Dead Sexy(46)

“And the plot thickens,” Catcher mused.

“Yeah,” Zeke replied. He gave a short wave before he hopped in the back of the ambulance. As the doors shut, the wail of the ambulance kicked up.

Catcher jerked his chin toward the hillside where we’d parked. “Let’s get going. There’s no one else here I need to question. Zeke and Ezra are the ones with the answers.”

I nodded. Catcher and I weaved our way through the crowd of onlookers that were hanging around the edge of the tent. When they saw us, people stopped talking and stared wide-eyed. I guess Catcher’s snake shoot-up had them a little shaken.

“Bless you, ma’am,” an elderly man said.

The comment took me so off guard that I tripped over my own feet. “Um, thank you.”

A heavy-set woman in a faded housedress stepped in front of our path. Her hands were clasped like she was about to start praying. “Might I touch the hem of your skirt?”

While slightly recoiling back from the woman, I glanced around the anxious faces. “I don’t understand.”

“The scriptures say that the woman with the blood issue was healed by touching just the hem of Christ’s garment.”

My eyes bulged at her statement, and I held my hands up. “I’m sorry, but you’re mistaken. I don’t have any mythical healing properties.”

“But you saved Pastor Ezra from the serpents,” a twenty-something looking guy in overalls protested.

“By using common medical knowledge that I learned in one of my college classes. I’m just a coroner.” When they still stared earnestly at me, I shook my head. “Seriously. I just work with dead people. I’ve never been able to resurrect any of them.”

My response didn’t seem to sway the people’s respect. I forced a smile to my lips. “We have to go now. But thank you.”

I then started powerwalking away from the tent with Catcher on my heels.

Once we were inside the safety of the convertible, I reached over to lock the door before I buckled my seatbelt. Catcher chuckled. “Are you really afraid of those holy rollers?”

“Yes, as a matter of fact I am. We’re talking about people who risk their lives by taking the Bible so literally that they physically handle snakes, rather than just symbolically.”

“I don’t think you had anything to worry about considering they were ready to worship you. I’m the one who should’ve been worried considering I’ve known you in the biblical sense.”

“False religious adulation by whacked-out people is pretty damn scary. I mean, look at Jonestown and the Branch Davidians. Shit gets epically crazy when they realize that you’re a fake and then turn on you.”

As he pulled the car onto the road, Catcher reached over and took my hand in his. “Don’t worry. I won’t let the crazy Bible Thumpers get you.”

I giggled while trying not to swoon like a lovesick school girl at his words. “Thank you.”

He winked. “Anytime.”



True to his word, Zeke was waiting on us outside the emergency room doors. “How is Ezra?” I asked.

“Doctors haven’t been out yet, but the paramedics told me while he has a rough twenty-four hours ahead of him, he should be fine.” He smiled at me. “Thanks to you.”

I held up my hands. “There’s no need to thank me. I’m just grateful I paid attention in that seminar during my forensic science degree on wildlife injuries and deaths.”

Since the waiting room was packed with people, Zeke gestured for us to go outside. We followed him out the mechanized doors and over to a secluded side of the hospital.

Catcher cocked his brows at Zeke. “Is all this secrecy necessary?”

“Yes and not just because I’m on probation.” He reached into the back pocket of his pants and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. After we refused his offer of one, he lit up and took a long drag. He glanced left and right before exhaling a puff of smoke. “Our entire ministry is a lie.”

“You don’t say?” Catcher responded, amusement twinkling in his eyes.

“There’s nothing spiritually different about Ezra. You see, all his life he’s been a faithful guy. About fifteen years ago, he felt the calling to start preaching. He tried to start several churches, but they all eventually failed. It all boiled down to the fact there just isn’t anything special about him. After visiting a snake-handling church, he decided that was his true calling.” Ezra shook his head as he took another drag on his cigarette. “I tried ‘til I was blue in the face to talk him out of it, but he was bound and determined to do it. As luck would have it, it was around that time I ended up being thrown in county lockup for public drunkenness.”

Catcher snorted. “Nice.”

Ezra stomped out his cigarette. “Hey, I never said I was the overly faithful one. You could call me the prodigal son at best.”

“Gotcha. So what happened when you were in lockup?”

“I shared a cell with this guy who had been arrested earlier that night for public lewdness.” At what must’ve been my curious expression, Zeke said, “He was screwing women on a pool table at the local bar.”

Heat flooded my face. “Oh,” I murmured at the same time Catcher questioned, “Women?”

Zeke nodded. “Apparently, he’d done two already and had a line of volunteers waiting to be next.”