Downfall(31)

I took my time washing my hair. I shaved my legs and any other part of me which needed to be groomed. I used a liberal amount of body wash and scrubbed myself down until every single part of me felt spotless and smooth. It was a simple luxury, but one I’d missed out on for far too long.

When I got out of the shower, I threw on a stretchy black tank and a pair of yoga pants, figuring I was headed right to bed as soon as I collected my kid and finished the heart to heart with Solo. Plus, he’d already seen me covered in restaurant castoffs looking like something the cat dragged in. At least I smelled like orange blossoms now and not fries.

I tapped on the door again and was immediately ushered inside. The apartment was dim, Solo had a beer in his hand and offered to grab me one from the fridge. Figuring I might need the liquid courage, I accepted as I made my way to the massive couch which filled his living room. His laptop was open on the coffee table and SpongeBob Squarepants was playing without the sound on his huge, flat screen TV. The sight made me smile and I realized how lucky Noble and I were to end up in this really bad place inhabited by some really great people. Maybe it was true. Once you hit rock bottom, the only way to go was up.

I took the cold beer and clasped it between my hands. Solo situated himself next to me on the couch, one arm thrown over the back as he turned sideways so he was looking directly at me. Part of me wanted to ask him to put a shirt on so I could get through the little I could tell him without distraction, but a way bigger part of me was enjoying the view too much to say anything.

I looked down at the drink in my hand, then up at the man sitting across from me. “It’s weird that I’m old enough to be someone’s mother, but not old enough to drink this beer legally.” I sighed. “Most of the time I feel like I skipped right over being a teenager.”

Solo nodded and took a swig of his drink. “Most of us who grew up in the city feel that way. We never really got a chance to experience being young and carefree. We’re born on the defense and ready to fight.”

I sighed and leaned my head back against the cushion of the couch. “Oh, I had it pretty good when I was growing up. Both my parents come from money so I didn’t really want for anything.” Aside from basic love and affection. I’d been spoiled and bratty enough not to care too much about the absence of either of those things until I realized I was going to be the one responsible for providing them for a new, fragile life. “I had a really nice car, a gift from my mother for my sixteenth birthday. When I had to leave where I used to live, I sold it. I used the cash from the sale to make sure Noble and I would have a roof over our heads for a year. I figured shelter was the most pressing need I had to cover.”

I could see a million questions shooting through his dark eyes, but the only one he asked was, “What kind of car did you sell?”

Considering he was a car guy, it shouldn’t have surprised me, but it did. “Uh, a Jaguar F-TYPE.” It was a far cry from the beater I was driving now.

His eyes widened and he nearly choked on a mouthful of beer. “That’s a sixty-thousand-dollar car, Orley. I’ve never even seen one in person. A year’s worth of rent in this dump is barely thirteen thousand. Why are you living like a pauper?”

I sucked in a breath through my teeth and squeezed the chilly bottle between my palms. “I didn’t sell it for what it was worth. I took the best cash offer I got. I paid for this apartment for a year, set some emergency money aside, and the rest…” I sighed and closed my eyes. “I paid off Noble’s father. I knew he was going to be the weak link, the only tie that would keep me tethered to our old life. I bribed him to sign away his parental rights, and since he’s gallivanting around Europe, acting like he doesn’t care about a damn thing, he took the money and ran.” I didn’t regret getting him out of the way in the slightest, even if keeping some of the money would have made things easier for me and Noble along the way. My daughter was mine and mine alone. No one was ever going to have any kind of claim on her. I was never going to lose her. “That’s where the money came from. That’s how I could afford a year’s worth of rent.”

I stared at him silently, waiting for the much harder questions. The ones I didn’t know if I was ever going to be able to answer. He regarded me thoughtfully while we finished our drinks in a tense silence.

When he reached out and took the empty bottle from my hand, my breath caught and I could feel my heart pound against my ribs. When he leaned in close, I caught a hint of something minty clinging to his skin, and could immediately feel the heat radiating off his bare skin. My eyes locked on the tattoo inked across the base of his throat. I wanted to press forward and put my mouth on it. Sucking in a shaky breath, I reluctantly lifted my gaze up to his.

I went still as a statue when one of his hands reached out and hooked a strand of damp hair which had escaped my messy ponytail.

“I have questions. You know I do. However, I can see you aren’t ready to answer them.” I nodded slowly as his warm palm settled against my cheek. We both inhaled a noisy breath and started to involuntarily move closer to one another. “I can also see that you didn’t bother to put a bra on after your shower. Guess which of those things I can’t stop thinking about?”

I shivered when he used his thumb to trace the line of my cheekbone. I lowered my lashes and told him, “Trying to have a conversation with you while you’re half-dressed wasn’t nearly as easy as I made it look either.”